Ch1. The Ultimate Challenge

Fate is a silly little personality, eccentric and fickle in her temperament. So when she was watching from her perch in the Heavens at the events that were taking place in Soul Society and Earth, she got a little annoyed.

One idle afternoon, Fate was sipping her bubble tea when Humor, her favorite muse, stopped by for a chat.

"Do you see those meandering morons?" Fate asked her winged friend.

"Indeed," Humor giggled. "All the power we give those Shinigami, and look what they're doing." It was a statement that was all too real for Fate. War had his fun with humans far too much, and he decided suddenly to strike with the Death Gods as well.

"They have DEATH in their names," he argued over dumplings and rice a few nights before. "And they carry swords. Why not?"

Nobody could dispute. Thus War got his way and was having far too much fun in the glory of his rightness.

Fate sighed. Then she looked interestedly at Humor. Suddenly, an idea popped into her head.

"Say, Humor. I have a glorious scheme!" The two deities discussed, pondered, plotted, and laughed. And finally they came to a conclusion that was a wonderful and twisted proposal.

"War wants to see some fights, eh? Oh, we'll give him fights."

And thus she snapped her fingers, and the ways of the worlds twisted and conformed.

Her plan was set in motion, and none could oppose it.

Ichigo Kurosaki had been through a lot the past few months. Between hollows, talking cats, becoming a Shinigami and his adventures in Soul Society, one could argue that he had seen his fair share of oddness.

So it came as a slight surprise that when he awoke in the middle of nowhere, or more specifically what appeared to be an exotic beach under a tropical sun, he was a little stunned.

"Where the hell am I?" He stared up at the clear blue sky. Last thing he remembered was beating the crap out of Prissy-Prissy Princess.

Or Byakuya, rather.

A groan that came from nearby startled him and he sat up.

What he saw was madness. A few dozen people scattered about on the ground, most of them Shinigami, and all of them except for himself were out cold. He recognized a few. More scanning revealed his friends.

Horror struck when he saw his father.

He knew then this was no ordinary hallucination.

Something… was very, very wrong.

The groan came from Ishida, who was a few feet away, his face buried in sand. Ichigo scurried over and shook him.

"Ishida…oi, ISHIDA!" Slowly, the other young man's eyes opened.

"Father, I'm sorry I failed you…" Ishida tilted his head to the side and proceeded to fall back asleep. Ichigo was extremely angered by this and so he slapped Ishida across the face.

"WAKE UP, DAMMIT!"

It worked.

The poor kid woke with a start.

"Ngg…what?"

"We're in trouble, I think," Ichigo told him.

"What?" Ishida sat up and looked around. Indeed, it was a strange situation. People were starting to stir, and it was a mix of enemies and allies and unknowns alike.

"What are we going to do?" the red head exclaimed.

"Let's gather everyone and leave."

"And go where?"

"Oii… what…where am I?" Ichigo turned to see a young boy with short, spiky hair lift himself off the ground. Beyond him more movement spread as people continued to wake up.

"Ken-chan! Where are you?" a high pitched pink-haired girl said looking around.

"This isn't my office…" came a young woman with her hair tied back.

Ichigo scrambled to his feet and tried to find the rest of his gang. Chad was at least a few bodies away, apparently wide-awake and Orihime was still out lying next to a blonde woman with equally large breasts.

"YOU! INTRUDERS!" A small feisty girl with short hair was giving him dagger glares.

Oh shit, he thought.

Luckily, the spreading confusion was enough of a distraction to keep her at bay.

"Where are we?"

"What's going on?"

"AIZEN? You're ALIVE?"

All out madness broke out after that. Not that Ichigo knew or even cared why. He grabbed Ishida and ran over to Orihime who was just starting to come to. Chad joined them.

"Let's get out of here," Ishida commanded, having to raise his voice over the commotion.

As the foursome scrambled on their feet, much to Ichigo's surprise and relief, a pint-sized familiar was in the midst. He grabbed Rukia with one arm (which wasn't too hard) and they continued to run away.

Then a bolt of lighting came accompanied by a glorious clap of thunder. Everyone was silenced.

"Hello my minions," came a voice from beyond. "Welcome to your destiny…" Everybody looked around confused and started up again.

"Who is that?" Matsumoto asked eyeing the clouds.

"COME OUT AND FIGHT ME!" Zaraki hollered while swinging his sword wildly through the air.

"She sounds hot…" Shunsui commented. He got swift wack in the head from his lovely vice.

Fate twitched.

"SILENCE FOOLS!" She finally materialized in front of them, looking temperamental but beautiful with long flowing blue hair, sea-green eyes, and an Elvis Presley t-shirt.

"Who the hell are you?" Soi Fong hissed. "And what's going on? Where is Seireitei?"

"I'm glad you asked. I, my dears, am Fate. And I'm here to let you know that you're going to be part of a wonderful game to amuse the gods."

Everyone looked at her like she was Bill Gates in drag.

"You'll be split into 3 teams and separated across this island. The first phase is all out elimination. Each team will have a set amount of people and that number must get down to ten, but you cannot eliminate people from your own team. Do you see that tower up there?" She pointed to what they all assumed to be the center of the Island, which was a small mountain. "You have 3 days to reach that tower. Obviously, as you get closer you'll run into more and more people. Once at the tower, you'll meet the hosts and the teams will be finalized. If any team has more than ten people, there will be a challenge to get rid of some people… lesse." The woman scanned over a sheet of paper which, they assumed, was her outline. "OH yeah, you'll all be in School Uniforms! Any questions?"

"Are you serious?" came Hitsugaya.

"Yes."

"Can I kill you?" Kenpachi asked quite sincerely.

"No."

Silence spread across the group. Fate nodded contently.

"So it shall be!" She clapped her hands and everyone was sent across the island, scattered and spread. "Let the games begin," she said humorously, a giant smirk plastered to her perfectly sculpted face.

Of course, she was the only one smiling.


Episode 2 Preview: The teams start gathering, the first alliances, betrayals, and eliminations. GASP. Who will be the losers who go first?

Find out next time on…. SOUL SURVIVOR ROYALE.


Buahahahahaha. Well then, I'm here with this crazy story. NO fandom is safe from me…kukukuku.

I started writing it a loooonnnnggg time ago so some of the stuff is a little outdated, but being this is pure AU crack, it doesn't matter. I'll make it work. ;;;;;;;

Um..

Yeah, this is sort of weird. As the story goes on, I'll be glad to concider any sort of ideas, suggestions, and requests you guys have for crazy pairings and eliminations.

Right now I'm debating whether to kill people off Battle Royale style or just lock them in a cage until the challenge is over. Hmmm. Maybe some votes on who should go first.

What do you think?

Oh, as a warning, I WILL be brutal to everyone. I don't know who's going to win, either. XD