If there's One Thing

By SacredLimo417

[[[Well, perfect Blair has definitely found the one thing she isn't so good at. CB. [Bart has not kicked the bucket just yet. ] Takes place after Pret-A-Poor-J.]]]]

If there's one thing Blair Waldorf is absolutely horrible at, it's being away from Chuck Bass.

Two years ago she would have been just fine with it. Then they were just close friends, and her heart didn't rip itself apart bit by bit when they were apart.

That is no longer true, at all.

She wasn't expecting it to be this difficult. They'd both agreed. They would wait until the future to be together. They just weren't ready. She'd agreed.

Who was she kidding?

She didn't agree with a word he was saying. She knew Chuck Bass, however, and she knew he wasn't budging. She was already so broken, and she didn't think she could put up any more of a fight that evening. So, she accepted his sweet, trembling, heart-wrenching goodbye kiss and fought off a breakdown the best she could. This would change eventually, the game between them. It had to. They'd already told each other how they felt multiple times, only not in so many words. She wasn't even attempting to hide it anymore. If Dan Humphrey could see how she felt about Chuck, then anyone could.

It was one month later and she was sitting alone in the corner of the library, once again attempting "As You like It". She needed an excuse to get away from Serena. It seemed all she wanted to do was talk about artsy Aaron, as if Blair didn't hear enough about him from Cyrus. Blair had never told Serena what exactly happened with Chuck that night, but she'd sensed it wasn't good. She didn't want to talk about it, because talking about made her feel a million times more miserable than she already was. It got harder by the second, pretending she was okay. Avoiding the Van der Bass home completely. Watching other sickening couples cuddling in class. Trying her best not to look out for the Bass limo on its way to St. Judes. She didn't want to deal with the fact that she'd finally been ready, finally was about to take a risk for the first time in her life, and it all crashed in front of her.

As she contemplated whether or not "Whither wander you" meant "where are you going", she spotted Serena.

Damn, she thought hopelessly, I knew she'd notice I was missing once she got off the phone with Aaron.

Blair felt bad for avoiding Serena, she really did. It was just so difficult, because when Serena wasn't talking about Aaron, she was not-so-nonchalantly trying to get Blair to admit her Chuck problems.

"B! Where have you been? I've been looking everywhere for you! And why did you pay that freshman to say you went home sick?"

Blair sighed. Really, for $20, little Kelsey should have come up with a more elaborate lie.

"Sorry, S. I just really needed to get some…reading in. When AP Literature calls, Blair Waldorf must reluctantly answer, you know?"

Serena stared down at her, worried. She slid down the back of the bookcase and sat, with criss-crossed legs, right next to her best friend.

"B, I'm not going lie. I've been really worried about you lately. And with Chuck sulking around the condo lately, I can't help but wonder if there is some kind of connection you're not telling me about."

Blair looked down at her lap, gently began to fiddle with the hem of her Marc Jacobs skirt, and said quietly, "There is no correlation, Serena."

Serena shook her head disapprovingly, and sighed.

"You can tell me Blair, really. I wished you would just share it with me. I know it's big, and I don't like seeing you so broken."

So now it was obvious to the world that she was broken? Well she was breaking, anyway, missing him more and more every single day. She was sure if she didn't see him soon, she'd be broken beyond repair. She hated the fact that Blair Waldorf let Chuck Bass have the final say in their relationship.

But she didn't want to talk about it, of course. She was absolutely, positively, just fine without him in her life. If she never said anything out loud, then nothing was really happening.

"There is nothing going on, S. No extreme crisis, no mental breakdown, no anything! I'm fine."

Serena really wished Blair would trust her, but she knew it was not in her nature.

"Then why did drunk-Chuck mention some kind of "big mistake" he made about you, B? Hmm?"

If there's one thing Blair Waldorf is horrible at, it's lying to Serena Van der Woodsen.

Chuck was drinking? Well, Chuck was always drinking, but Chuck was drinking to drown his Blair- sorrows? And then spewing classified information to Serena? What is the world coming to?

Blair continued playing with that hem, but Serena noticed a single tear finding its way down her cheek.

Maybe she should talk about it.

"Maybe…maybe something did happen."

"What did he say to you, B? Because whatever it is, it's been tearing him up."

"Well…after that whole Brooklyn incident, he came over. He basically said even though we…feel the same way about each other, we wouldn't ever work as a stable couple. He doesn't want to be together."

Blair will deny, deny, deny this later, but the word "together" came out as a sob. She probably shouldn't have stayed so bottled up for so long. Typical.

