Dogs and Dates
Sirius walked into the kitchen, half-asleep and yawning unnecessarily loudly and unflatteringly widely. He stretched his arms above his head and closed his eyes, wishing he could be back in bed. The sweet smell of toast, fried eggs and freshly cooked bacon wafted through the kitchen, making Sirius's eyes snap open and his stomach growled in response. He glanced over at his best friend and flatmate, James, who was wearing Sirius's "very very very gay chef" apron, tossing a pancake with effortless skill and whistling cheerfully to himself.
It was too early in the morning for Sirius to be as happy as James was, so he decided to sit down at the table and wait for James to hand him some food. It was very odd that James was cooking breakfast – usually they settled for Cheerios or last night's leftover kebab that they had been drunkenly longing for but had fallen asleep before they had gotten a chance to eat it. Sirius pulled his chair in under the table, the wood making a loud scraping noise against the black and white tile floor. James turned around at the noise.
'Sirius!' he exclaimed cheerfully, transferring his pancake from the frying pan to a plate. It sat atop a pile of pancakes he'd already cooked. James quickly turned off the cooker and placed the pancakes on the table. 'I've got bacon, eggs and toast if you're interested?'
'I'll have some.' Sirius said tiredly, leaning back in his chair. He wanted to ask what the occasion was – why was James cooking? But he was far too tired and a little hungover, so he settled for sitting quietly in his chair while he waited for James to bring his food over.
James carried over a plate of food and put it down in front of Sirius, and then grabbed his own plate. He poured them both some coffee and then sat down opposite Sirius, sliding a steaming mug towards him.
'Bon appetit!' he said, tucking right into his meal.
Sirius stared at James for a moment. He's acting really weird, Sirius thought. James glanced up at Sirius, noticing his confused expression.
'What?' he asked around a mouthful of food.
'Nothing, nothing,' Sirius replied quickly, grabbing his knife and fork and starting to eat.
They didn't speak much while they ate, but when they were finished, Sirius sighed contently and patted his stomach. 'That was great. Thanks, mate,' he said, grabbing his mug of coffee and finishing it off.
'It's alright,' James replied, placing his knife and fork down on his plate and leaning back in his seat.
'You want me to wash the dishes?' Sirius asked, starting to get up.
'Actually, I want to talk to you about something,' James said. Sirius sat back down and raised his eyebrows at James across the table.
'So that's why you cooked me a nice meal?' Sirius said, eyeing James with suspicion. 'Are you going to ask me to move out or something?'
'No, it's just that this is a very… uh… awkward thing to talk about,' James said, and his tone indicated that he really didn't want to be having this conversation. 'I thought that a meal might… you know… make it easier.'
Sirius didn't know what to think. He just stared at James and shrugged. 'Can't be that bad. Just tell me.'
James sighed and scratched his head awkwardly. 'Okay, so… I couldn't help but notice that… er… when you're Padfoot, you… well… I guess I'll just come right out and say it but… your, uh, general hygiene isn't really up to scratch. Yeah.'
'So I smell?'
'Pretty much.'
Sirius folded his arms. 'I have to disagree. I go out in the rain a lot and-'
'You also have fleas,' James said quickly. 'And,' he said, his face scrunching up in disgust, 'you have these weird bald patches and the fur around them is all crusty and gross.'
'Oh.'
'Yeah, sorry man. I didn't want to bring it up, but… I thought you should know. Maybe you should get it checked.'
'Do you think it could be bad?' Sirius asked, suddenly anxious. 'Like, a disease?'
James shrugged. 'I don't know. It doesn't look nice, though. And you smell like shit. No offense.'
'Offense taken' Sirius snapped, frowning. 'I can't exactly take a bath, though, can I?'
'Do you think there's somewhere we can go to get you checked and… er… bathed… while being discreet and not telling anyone you're an animagus?' James asked.
'No,' Sirius said. 'But Muggles have this place called a "vet's surgery". I only know this because Reg just got a job as a so-called "vet". It's like… a healer but for animals.'
James nearly choked on his coffee. 'Reg? Your brother?'
'What other Reg is there?'
'He's a… a vet?' James asked, ignoring Sirius. 'He looks after animals and makes them better?'
Sirius sighed. James had been in love with Regulus for as long as Sirius could remember, but he'd never really had the courage to do anything about it while they were at Hogwarts. It had taken Sirius a while to come to terms with the fact that his best friend had feelings for his little brother, but at this point he was so used to it that he almost wanted them to get together just to shut James up about it. 'Yes, James,' Sirius said, knowing full well that James was about to spurt some lovesick vomit-inducing crap about how "adorable" Regulus was.
