Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ…or the word 'poop'.
Title: Bubbles
Summary: A bizarre moment in the Briefs household. Poor Vegeta just can't catch a break. References to V/B.
A/N: This just popped into my head literally two seconds ago. DON'T ASK.
"Daddy?"
"What?"
"You smell like poop."
For a moment, Vegeta seriously considered strangling his only son.
"I smell like WHAT?"
Trunks wrinkled his nose in disgust, "Poop, Daddy. It's gross. You should take a bath."
"I do NOT smell like poop!"
The six year old shook his head, his purple mop flapping, "No, Daddy, I know what poop smells like. This one time, me and Goten were playing and we saw this really big pile of brown stuff and we thought it was mud…but it wasn't…but we didn't know…so we threw it at each other…mom was REALLY mad. She made me take a really long bath. It was TERRIBLE!"
Vegeta shook his head, "I do not smell like poop," he repeated, glaring down at the boy.
Trunks frowned and put his hands on his hips. Vegeta flinched. Bulma's mannerisms were starting to rub off on their son. He really needed to train the kid more…beat his mother's annoying little habits out of him.
"Daddy, it's really gross. REALLY gross. Mommy is gonna be really mad when she smells you."
"Maybe your mother won't WANT to smell me? Ever think about that?"
"But Dad…I could smell it when you were outside and I was in the kitchen…"
Vegeta pinched the top of his nose, "Trunks, how many times do I have to tell you, I DO NOT SMELL LIKE POOP!"
"Who smells like poop?"
Bulma entered the living room with a bag of groceries under one arm and something that resembled a dissected computer under the other.
"Daddy," Trunks replied. Vegeta scowled.
"I do not."
Bulma inhaled deeply and turned a nasty glare on her husband.
"Ew, Vegeta, you do smell like poop! When was the last time you showered?!"
A faint pink tinge appeared on Vegeta's cheeks.
"WHAT?!" Bulma dropped the groceries and hefted the computer thing over her head with both arms. Both Vegeta and Trunks took an unconscious step back. Bulma had been known to throw remarkably large objects in fits of rage. "Is that a joke, Vegeta?! THAT was the last time you showered?!"
Vegeta glanced at Trunks awkwardly for a moment before turning his eyes to the ground.
"It's none of your business when I shower, woman."
Somehow, it didn't sound as masculine as it had in his head. Maybe it was the embarrassment in his voice.
"You will take a bath right now! That's right, a bath," Bulma shrieked, ignoring Vegeta's slight groan of annoyance, "Trunks, you go with him! You need a bath too! We wouldn't want you to end up smelling like your gross father, would we?"
Trunks grinned and rocked back on his heels.
"Awesome! I'll get the bubbles!"
Vegeta stared after his wife and son as they left the room, Bulma to go work on some obscure invention, Trunks to fetch the 'bubbles'. Then, when he was sure they were gone, he lifted his arm to his nose and sniffed.
"I do not smell like poop," he grumbled, before stalking out the door to join his son.
A/N: Wow…that was so random. It probably came from all those Starbursts I just ate (I don't own Starburst…yeah, paranoid disclaimers). Heheh…read and review?
