A/N: Hello fanfiction readers and writers alike, this is a short little snippet of one the stories that I have written and if I get positive feedback then I will continue and post the whole story, if not then I will rewrite my story and make it better. So critical feedback accepted, but please don't be too hard on me I've written some other stories on a different website that didn't turn out so great, so to me this is a fresh start.

The Second Victor

I don't know if I can handle this much longer. I mean I have been doing this for 10 years now but, it just keeps getting harder and harder. Being a mentor to children who will end up dying because of my failure is not something that most people will ever have to do. But I guess I'm just lucky. Ha, what I load of bull-shit. Lucky is not a word I would use to describe myself. It would have been lucky if I had died in the arena. No lucky would have been not getting chosen as a tribute. But better yet lucky would have been not being born at all. Honestly I would have preferred the latter. This is a life that no person should have to live.

Haymitch used to tell me that it gets easier after you find your vice. But I never did find one. Instead I developed a second personality and a world inside my mind that I could disappear into. That is where I like to stay most of the time. It is because of my other self that people think I am crazy, but they don't understand. If I didn't have her then I would be crazy, she is who I become when the pressure gets too much my real self gets locked away with little knowledge of what happens. I have no real control over her. She even has her own name. The meaning of it is completely different to the meaning of my name. She calls herself Khiara it means dark, which is what she is. Whereas I ma weak and can't handle the pressure of teaching a kid how to survive, she relishes it, she has an obsession with seeing how far she can get her tribute go each year. The furtherest we ever got was a tribute to the final 4year, before she was beaten to death by a savage gorilla/human mutt. The only people who know of my condition are: Haymitch, Effie, Cinna and my friends, Joanna, Finnick Odair, Mags and Annie Cresta. When I go to the games each year one of them is always by my side helping me to cope with my disability. They try to sympathise with me, but the only person who really understands what I am going through is Annie. She has a similar problem; the only difference is that she lost control of her other self. Annie let herself be controlled by fear and anxiety, which has only worsened over time. Finnick helps me get back my control once I have lost it. He has had practice what with him being in love with Annie and everything. Joanna helps me to fight against Khiara, she doesn't baby me or tell me that everything will be alright, she treats me they way she would treat any other friend. And Mags, well Mags has always been like the mother I never had, she is the one who sits with me for hours while I draw what goes through my head, she I sthe one who once a month comes to visit me in District 12, she is the one who sits beside my bed while I sleep stroking my hair and calming me down when I wake up screaming. She has always been there for me when I need her, and when I don't need her she is still there.

I'm not very well known as a victor in my district. This is because the year I won was the year that half the tributes froze to death; it was the quickest games in recorded history. But still you would think that people would remember me, I was the youngest ever victor, I won the games when I was 12 years old. Quite the feat I know, I am reminded of this every year that I am in the Capitol. I only won because I grew up on the streets of District 12 and was used to the roughest climate Panem had to offer. I guess the reason people forget about me or just don't like to think about me is because I never leave my house. I can't bring myself to even get out of bed most days, I get just too exhausted from the nightmares of stabbing and screaming and running and hunting and killing and shooting and freezing and children pinning all their hopes for survival on me and failing every year for the past 10 years.

So yeah, this is my life, filled with death, destruction, mental disabilities, duelling personalities and the knowledge that every year I am getting closer to losing my mind for ever.

My name is Lenci Drustoff and this is my story.

A/N: So that is just the rough cut of the first chapter. This story will follow the plot of the three books. Let me know what you think by reviewing.

Toodles for now

Liliana-Odair