"I sat alone in bed till the morning

I'm crying, 'they're coming for me'

And I tried to hide these secrets inside me

my mind's like a deadly disease" - Control, Halsey


It was rather odd, Merlin thought, that Morgana had changed so quickly. How she had gone from so passionate and kind to cold and cruel in so little time.
As the spirit consumed him and he screamed for Morgana to run, run as fast as she could and warn Arthur, he wondered how he'd never thought of it before.


It was another one of those days.
He was late to wake Arthur as usual, as punishment Arthur had given him even more chores than a regular man should be able to complete in a day as usual, and whenever he had a spare moment (which he didn't) Gaius was roping him into doing some task or other- cleaning the leech tank, gathering herbs, making deliveries- as usual, and he had no doubt that before the day was out he'd be running around risking his life with his eyes flashing that glorious molten gold just to 'save Camelot' and 'fulfil his destiny' as usual.
Sometimes he wondered if one day he'd just collapse from exhaustion. Would they go easy on him then?
He doubted it.

But currently the manservant was darting through the hustle and bustle of Camelot, avoiding baskets swinging on arms and stray fruit rolling along the cobbles of the street. He edged around a large figure of a woman as she inspected a merchant's wares, and narrowly avoided being trampled by a horse, but as he pushed through the crowd who were making their way across the bridge, he felt his heart lift.
The forest.
He practically ran to the edge of the trees. He felt his magic come alive, all his senses heightening as he slowly loosened his careful hold on his powers.
The invisible tendrils of power burst out to inspect his surroundings, joyful at being allowed to run wild even after only a day of being out of use. They found nothing unusual as they twisted and turned through the wood, only brushing against auras of wood nymphs, mice, and the occasional rabbit.

Merlin felt himself relax properly for the first time in days.
This was probably the main reason he put up with Gaius' chores as well as Arthur's (other than his huge respect for the old physician)- these rare moments where he was given time to venture alone into the woods in the search for herbs and he could let his powers run wild.
Sure, in the castle and on quests he used the odd spell to cause branches to fall on bandits' heads, save his prattish friend's life, or simply complete his chores on time (much to Gaius' disapproval), but he always had to be so careful. Ever since the Witchfinder Incident he had tightened his hold on his magic considerably, quelling the instincts that bubbled up inside him.
Stop.
Move.
Slow.

In Camelot, he couldn't afford to slip up.
Pitchers couldn't slide unassisted towards nobles, falling trays full of food couldn't stop in midair, and whatever happened, eyes could NEVER flash gold.

But out here? Out here in this part of the wood where patrols rarely galloped, where few bandits ventured, and where no citizens went?
Here he was safe to let it roam.

/

It was a good few hours later when Merlin realised how long he'd been gone. He was so swept up in the euphoria of allowing his magic to run free he'd lost track of time.
He squinted up at the sky to try and gain some sort of idea of the time by the sun's position, but it had vanished among leaves.
"Great." He muttered.
The warlock checked his basket.
He was three plants short and from what little he could see of the sun, very, very late.
"Now Arthur AND Gaius are going to kill me..."

He slowly headed off into a nearby clearing, searching near the roots of the trees for the plants the physician had asked for.
It was a few minutes before he realised his magic hadn't picked up any sort of disturbance for a while.
And it was then that he felt the firm, icy grip of a certain hand around his ankle.
Slowly, slowly, he looked down to the cruel grin of the woman he'd once respected so much.
Morgana let out a slow, rattling breath, lips flecked with blood.
"Well then. Fancy finding you here, Merlin."

He swallowed.

"Morgana."