A/N: Blame Wordsplat, she got me reading Avengers fan fiction and now it won't leave me alone... That and getting the film on Blu-ray. I'm hopelessly obsessed with the science bro's because they are just so damned awesome. And yes I'm aware this particular scenario has been done to death, but I just couldn't resist.
Disclaimer: I own nothing; I'm just messing around with these guys.
Warnings: Rated for a bit of potty-mouth.
FOR SCIENCE!
Covered.
Bruce Banner considered himself to be a realist.
A life full of hardship, sorrow and regret had taught him cruel lessons (some of which his mind still refused to learn) which had pushed his sanity to the brink and back and that was even before you took the 'Other Guy' into consideration.
Which at the moment he wasn't because that opened up a whole other can of worms.
But back to the point at hand.
His less than peachy life had drummed several things deep into his psyche; the most prevalent at this precise moment being 'Nothing good ever lasts.' Admittedly this was a somewhat pessimistic view on life but it was one that had proven itself true on many an occasion regardless of what he did to try and prevent it.
That was why he knew that this couldn't last.
This being the Avengers.
Well him being a part of it at the least.
Sooner or later (and believe it or not Bruce really was actually hoping it would be later, he'd actually gotten somewhat attached to the crazy bastards) something was going to come along and burst the little bubble of relative normality that he had surrounded himself with. He could only hope that it wasn't a particularly violent explosion and that his 'team mates' were very, very far away when it happened because he didn't feel like having yet more death on his conscience. It was already weighed down far too much.
So for the moment Banner was enjoying the perks of this normality while it lasted. Stark⦠Tony hadn't been kidding when he'd said that his R & D department was a candyland. Bruce had never seen such an expansive or expensive set of labs in all his life; he had all the toys and even a few things that the physicist hadn't even heard of never mind seen in the flesh. It truly was his nerd nirvana.
Tony of course had been outrageously smug about his reaction and had immediately demanded that they 'stop wasting time and get some science done.' And Bruce had merely rolled his eyes and his sleeves and set to it, a small smile on his face.
Of course there were a few pitfalls to this new lifestyle and they generally came in the form of S.H.I.E.L.D meetings and other such logistical bullshit but overall it wasn't a bad setup.
Speaking of S.H.I.E.L.D meetings, one was due to start in ten minutes or so JARVIS had told him.
Setting aside the cultures he'd been working on Bruce turned to his lab partner and coughed, very obviously. Tony, being Tony and hating the meetings as much as Bruce did made no notice of the noise and continued to fiddle with the holographic panels spread out before him.
Banner rolled his eyes.
"Tony." He barked, voice more of a growl.
That got the billionaire's attention and his head shot around instantly and he shot the annoyed looking physicist a grin as if he hadn't been blatantly ignoring him.
"What is it big guy?"
Bruce resisted the urge to slap a hand to his forehead, it was a bit too drama queen for his tastes and merely narrowed his eyes at the other man.
"We have a meeting, with Fury, in ten minutes..."
Tony waved his hand dramatically.
"Can't we just cancel? I really can't be dealing with the Cyclops and his minions today."
Bruce stifled a laugh and attempted to remain serious.
"Unfortunately no."
The fake pout on the engineer's lips had little effect on the reserved doctor and after a few minutes Tony sighed resignedly, shutting down the hologram.
"You're worse than Pepper, making me act all responsible."
The sulky tone was obvious and this time Bruce couldn't quite hide the derisive snort of laughter.
"Aw, such a tragedy." He replied sarcastically.
Yes. He really would miss this.
-IAmALineBreakBecauseICantEdi t-
The elevator ride from the labs was pleasant but uneventful, the banter between the two men flowing easily but all too soon they reached the conference hall. The elevator pinged to a halt and Tony with his usual gusto and 'later losers' attitude strode out full of his usual bravado. Bruce followed behind somewhat lost in his thoughts and didn't notice the other man abruptly coming to a halt in front of him until he'd already collided into Stark's back.
"Tony what the...?"
He was cut off by a growl from the billionaire and he immediately fell silent, taking in the angry body language and the way that Tony was trying to shield him from view.
"Ah Mr. Stark."
That voice made Bruce's blood run article cold.
General Thaddeus Ross.
The physicist tried to shrink back into the elevator but the doors had already closed behind him. Trying to control the hunted feeling roaring through his body Bruce took a deep, shuddering breath blinking away the hint of green in his vision.
"I'd ask what the fuck you're doing here Ross but I'm really not interested. I want you out of my home right fucking now."
Tony's voice was ice cold and held a steely, dangerous tone that dropped the temperature of the room several degrees. Ross however seemed completely unfazed by Stark's reply and smiled, although it didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Now, now Stark that's not very nice. I would have thought you'd be more welcoming than that."
Dark eyes narrowed.
"Cut the shit Ross we all know why you're here and you already know my answer."
The General seemed to seriously consider Tony for about a second and then the smile dropped from his face, his whole demeanor changing in an instant. Bruce felt his heart speed up and stood frozen on the spot watching with the morbid fascination of a small child seeing an ant burn beneath a magnifying glass.
"You might want to watch your words Stark; you wouldn't want people thinking you were a traitor to your country now would we?"
This situation was starting to spiral out of control and the physicist didn't know how much longer he could keep a lid on the 'Other Guy.' He could feel him bristling beneath his skin displeased at Ross's untimely appearance and the disrespectful way he was talking to his friend. Tony however brushed off the comment with practiced ease, his eyes still boring holes into his uninvited guest's skull.
