A.N- ...yes, this story is silly. Very silly. I have a great love for the improv show "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" where they play the Irish Drinking Song game. I would suggest (just for the sake of being familiar with the music and beat of the song) that readers look up the show on YouTube. Because all lyrics are improvised with the last word of the second and fourth singer rhyming, its usually fun and unexpected. While watching one a few months ago, I was struck by the idea of what an Inception themed Irish Drinking Song would sound like. And, then this happened after I sang the first stanza over and over for a week. This is the finished result!

Disclaimer: I do not own Inception. I do not own it's characters. The song is a personal silly creation, my own version of an Inception drinking song. Enjoy!

The Inception Drinking Song

They were drunk. They were terribly, fantastically drunk. But it was all for a good cause. Huddled together in a small booth, the team that completed the first inception (sans "tourist" Saito and the victorious Dominic Cobb) required lots and lots of alcohol.

So they went to a bar get it. And then they drank it. And after a little bit of time basking in the glow of their achievement and their collective buzz, Eames looked around the dark but merry Irish bar they had stumbled into an hour ago, and had a brilliant idea.

He turned to the person seated closest to him and smiled.

"Want to sing a song with me, darling?" Eames asked, priding himself in not slurring too much, as he rested his chin on Arthur's shoulder so he could look at the Point Man's face and enjoy the man's cologne- he smiled to himself, thinking: If I'm ever required to forge a darling Arthur, I will smell lovely.

He was so caught up in this notion that he didn't catch the soft smile the other man sent his way before chuckling to himself.

"And what would I sing with you, Mr. Eames." Arthur raised an eyebrow and gestured to both Ariadne and Yusuf who were still seated with them. Yusuf, who had been trying to get the attention of the bartender, looked over at them immediately. He grinned and said, "Song? In an Irish bar? There is only one song we can sing here."

Ariadne placed her drink on the table, and shook her head. "What, now that we beat inception we have to sing a drinking song?"

Now, Eames hadn't initially thought of this. He just wanted to stay nice and close to Arthur. It was bizarre, but after completing the inception of Robert Fischer, Eames had gotten far closer to a date with Arthur than he had ever gotten before. It was clear that inception was magic!

Because of inception he'd gotten a drink with Arthur (in the company of others), shared a meal with him (did pretzels count?...yes, in this case they did), and when he asked Arthur to sing a song with him, he wasn't immediately told off. All of those things only made Eames believe that if he could get to sing a song with the Point Man, it might lead to sharing a dance, and then a bed, and then maybe the remainder of their lives together, because Eames was a very sappy drunk.

But who cared?

With nothing left to lose, Eames smiled at everyone (but smiled at Arthur most) and made the best yet stupidest suggestion ever.

"I want to sing the Inception Irish Drinking song."

And, because inception was magic and everything was going right for Eames, everyone said yes.


Before they knew what was happening, there was clapping and stomping, and some guy accompanying them on the piano in the corner.

"We completed an inception," Eames began, smiling roguishly at Ariadne and nudging her to pick up the song where he left off.

"Man, wasn't it swell?" she answered him

"We'll go down in history!" Yusuf said, only to be answered by Arthur's vehement, "God this job was hell!"

Holding back his laughter, Eames sang, "It took the best, with some untried."

"Our luck was kind of slim!" Ariadne added brightly.

"Normally I just observe." Yusuf said with a slow shake of his head.

"Zero gravity fight scenes for the win!" Arthur sang before moving into the standard 'Ide-di-de-di!'chorus line of drinking songs.

Ariadne started the next stanza with a loud, "It had never been attempted!"

"Well, not successfully." Yusuf remarked before taking a healthy sip of his drink.

"I said it was impossible." Arthur said, clearly remembering that moment from before.

"What, you're forgetting me?" Eames responded in a scandalized tone of voice.

"Sure you tried," Ariadne said consolingly to Eames, who nodded heavily in response.

"It didn't stick," Yusuf added.

"Like we'll hold that against you…" Arthur muttered, rolling his eyes.

"Now, let's cut to the clock and watch it slowly tick!" Eames said, gaining a few surprised laughs from his team members as he led them in the chorus.

It was Yusuf's turn to start the song over- he began it with a brash "There was danger and projections!"

"The shade of Cobb's dead wife," Arthur added simply.

"Skiing, fighting, and catharsis!" Eames smirked.

"Risking being stuck in Limbo for life!" Ariadne plaintively called back.

"Cobb can go home to his kids." Yusuf added thoughtfully.

Arthur laughed and shook his head. "I can finally take a break!"

Eames's eyes lit up, sing-talking, "Take me along with you, darling?"

Rolling her eyes, Ariadne jumped to take the next line. "Just agree for godsake!"

Prim Arthur, slightly flushed from the alcohol and the turn this Irish drinking song was taking, raised his chin an answered defiantly. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"It's not the time to be coy!" Eames reminded Arthur with a pointed look.

"Are you just against endearments?" Ariadne asked curiously, sing-talking, too.

"Maybe they bring him joy?" Yusuf added, answering Ariadne's question with one of his own.

"That's not the truth!" Arthur sang back, getting a little frustrated.

"Its fine, darling- I know you don't think they're funny." Eames responded, earning a small smile from the Point Man.

"Maybe you should try something else?" Ariadne suggested, shooting Yusuf a look- like they had this planned. Like they had developed some sort of a system of signs. The Chemist grinned and prepared to say the final damning line.

"Like, instead of darling call him honey!" Yusuf said before bursting in a fit of laughter.

It was contagious. After they were able to calm down they did finish the song, complete with the big piano finish- calling out together with a final, "Ide-di-de-di!"

After the final notes were struck and the piano player's clever fingers came to a rest, their fellow inebriated bar patrons gave them a round of applause. It didn't matter that a great many of them didn't have an idea what dreamshare was. Entertainment was entertainment!

They were offered a free round of drinks and succeeded at getting a little bit more plastered. It would make this night live on in infamy not only as the night they had completed an inception, but the night they performed an Irish Drinking song, together.

Arthur would normally have been worried about the safety of this, about the information they had revealed. But he didn't seem too upset by this. He was more interested in Eames.

"Don't call me honey," he slurred a little bit, fixing Eames with as serious a look as he could manage. It was a brave attempt.

Eames frowned. "I'm assuming that 'darling' is still on the table." And because it wasn't a secret to Arthur that Eames was a sappy drunk, the Point Man wasn't disturbed at all when Eames grinned and said, "I would love to go on a date with you and call you darling. I'd like to dance with you and live with you and wake up smelling like your cologne…"

Arthur raised an eyebrow at that last part. But, he smiled at the Forger anyway because he no longer had the Dominic Cobb-centric load of responsibility on his shoulders. He was free!

He leaned forwards and said, "I'm gonna take you on vacation with me…"

"Inception is magic." Eames said in response. He then added, "Zero gravity fight scenes for the win!"

Arthur could only nod in agreement. Inception and Irish Drinking songs were very magical. And if the zero gravity fight scene line wasn't magic, it was at least gold.

Eames smiled a little foolishly before pulling the Point Man in for the first of many kisses.