James was grinning. 'That's adorable,' he said. 'He's so caring and sweet.'
'Hm,' Sirius said.
'I think I'll be taking you to the vets to see him,' James said matter-of-factly, getting up and walking towards the mirror. He ran a hand through his hair and messed it up more than it already was, smiling at his reflection. 'Why don't we go now?'
'Hey, hold on a second,' Sirius said, jumping out of his seat. 'I don't want Reg checking me.'
James turned his head towards Sirius. 'Why not? It's not like we'll tell him it's you. And besides, it gives me a chance to talk to him again. It's been so long since I last saw him.'
'You only want to go so you can chat him up,' Sirius accused, folding his arms again. 'I won't do it. I refuse.'
It came as a surprise to Sirius when James just smirked at him. 'Fine then, I'll go and tell Remus that you fancy him.'
Sirius snorted. As if James would do that to him. 'Go right ahead,' he said, calling James's bluff.
James disapparated.
Shit, Sirius thought. 'Wait, come back!' he yelled in panic, knowing that no amount of yelling would help, but still doing it anyway. He was still in his pyjamas and his hair was a total mess, but he found himself apparating without a second thought to the doorstep of Remus's house. There was James, standing by the door with a glimmer of excitement in his eyes.
'You changed your mind?' James asked.
'You didn't even ring the doorbell, did you?' Sirius replied, annoyed.
James smiled. 'I did, actually. So am I taking you to the vet or not?'
Before Sirius could respond, the door opened and Remus appeared, staring between them in confused silence.
'FINE!' Sirius said. His heart was thumping rapidly in his chest, and not just because the most beautiful boy in the word was staring at him, but because James was seconds away from telling that beautiful boy that Sirius was madly in love with him.
'What are you guys doing here so early?' Remus asked, rubbing his eyes. It looked as though they had woken him up.
'Just thought we'd say hi,' Sirius said quickly, flashing a grin at him.
'Yeah, but now we have to go,' James said, smiling at Remus. 'It was nice seeing you though.' He grabbed Sirius's arm and disapparated them both.
'Okay then…' Remus mumbled, looking very confused. 'Thanks for waking me up!' he called as he walked back into the house, although nobody was there anymore to hear him.
James walked into the vet's surgery, pulling Padfoot along on a leash behind him. Padfoot was being very stubborn – for one, he didn't like being on a leash, and he also didn't like the idea of getting "checked".
'It's for the best,' James said to Padfoot. 'You'll thank me later when you're all better.'
Padfoot growled. James walked to the desk and smiled politely at the receptionist. 'Hi,' he said. 'I'd like to get my dog checked. He's going bald and he's starting to smell really bad I believe he may have fleas.'
The receptionist peered over the desk at Padfoot. 'We can fit you in for an appointment in five minutes?'
'That'll be lovely,' James said. 'Will that be with Regulus Black?'
'No, it'll be with Dr Greenfield,' she replied. 'She's very experienced and she's been working here for seven years now. Dr Black is only a newly trained vet, so we can't guarantee the same service.'
'I need to see Regulus Black,' James said. 'He's a friend of mine. Actually, he's my best friend's brother. He'll know who I am if you ask.'
She glanced down at her paperwork. 'Well, Dr Black is in today but he has an appointment with a sick rabbit in five minutes. Let me ask the owner of the animal if they'd be happy for me to swap those appointments over.'
James nodded. 'Thank you.'
She walked across the waiting room to a young woman who was holding a fluffy white bunny on her lap. James waited patiently while Padfoot whined at his feet. The receptionist returned, smiling at him. 'Yes, that'll be fine. So you'll see Dr Black in five minutes. Can I take your pet's name?'
'It's Padfoot.' James said, feeling the excitement bubble in his chest. He was going to see Regulus again! This day was turning out great.
'Please take a seat, and Dr Black will call you through shortly,' the receptionist said. James went to sit down on one of the seats. Padfoot jumped up to sit on the seat next to him.
'Sit on the floor like the rest of the dogs,' James murmured quietly so that he could only be heard by Padfoot. 'You need to fit in.'
Padfoot seemed as though he was still being stubborn, though. He sat on the human chair and whined annoyingly loud, and then proceeded to bark at a nearby cat.
'PADFOOT!'
James glanced up to see Regulus standing by the door, holding a clipboard in his hand and looking extremely doctorly and professional. He was glancing around the waiting room with a small well-mannered smile on his face. 'Padfoot?' he said again, looking down at his clipboard to make sure he'd got the name correct.
James jumped up and walked towards Regulus, pulling Padfoot along behind him. He was so excited that he nearly tripped over his own feet a couple of times, but he finally reached Regulus and beamed at him.