"Aww, B. You know he's just scared. He doesn't mean any of that. He's Chuck Bass, and he's never been in love before. He's just scared he will hurt you."

"Doesn't he know the only way to hurt me is not to give us a chance?"

A few more tears slid down, and she hid her face in her hands.

"He's definitely regretting it, Blair."

She sobbed again and Serena took her in her arms.

"Shh, B. It's gonna be okay. I just wish you had come to me when you knew you needed to talk."

She sobbed some more into her shoulder, fully aware of all the camera phones pointed in their direction. She didn't even care anymore; she just wanted to feel better. She wanted Serena to help her get the damn metaphoric anvil off her chest. It was crushing her.

"I just…felt so awful…thinking about him makes it…so much worse."

Serena hugged her tighter, and knew she'd be after Chuck next.

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Of the many things Chuck Bass is horrible at, he's the worst at being away from Blair Waldorf.

He felt so stupid, missing her like this. He was the one that said they couldn't work. He was the one that wanted to wait. And now, he was the one regretting it.

He was afraid to admit it, but he'd made a mistake. He was just scared. Scared he would mess things up, hurt her, and the both of them would end up broken. Soon after, he realized how bad of a decision it was. Sure, he was scared, but he also knew the truth. He was in love with her and, obviously, it would be difficult to be apart. He should have just risked it, like he risked everything else in his life. But he knew he'd never be able to risk Blair, because Blair was never like everything else.

She was special. She was his.

Well, she could have been his. He'd ruined his chance.

He felt it. Every day, every minute, he felt the effects of being away from his Blair. He was losing it. It was bad when he was alone; it was worse when he saw her.

Her perfect brown curls flowed down her back, and her red tights and commanding voice demanded attention. She kept her followers in check, but she doubted herself. One of the reasons he'd fallen so hard for her was because, even though she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, she was still self-conscious.

She doubted herself, like she couldn't see it; like she didn't realize that she was perfect.

She swished past him, coaching one of her minions on how to gain a teachers respect. He caught a whiff of her vanilla shampoo, and all he wanted to do was bury his fingers in her hair.

Yes, that's exactly what he needed right now. To bury his fingers in Blair Waldorf's chocolate curls, kiss her like his life depended on it (it kind of does), and pretend this whole nightmare never even happened.

For one of the first times in his life, Chuck Bass is feeling regret.

A few weeks later, Serena began to interrogate him every time she spotted him.

"So what's going on with you? You seem so weird lately. You haven't dropped any sexual innuendos at breakfast or anything."

Chuck lowered the paper he was reading, and glanced at her curiously.

"You know the word "innuendos"?"

"Urgh, Chuck. So not the point. I just want to know what's going on with you."

"Nothing is wrong, Sis. I've simply grown tired of the whole "hitting on your stepsister" act. I've moved on."

"Chuck, listen. I overheard you the other night, when you got back from drinking."

Deny, Bass. Deny, deny, deny.

"What are you talking about, Serena?"

"I heard you talking about Blair. You said you made some kind of huge mistake. What did you do?"

His heart dropped to the floor, and he struggled to keep his usually permanent cool.

"I did nothing. I was probably talking about how I should have commented on her legs more the last time I saw her."

"BS, Chuck. I talked to Blair, okay. She could barely even talk to me about it. We're best friends, and you hurt her so much she couldn't even talk to me about it. What the hell is wrong with you?"

He slammed his paper on the table, transferring all his embarrassment and hurt into pure anger.

"What are you doing, butting into our relationship, anyway, Serena? Who asked you? This is between Blair and me, no one else! Why don't you just put all your energy into your crumbling relationship, because it's clear as day to everyone on the Upper East Side that Aaron is sleeping with each and every one of those " models" he spends all his time with!"

Serena takes a step back, genuinely hurt. She tried her best to swallow the pain, just for a moment, and remember she was doing this for Blair.

"Why won't you just admit that what you said to Blair is eating you up inside?"

He sighed angrily, and moved right in front of Serena's face. He didn't want her missing this.

"It is, okay? It is! Is this what it's going to take to get you out of my space? Fine. I made a mistake. I miss Blair, and I shouldn't have told her our relationship wouldn't work. I hate being away from her. I'm in love with her. There isn't and will never be anyone else. There. Will you leave now?!"

"Gladly."

Chuck watched her glide out of the room and realized the big, black, hellish hole he'd just dug himself into.

What do you think? There will be a new chapter pretty soon.

R&R!

Thank you soo much!

SacredLimo417