They'd never understand
Lyra has convinced herself of this. No one would ever understand. Sinking into her knees, the girl sat alone in the bed. Marill was out playing with the other Pokemon, leaving her with the company of her own thoughts.
She thought of him. His well-kept hair due. His eyes of many expressions. Usually they were cold and hard, paralyzing anyone who approached. Rarely would they light up and shimmer in joy. She was lucky enough to witness this. They were beautiful. Even more rare was when he cried, tears sliding down like rainwater on her bedroom window. She thought of his attitude. Often guarded, though sometimes sweet. Lyra remembered his moments of kindness. Rigid and shy, stubbornly trying to find a way to keep his pride in tact. She felt lucky to witness so many sides of this boy, when no one else ever seems to.
Maybe that's how she fell for him.
Not that how it happened mattered. It doesn't change anything. It doesn't change other peoples minds. It doesn't change the facts. That he's a criminal. A thief. A predator. He's the person who stole from the professor. He stole that Totodile from right under her nose. She was there. It doesn't change how cruelly he treats his Pokemon; putting them down for the simplest of things. It doesn't change that he stole what would've been Kris' starter. It doesn't change the grudges and animosity. It doesn't change how wrong it feels.
No one would ever understand, Lyra was very sure of this. "I can't tell them" she chocked out in between sobs that she didn't know where there. "I just can't" Lyra could only imagine the reactions. Ethan would have a look of disbelief. He would try to convince her otherwise. Kris would yell and scream at her, hot angry tears pouring down her face. The Professor would be disappointed in his assistant. If lucky, he'd ban her from leaving town ever again, keep her from ever encountering him again. Either that or he'd straight up fire her. Her father would throw a huge fit over it. Maybe her Grandparents would even join the party. No one could possibly ever understand.
Understand why she'd tear down every wanted poster she'd encounter. Why she'd go shopping in the PokeMart just for him. No one would understand how happy she feels just by seeing him. The warm feeling Lyra gets whenever she greets him in sing song. The feeling she gets whenever she hugs Silver, just to see him stutter and blush as his pride begins to crumble. How cute she thought he looked trying desperately to keep a poker face. No one would understand why she goes through the trouble of bandaging his hand whenever his knuckles started to bleed from punching the wall. Or the way her heart pounded that time he loaned her his coat when it was cold out. That she, Professor Elm's loyal assistant, had fallen so hard for a thief.
"*hic*, it's stupid. It's just so stupid" Lyra sobbed. Even if they didn't understand, she knew perfectly why they wouldn't. He's a criminal. No matter how you slice and dice it, that's what he is. He stole from the Professor. Falling for the thief was like betrayal. Like her position as the Professor's assistant meant nothing. It was like betrayal for Kris, who holds a grudge against Silver to this very day. Betrayal to Ethan, after all the trouble he went through to bring him down a peg. Betrayal to her family, whom she promised she would be just fine.
It's like that Fairy Tale. Little Red Riding Hood? Where the girl meets a Mightyena on the way to her Grandmother's house? Despite all warnings, the girl was foolish enough to fall for the Mightyena's tricks, and got eaten in the end. It's just like that. And she knows it. Lyra knows she's making a mistake. She never meant for this to happen. Like Little Red, she just wanted to get the job done. She knew Silver was bad news, yet she fell for him anyway. It's foolish and stupid. And it'll probably cost her in the end. She doesn't know what that price will be, and that only scared Lyra more.
She can't tell anyone. Even her Pokemon are left in the dark. This is her burden to carry. Her burden to get through. All alone. By herself. If it meant keeping the collateral damage to a minimum, then it was worth it. Her loyalties would swing on that pendulum. Going back and forth between Silver and Elm, she'd swing alone. It hurts, but that's just how it is.
She loves him. No one could ever understand that. She barely understands it.