'Hey, Regulus! Wow, I didn't know you worked here! What are the chances?'
'James!' Regulus said, smiling at him. 'That's so weird – you randomly coming in to the vet's surgery that I work in. Huh, strange. Anyway, let's see your dog. Come with me.'
James followed him through the door and into a clinical-looking room, filled with all sorts of strange instruments and tools. Padfoot seemed to be eyeing these instruments warily. In the middle of the room was a metal table.
'Let's put him up on the table and see what's going on,' Regulus said, taking Padfoot off the leash and lifting him up. Padfoot growled at him.
'Sorry, he's a bit grumpy today,' James said.
'Most pets are when they come here,' Regulus replied, putting Padfoot down on the table. 'They don't really enjoy getting poked and prodded by stangers. But can you blame them?'
I'd love to get poked and prodded by you, James thought, staring dreamily at him. 'Hey, do you see all kinds of animals here?'
'Do you have a specific animal in mind?'
'Ah, I don't know. My uncle has deer and stags. They sometimes get ill. I was just wondering.'
Regulus laughed. 'No, we don't see deer. But you can probably get someone to go to your uncles' and see them privately. I'll find out for you if you want.'
James shook his head, smiling at how sweet it was that Regulus wanted to help him. 'No, that's fine. Don't worry about it.'
Regulus turned his attention to Padfoot, holding a stethoscope to his chest and listening carefully.
'Anything abnormal?' James asked.
Regulus took the stethoscope off and shook his head. 'No. His breathing sounds fine.'
'Oh, what a relief!'
'He does smell a bit, though,' Regulus said. 'Have you been giving him regular baths?'
Before James could reply, Padfoot barked loudly, turning around on the table and facing away from Regulus. He then began to whine.
'He refuses to let me bathe him,' James said.
Padfoot rolled over and continued whining, staring up at the ceiling. His eyes were watery and sad-looking, as though he was crying. James rolled his eyes.
'He's very… dramatic,' Regulus observed. Just then, a young man walked into the room – another member of staff. He smiled at Regulus and walked over to a drawer, opening it and looking around for something inside. Padfoot's eyes travelled with the man, paying particular attention to his arse. Regulus seemed to notice this, and James gritted his teeth. Couldn't Sirius act like a normal dog for ten minutes? Regulus's colleague left the room with Padfoot's eyes following him. Padfoot made a small sound as the door shut. 'Was your dog staring at Dr Clark's arse?' Regulus asked, with a hint of amusement in his voice.
'He's… er…spent a lot of time around Sirius,' James said, hoping Regulus would believe him.
'Ah,' Regulus said, nodding. 'That explains it. The overdramatic whining, the crying, the… staring…'
Padfoot stood up at this comment, walked to the edge of the table and snarled at Regulus. Regulus cocked his head to the side and pulled up the skin on Padfoot's mouth to examine his teeth. 'Hmm…' he said, letting go of the skin and grabbing a magnifying glass from the counter to his right. He leaned closer to Padfoot, peering through the magnifying glass at his fur. Padfoot kept fidgeting the entire time.
James couldn't stop himself from staring at Regulus. He couldn't understand how one person could look so damn adorable while doing things that were not-so-pleasant, like inspecting a flea-ridden dog's fur and having his face to close to him when he clearly smelled bad. James was so caught up in his staring that he forgot he was supposed to be chatting Regulus up. This was his chance. Sure, the situation wasn't perfect, but they were both there, a mere few inches apart, and James didn't want to waste his opportunity.
'So, uh… you like animals, huh?'
'Yes…' Regulus murmured, not taking his eyes off Padfoot, who was whining once more.
'Me too,' James said. 'So… what else do you like?'
Regulus glanced up at him. 'What else do I like?'
'Yeah. Do you like long walks on the beach? Picnics? Dancing naked in the moonlight-'
Padfoot barked aggressively, baring his teeth at James. Regulus cleared his throat and nodded towards Padfoot. 'James, I think your dog might have rabies. And fleas. He definitely has fleas.' At this comment, Padfoot turned back to Regulus and tried to bite him, making him jump back in shock.
James laughed.
'What's so funny?'
'He must have picked the fleas up from Sirius too,' James said, earning another growl from Padfoot.
Regulus just frowned. 'James, from what I've seen, he's very aggressive. I'll have to get one of my senior colleagues to take a look at him, but if we don't find any underlying illness which is causing his aggressive behaviour, then I'm really sorry but he may have to be put down.'
Padfoot's ears pricked up at this.
'Oh, no,' James said quickly. 'He's always been this way. He's not aggressive, just… rude.'
'Rude?'
