Author's Note

This is something I originally posted on tumblr, and thought I should finally post on here too. If you're interested, my tumblr is quiddityofstars and I'm open to prompts, suggestions or any questions and comments.
As much as I enjoyed this episode of Doctor Who and as much as I enjoyed the ending, this idea came into my head and I had to get it out. Spoilers for Doctor Who Series 11, up to and including Episode 9, and some of the dialogue is taken directly from the episode, so credit to the writers, of course.


The room tilted and there was a flash and all the Doctor could see was bright white. Then… Was that the sound of a stream in the distance? And a slight breeze. And that smell… Flowers? It all seemed so familiar somehow…

Then the light began to dim to a soft golden glow and she could slowly begin to make out her surroundings. She appeared to be standing in a field of golden grass, the sky a bright blue above her, a perfect day for… for a wedding…

The Punjab! Prem… The Doctor felt her hearts clench in sadness, which is when she heard the grass shift behind her, she turned and stood there, smiling softly, was Yaz.

"Doctor." Her companion said the title joyfully, as if happy to be reunited with her again.

As happy as she was to see Yaz, the Doctor frowned slightly, unable to make sense of the situation. "I don't understand… The Solitract… It threw you out."

"I came back for you."

The Doctor tilted her head and watched the figure opposite her for a moment. No, that didn't add up. "No… I can believe that Yaz might try to come back for me, but I don't believe you'd let her back in. You were over capacity, you're only stable again now because it's just you and me. So why are you taking the appearance of my friend? You don't need to convince me to stay… Do you?"

"Well, you sacrificed yourself to save both universes, I thought in return I would be something that you like." The Yaz that was really a universe that was a consciousness turned and sat down at a small garden table that suddenly perched perfectly amongst the long grass. The Doctor slowly followed and sat down opposite her. "Now, please, tell me of your universe."

The Doctor looked into the eyes of the woman before her and saw the same eager, fascinated look that Yaz always had when she learnt something new about the universe. The same look she'd had when she'd realised that they'd just met Rosa Parks. The same look she'd had when the Doctor had revealed she'd had a grandmother.

"You think words can do it justice?" She asked softly, reaching out to gently hold the Yaz-but-not-really-Yaz's hands over the table. "It's really big, and incredibly beautiful." She paused as something began to slowly sink in. "And apparently I've just said goodbye to it."

She looked at the mirror girl sitting opposite her. "But the thing I'm going to miss the most is the people. My friends."

"I am your friend," said Yaz's sweet voice.

"I know." Said the Doctor, and then realised something else as she looked at their joined hands, hers beginning to shimmer unsteadily. She understood now why the Solitract had chosen to appear as Yaz. It would be hard enough to say goodbye to this endlessly fascinating, brilliant new thing, to leave it alone without a hand to hold. It would be even harder to do that when it was wearing the face of the brilliant, brave Yasmin Khan. She never wanted to say goodbye to her, which was terrifying because someday she would probably have to. Humans. They could live long and fruitful lives and still not live long enough. They could be so strong and so fragile. She could never, would never stop loving them. "And as your friend, I should point out you're not in control of this."

Mirror Yaz shook her head. "This is my place. I control everything here."

"Then you can see that this place is still destabilising. Me being here is going to kill us both." She forced herself to look into the eyes of her friend even though it hurt. "You may want us to be together but it's not working. It will never work."

The universe now had that stubborn look that Yaz had worn earlier when she'd stated, not asked, stated, I'm coming with you. She hadn't been able to refuse her then. She'd have to now. "You're lying to me because you want to leave."

"No. I'm your friend, and friends help each other face up to their problems, not avoid them. You are the maddest and most beautiful thing I have ever experienced, and I haven't even scratched the surface yet. I wish I could stay," and she meant it, she really did, "but if either of us are going to survive this, you're going to have to let me go and keep on being brilliant by yourself."

"I miss you." Yaz's voice broke with emotion and the Doctor almost launched herself across the table to hold her and never let her go. "I miss it all, so much."

The Doctor understood that very well, there were so many things she missed about her universe, even when she existed in it. She let go of one of her hands to reach up and gently brush away a tear that had fallen down Yaz's cheek. Her thumb lingered on the soft skin of her face, beautiful in the golden light of the sun. Always beautiful. "I know, but if you do this, I promise you and I will be friends forever. You have to let me go."

The universe sighed and leaned into the touch of the fingers of her cheek, then nodded, meeting the Doctor's eyes, her own soft and sad, but bright. "I will dream of you, out there."

The Doctor stood, leaning back down to press a kiss to the forehead of her friend, and giving her a bittersweet smile before walking back into the light.

And then she found herself stumbling back out through the portal and into the anti-zone. But there were arms there to catch her.

"Doctor!"

"Yaz?"

"The others are ahead, they've found the way out, I came back for you to make sure you got out, come on!" Yaz took the Doctor's hand and suddenly they were running.

The Doctor smiled at the woman next to her as they ran.

Brilliant Yaz.