Dreams

It was dark. I was standing in complete Blackness, my Heart beating like a drum. I had always feared the Darkness but at the same time felt an unhealthy amount of attraction towards it. But this was not normal Darkness. This one was Heavy and suppressing, making it hard to breath.

I knew this was a Dream. I fact I knew the Dream itself very well. I had had it several times. It kept visiting me, ever since the Night that Lily died.

As if my thoughts had called her to me, there she was standing and smiling at me, her Green Eyes sparkling with so much Life that the prospect of her being dead seemed so very unreasonable. Then she changed, and Lily became James. How I loathed him. Even after Death I could never forgive him for stealing her from me. Never.

But know that I looked closer I saw that it wasn't James. It was Harry. His Son. But also her son. This boy looked so much like James that I barely could suppress my hate sometime. But then he looked my way, and there were her eyes, emeralds shining through the deepest blackness, as if she told me she would always be watching over me, even know.

He looked sad and tearful and very lonely at me. His Voice quivered as he begged:"Severus..." He called for me. But I could not move. And there he was. Behind Harry, high, towering, a face so cruel that I wanted to run away immediately. Voldemort. He who had taken Lily from me all these Years ago. And now he was standing there grinning as he rose his Wand and pointed it at Harry. I wanted to shout, to scream, to push him out of the way. But it was no use helpless as I've always been I watched as Voldemort spoke the words and Harry's Life vanished in a flash of Green Light.

With a muffled scream Severus jerked awake. He was panting and his Heart was beating frantically.

Lilys and Harry's face were still burning in his field of vision and he did not have the strength to suppress the Tears streaming down his cheeks.

The next morning, Severus felt horrible. He hadn't been able to go back to sleep after that for a long time, and the man glaring back at him from the mirror seemed to say: Merlin, you are getting old.

For a second he wondered if he should ask Albus for a Day of, but then he shook his Head. He had not sunken so far that he would submit to letting Dreams rule his Behaviour.

So he took a little flask out of a closet above the washing basin and opend it. A foul stench reached his Nose. "Bon appetite..." he murmured and with one big gulp tossed it down at once. It tasted even worse then it smelled but it certainly got the Job done. He looked his normal grumpy, if slightly disgusted self, and he would have no Problems scaring any pupils who dared coming in the way of the "old bat" as they called him.