Time and Space
Thank you for seeing me Dr. Gyson
I have to admit Detective….. I wasn't that surprised to hear from you states Paula Gyson as she motions for Alex Eames to have a seat. You realize I only agreed to speak to you about Robert because you've been a part of his counseling sessions in the past but I warn you…I'll only go so far.
Fair enough acknowledges Alex Eames. So Dr. Gyson, can you shed any light as to why my partner decided to retire?
I'm not sure Detective replies Gyson, Robert did come to see me after he made the decision to retire and then a second time a week prior to his actually retiring. We did discuss his rationale for retiring but he never indicated that there was any particular reason for his decision. Gyson continued he simply felt it was time.
I take it Detective…you don't agree?
Alex replies "Bobby never asked me what I thought…he just announced it in the car one day as we were driving to lunch".
So Gyson asks "you had no idea that he was thinking of retiring".
As she waits for a reply Gyson thinks about her two previous meeting with Alex Eames. They occurred early on after Robert Goren decided to continue his therapy sessions past those mandated by the NYPD.
Gyson was actually surprised that her patient agreed to invite his longtime partner to his therapy sessions. Eames didn't so much take an active part in the sessions but more she served as an anchor to her partner. While Gyson felt she had been making progress in their therapy Goren seemed far more comfortable and was a lot more open with her after the two sessions his partner attended.
It was almost as if she had to approve of Gyson before he could go any further. Her recollections of the past are interrupted by her guest's reply.
"I knew he was thinking about retiring" replies Alex Eames. "I just hoped that he would realize that there was no reason for him to retire".
So Gyson asks "he is 52 years old, you don't think he had lost a step or slowed down"? "Maybe he didn't feel physically up to the job anymore"
Alex Eames looks Paula Gyson right in the eye "No Dr. Gyson, Bobby was a good as he ever was". Eames continues "in fact, he was better than he had been in years". She continues "he was at peace for the first time in years and it showed in his work". Like I said…..Bobby was as good as he ever was, he was working out, he had lost weight and for the first time in years, nobody in command was actively looking for his head on a platter.
Let me ask you Detective…when Robert actually told you he was retiring what was your reaction?
Alex Eames takes a moment before she replies "I knew he had been considering and I didn't want him to stay if the only reason he was staying was for me." She continues " I wasn't going to make his decision harder than it was so when he told me, I asked him was he sure, he said he was so I said he was the best cop I ever knew and that drinks were on me his last day".
Dr. Gyson I wasn't going to talk him out of it if that's what he wanted. I just want to make sure that is what he wanted.
Well Detective as the risk of stating the obvious…why don't you just ask him why he retired. My experience with Robert tells me that if anyone will get a straight answer from him…..it's you.
With that Alex Eames faces grows reflective "Bobby and I kind of dance around the personal stuff I'm afraid". She sighs "I'm probably the last person he would actually talk to about his reasons for retiring".
Detective Eames some things you just have to take on faith say Paula Gyson. I don't believe there's anything more to Robert Goren's decision to retire other than he felt it was time for him to go. Why he felt that way I can't get into but if it gives you any peace of mind, it was an honest decision, one he had thought about for some time.
Once again, I suggest you just ask him why he retired. I think your wrong Detective Eames, Robert's more likely to tell you than you might think.
As Alex Eames stands to leave she replies "I'm afraid that's neither here nor there anyway. Bobby took a job that's taken him out of town for a while. Other than a few text messages I haven't spoken to him since the week he retired.
Why is that Detective? I thought the two of you were going to have drinks on his last day?
A look of pain and regret flash across Alex Eames face before she can put her mask back on. She's not sure she should reveal to Paula Gyson that she intended to have more than a last drink between partners with Robert Goren.
She intended to throw caution to the wind and find out how Robert Goren really felt about her and if he wanted a relationship away from the job or not.
If there was a chance for something between them beyond the job she was willing to try if he was….but she had to know, she had to hear it from his month that's what he wanted. She had to hear him say he wanted to take a chance and try to build a relationship with her
What she got was someone who didn't come to work on his last day of retirement.
What she got was someone who couldn't even bring himself to call her so he sent a text message that he had a new job and was out of town.
What she got was someone who wouldn't even give her a chance to open the door a crack.
She knew he was tired and scared and trying to find his way in life without the job he cherished so she was willing to give him time and space to do that but she needed something, some sign from him that she wasn't just imaging that his attention to her all these years, his consideration of her was more than just what the job required…that he actual wanted and needed her.
But Alex Eames didn't reveal any of that to Dr. Paula Gyson.
As she turned to leave Alex Eames simply said "Bobby took the last couple of days off before he retired. I was swamped with work and had a new partner to boot….we just didn't have time to get together before he left".
"We missed each other" was the last thing Alex Eames said as she walked out the door of Paula Gyson office.
As Gyson watched Alex Eames drive away she thought "you two do that a lot" as she closed her office door.