'Dogs generally aren't rude, James,' Regulus said. 'I know this is really hard to hear, but sometimes when an animal is too aggressive, it's dangerous to keep them-'
Regulus was cut off by Padfoot jumping off the table, running straight into James and knocking him over, and bolting out of the room. Regulus hurried over to James and held his hand out. James took his hand, trying desperately not to smile, and let Regulus help him up.
'Are you alright?' Regulus asked, and the concerned tone in his voice made James go weak in the knees. He's worried about me, James thought to himself happily.
'Yeah, I'm good. He does that a lot too,' James said, letting go of Regulus's hand regrettably.
'He seems like a handful,' Regulus said. 'It's so sweet of you to take care of him, even though he's like this. A lot of people wouldn't bother because it's too much work, and they'd give him back. You're a compassionate person, and I think that's really nice… it's good for him.'
James couldn't believe what he was hearing. Regulus Black was calling him sweet and compassionate. He couldn't stop himself grinning from ear to ear. All he had to do now was just close the gap between them with a kiss… it would be so easy…they were already standing so close to each other…
'So, I have another appointment in a minute,' Regulus said, breaking James out of his thoughts.
'Right. Yes. Of course,' James said. Damn it, he thought. Missed my chance.
'Bring Padfoot back if you still want to get him checked and I can get my colleague to have a proper look at him, alright?'
'Yeah, I will do," James said. He started walking towards the door, trying to think about what he could say to get Regulus to go out with him, but the door was getting closer and closer and he had absolutely zero ideas on what to say. When he reached the door, he turned to face Regulus again.
Regulus smiled kindly at him. 'It was nice seeing y-'
'-Wanna go out with me tonight for a drink?' James blurted out, unable to stop himself. He was shocked by his own words, and his shock seemed to be echoed in Regulus's face.
Regulus stared at him for a minute, looking completely bewildered, but then his expression softened and he raised his eyebrows at James. 'Don't you have a dog to chase?'
'I mean after I chase my dog,' James replied, looking at Regulus with a desperate sort of anticipation. He felt as though his heart could leap out of his chest at any moment. He had asked Regulus out. If the answer was no, he wanted the floor to open up right there and swallow him whole, but if the answer was yes, then…
James swallowed, and continued staring at Regulus.
'I'd love to go out with you tonight,' Regulus said quietly, sounding shy for the first time since they'd started talking. His usually pale face was now pink, and James had never seen anything so adorable in his life. He wanted to grab Regulus, to pull him close, to kiss him like there was no tomorrow…
He found himself gazing at Regulus's lips. No, he wouldn't kiss him now. He'd wait for later. He'd be a gentleman about it. Regulus deserved a gentleman, after all.
'I finish at six. We could meet at seven?' Regulus continued, when it became clear that James was too lost in his thoughts to talk.
'Yes. Seven. That sounds great! I'll pick you up, if you want?'
Regulus smiled a small smile. 'That would be really nice. Do you know where I live?'
'Sirius can tell me,' James replied. 'So, seven o'clock, your place. It's a date.'
Regulus's face turned pinker at James's words, and James suddenly wondered if he should have said the word "date". Maybe Regulus hadn't wanted a date. Maybe Regulus thought that James was just asking him out as friends. Shit, he thought.
'Not a date date… I just mean… unless you want it to be a date date, then…' James trailed off, scratching his head and feeling a little embarrassed.
Regulus took a step closer to him. 'I want it to be a date date,' he whispered.
James swallowed hard and nodded, trying not to smile like a maniac. 'Good. Me too. So it's a date." He held out his hand to shake Regulus's.
Regulus glanced down at James's hand. Instead of shaking it, he pulled it up to his face and planted a soft kiss on the back of his hand, and now James couldn't possibly keep the goofy grin off his face.
'I'll see you tonight,' Regulus said with a smile. 'But you better go and find your dog before he kills someone.'
James blinked. 'Right. My dog. Yes, I'd better go. Well, I'll see you later.' He walked out the door, straight through the waiting room and out of the building in a sort of trance. He still couldn't believe how well that had gone. He could still feel where Regulus had kissed his hand and he suddenly never wanted to wash that hand again.
'I hope it was worth it,' Sirius snapped, appearing in front of James and looking quite irritated.
James smirked. 'Oh, it was very worth it.'
'Ugh, I don't need to hear,' Sirius said quickly, covering his ears childishly. 'And you owe me a cooked breakfast for the next month for that.'
'Sure,' James said, lost in his thoughts again. He was going on a real proper date with Regulus Black tonight, and nothing could wipe the smile off his face because he knew that he was the luckiest guy in the world.
~The End~