"And attempting to kidnap a national hero isn't traitorous at all..."
There was no attempt to veil the sarcasm in his voice and Ross visibly flinched for all of a second before slipping back into his professional facade.
"That beast is no hero Stark you were merely lucky he found something larger to destroy, quite impressive considering your ego was in the equation."
The billionaire ignored the insult and folded his arms across his chest.
"Bullshit!"
"I beg your pardon?" The General's eyebrows shot up.
"You heard me Ross, I call bullshit... You have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. Firstly the Hulk is not a beast as you rather rudely put it, he is a sentient being with thoughts and feelings same as you and me, admittedly a bit more primitive but they're still there."
Tony was getting into full on rant mode and Banner could only watch in slack jawed shock as the Anthony Howard Stark defended the 'Other Guy' to the hilt.
"Secondly Hulk saved my goddamned life, not once, but twice which puts him in a very select group of people I owe and even if I didn't owe him I'd still tell you to fuck off in a heartbeat. He is not some fucking experiment for you to test on..."
Ross had gone very red in the face and his hand was twitching toward the firearm at his side.
"And thirdly Bruce Banner the man you tortured and hunted across half the world put himself at great personal risk to help find an object of untold power and destruction. He also happens to be a close personal friend of mine and I take great offence when people close to me are threatened. Especially when they are as brilliant and as good as Bruce. So tell me Ross who is the real monster here?"
Time seemed to slow as the General drew the gun from his holster and pointed it squarely at Tony, the billionaire apparently having snapped his last nerve.
"You are a fool, you think I'll give up because of some pretty words when I can just easily get rid of you and take what I want?!"
Bruce saw green flare wildly in his vision and heard the roar of the 'Other Guy' pounding in his ears, he fought to control his breathing trying to offset the transformation for as long as possible because he knew as soon as Hulk came out to play things would get messy. He placed a shaking hand on Tony's arm to try and warn his friend and the dark head briefly turned in his direction.
"Tony... You don't have to do this..."
Hard eyes momentarily softened.
"Yes Bruce... I do."
He turned back to the general staring down the barrel of the gun as if it were a harmless water pistol.
"Go on then Ross. I dare you..."
"TONY!"
Ross pulled back the safety.
"General Ross don't do this, it's an idiot move..."
Bruce pleaded with the other man; he was about to go on and say that Tony wasn't the one he really wanted and that if he wanted to shoot someone it should be him but he was prevented by another voice joining the conversation.
"I'm inclined to agree with Doctor Banner that would be a stupid-ass move Ross."
Three heads swiveled as one toward the staircase where an extremely pissed off looking Nick Fury stood, flanked by the remaining Avengers. Ross didn't drop the gun and merely sneered at the small group.
"Director Fury, how good to see you again."
"Wish I could say it was mutual Ross. Now would you kindly explain why the fuck you are pointing a gun at two of my team?"
Bruce couldn't repress the flicker of relief at those words, he'd been partially convinced that Fury would have been all to happy to hand him over to Ross. Apparently he had been wrong.
"This is out of you jurisdiction Fury so stand down."
"How about fuck no and you answer my question."
Fury looked absolutely livid and the rest of the team weren't far behind. Ross, finally realizing that he was vastly outnumbered dropped the pistol mouth drawn into a thin line.
"I don't have explain myself Fury, especially not to you and your freaks."
Here Tony let out a bark of laughter.
"I prefer abnormally awesome to freaks thank you very much and since old Thunderbolt won't fill you in on the details I'll do it for you. He came to try and take Bruce, emphasis on the try, and I, rather politely mind you, told him to fuck off, he can't have my stuff."
There was a collective eye roll from the assembled Avengers before they zeroed in on Ross and if looks could kill the General would have been a charred grisly mess on the floor.
"For once I agree with Stark..." Fury's single eye burned with anger "You're not getting anywhere near Banner, not if I have anything to say about it and especially if these guys have anything to do with it."
Behind the Director the Avengers flexed and tried to look as menacing as possible and Tony just grinned ruthlessly.
"Well I'm glad we're on the same page and now I believe it is time to take out the trash."
Bruce watched in shock as Thor and Steve stepped forward and non too subtly began ushering Ross out of the building, to everyone's immense satisfaction. He was still gaping minutes later when Tony laid a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"Hey there Big Guy, you okay?"
The physicist nodded numbly.
"I... I just... Why?"
The billionaire seemed to understand the unspoken question and grinned cheekily, putting on an awfully fake French accent.
"Because you're worth it?"
Bruce groaned at the terrible quote and shook his head.
"Be serious Tony, he could have shot you!"
"I'm always serious Bruce and he wouldn't have done it."
"You don't know..."
The billionaire moved his hand from Banner's shoulder and pressed it across his mouth, instantly shutting him up.
"He wouldn't have, he's smarter than that..." Tony's face contorted in disgust at the inadvertent compliment "Now can I take my hand away without wanting to crack out a pity party?"
Bruce nodded again and Tony withdrew his hand, wiping it on his cargo pants.
"Thank you."
Stark smiled a genuine smile that lit up his entire face.
"No problem Big Guy, just remember that we've all got you covered."
And for the first time in a long time Bruce actually believed it.
~End~
A/N: Well that sucked... Damn it's a lot harder to write than anime. Sorry if everyone is a bit OOC I'm still getting to grips with the characters.
Smaell out peeps!
