Author's note: Told you I would write more, didn't I? What can I say: Swanqueen is amazing. And totally endgame. (in my mind).Hope you enjoy this short, silly one-shot.

Disclaimer: I do not own OUaT, or Swanqueen sexiness. Because, my dear readers, if I did, this would be in an episode.

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Moonlight filtered in through the open window in the upstairs bedroom, lighting up the couple wrapped up together underneath the silk sheets. Regina Mills, resident badass mayor and supposedly a evil witch, was cuddling quite happily against Storybrooke's blonde savior. Their bare and cooling bodies fit comfortably together, like two puzzle pieces matched together. The brunette's head was nestled against her sheriff's chest, listening to the steady heartbeat beneath her ear.

"So, how was my performance this time, Mayor Mills? Did I get five stars?" The mayor rolled her eyes. "Do not get too full of yourself now, Miss Swan. I wouldn't want your tiny brain to explode." Emma just chuckled; she was used to their banter, and loved it immensely. It did not diminish their feelings in the slightest. "Well, I can always tell when I did good. You always fall into an exhausted sleep and start snoring on me." Regina's head popped up, eyes narrowing at her lover. "I do not snore! Everyone knows queens do not snore." Her indignant squawk and haughty tone just amused Emma that much more. "Oh yes you do, Madame Mayor. After we finish you'll lay down, fall asleep, and the next thing I know I have a snoring queen on me. Hey, can I record it? It could be added as a piece in an orchestra; a symphony of Regina Mill's nighttime noises!"

Oh, if looks could kill, the Saviour would need to use her powers to save her own hide. You see, the thing about Regina is that she does not take well to people outlining her "defects." Even though she was not the same person she had been, she could not take critiscms well still. Even joking ones spoken by her true love.

"I will not tell you again, Emma! .Not.Snore!" Emma thoughtfully tapped the side of her face, giving her annoyed lover a mock contemplative look. "Hmm, so that loud noise that keeps me awake at night, coming from the direction of your mouth, is not you snoring? So the air I feel against my neck at the same time as the noise is only a coincidence? Maybe there is a special fairy that makes the sound? You ever hear of them when you lived in the Enchanted Forest?"

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"Your jokes are not very amusing, Miss Swan. I can see why you chose to become a sheriff rather than a comedian. Your meager paycheck is a good deal bigger than it would have been otherwise. Ten people a night does not really rake in the money." A snort came out of said woman's mouth. "Oh really? I seem to remember you laughing at those unamusing jokes earlier today." "Unamusing? Are you aware that is not even a real word? You know what, probably not. I don't believe you have ever even seen a dictionary." Emma adopted a confused expression. "Dictionary? What is that, another one of those toys you love so mu-"Regina clapped her hand over the blonde's mouth, a blush forming on her cheeks. She could feel the blonde's smirk against her palm. She scowled.

"A huh, your crass vocabulary leaves a lot to be desired. Remind me again of why I put up with you." "Because of the awesome se-…nighttime fun." Emma quickly backtracked her words at the intense stare she received from her bedmate. "Mmm, not really. I have had better." A perfectly poised eyebrow rose up; a fair imitation of her girlfriend. "Better, huh? So a hairy furball is better than..all of this?" She gestured provocatively to her body, wiggling her eyebrows for good measure. Needless to say, Regina was unimpressed. "Yes, dear; you caught me. You are just so irresistible. I just cannot contain myself at the sight of you." "I know, I know; no need to beg so shamelessly. "I do not beg, Emma."

"Like you don't snore? I know you are technically like a fictional character in a children's book, but the noises that come out of you sure are real." Regina facepalmed. "Dear, if you keep it up, you won't be hearing any noises coming out of me for a long, long time." Eyes got wide; if she was in an anime, she would have sweatdropped. "Okay, okay! No need to be evil." What could only be described as a wicked grin popped onto the queen's face. "But, my dear; I AM the evil queen." "But…evil queens don't cuddle. Or snore."

Normally at this point, the sheriff would be alone on the couch, clutching a pillow and a blanket loosely wrapped around her as she pouted. However, the queen found a better use for Sheriff Swan's mouth.

Hours later, a satisfied blonde collapsed beside her panting brunette lover. "Wow…I should piss you off more often. I like those kind of punishments." Regina just looked at her. "Do not push your luck, dear." Emma laughed, pulling her love against her chest. "Never, my queen. Not when my luck brought me you." The two women snuggled together the rest of the night, dreaming of each other and the good fortune they had of finally finding their soulmate.

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