Castiel stood close to the cave's entrance. Usually they wouldn't have picked somewhere they could easily get trapped if the monsters found them, but Dean needed to rest and sitting against a tree for ten minutes in a light slumber wasn't going to cut it this time. He had made his friend stop while they were trekking through the miles and miles of trees and dirt to rest. Of course with Dean been Dean, he had argued at first saying they didn't have time to stop, that they had to keep going. . .but a look from Castiel and the hunter's resolve had broken quicker and easier than it ever had before, which showed the Angel and the Vampire just how tired the Human was.
Rather than keeping a look out, he was watching the sleeping man. Even now, here in Purgatory, Dean looked so peaceful while he slept. Castiel had a feeling why, he was sure the Hunter was dreaming of home –of a happy Sammy, a living Bobby, and of them both how they were before the Leviathans.
He shook his head, trying to rid himself of his memories. . .or rather, his mistakes. Dean had forgiven him. They were okay. They were back to normal.
He could see Dean shivering. Without thinking he took off his dirty and bloodied trench coat before walking into the cave and gently draping it over the Hunter. He didn't think Dean would mind it been dirty –dirt and mess were trivial things in Purgatory, even to him.
He watched Dean grab at the coat and pull it closer to him, gripping at it tightly; the collar was pulled right up to his face, almost as if the Hunter was smelling it –Castiel realised it probably did smell bad but when he saw the smile that took over Dean's sleeping face, he thought maybe it was his scent that he was sniffing at. He remembered when Dean gave him the trench coat back, when he didn't have all his marbles, he had been so happy. . .happier than he had been for a long while. The fact that Dean had kept his coat all that time, even after everything that had happened, well, it meant more than he could express –in a way, it had meant more than Dean's forgiveness.
As he stood watching his Hunter sleep, it was easy to forget where they were. Almost.
"Hey, Angel boy, we're supposed to be keeping an eye out –y'know seen as everything is drawn to you,"
Benny's voice snapped Castiel out of his thoughts and he looked away from Dean quickly. He moved back out to the entrance of the little cave. He didn't bother giving a retort to the Vampire. He would rather ignore him, and keep an eye out for any Monsters on his own but Dean wanted to keep the watches in twos for safety. He would rather it be just him and Dean, but he knew that wasn't going to happen. . .Benny had a way out of this horrid place. And he would make sure Dean got to that portal if it was the last thing he ever did. So, if he had to play nice with a Vampire, then that was what he would do.
"Hey, can I ask y' something?" Benny asked, looking out for signs of trouble.
Castiel didn't answer Benny, he just kept looking around.
"Hey, I'm talking to you,"
Castiel sighed. He was so tired he couldn't even be bothered to ignore the Vampire. "You can ask, but that does not mean I will answer."
Benny chuckled. "How well did you know him before all this? 'M assuming you were close, no matter how many times I tried t' convince him. . .he wouldn't go t' the portal without you."
Castiel couldn't help the sad smile that took over his mouth; that was, well, so Dean. . .but he should have gone without him, the idiot. "I knew-. . .he was-. . .we were close. Very close."
"Yeah?"
"Yes. We share a profound bond - I raised him from Hell. I fell for him-,"
"You don't got t' tell me that. It's obvious." Benny told the Angel, smirking. He glanced at Castiel and his smirk widened at the Angel's icy –albeit slightly confused- stare.
"I fell from Heaven for him." Castiel clarified.
"But that's not the only way y' fell for him, is it?"
"I do not see how that is any of your business." Castiel told him, looking back out towards the endless darkness.
"It ain't, I just want t' know."
Castiel frowned at the darkness; why couldn't Benny just be quiet like he usually was during their watches? "I rebelled against Heaven. I died for him, more than once. I became a God for him, but now I see what I became was a Monster. . ." He cut off. He was remembering again. He didn't want to remember. He covered his eyes with his right hand, almost hoping that would erase the memories. He kept his hand there as he spoke, "He has done much for me too –he gave me something to believe in, became my first and most important friend, showed me how to have freedom and make my own choices. . .and much more."
"How can you say that, and then go through with what you have planned?"
Castiel lifted his face out of his hand at that. He looked over to Benny, who was looking at him –his expression wasn't judging, it was one of wanting to understand. "I. . .how do you-," He didn't understand. How could Benny know what he was planning to do? Not even Dean knew –of course, if the Hunter knew, his plan wouldn't succeed- and if the person he cared for most didn't know. . .how could something he didn't even like know?
"I can see it in your face, Angel boy," Benny told him. He glanced into the cave at Dean before looking back at Castiel. "I think he ignores it, what he sees in your eyes –the something he doesn't understand- he knows it's there but he'd rather not know what it is you're not telling him. He loves you too much to lose you again."
Castiel's eyes widened. Maybe the Vampire wasn't as bad as he thought he was –if he could see love, was he really that much of a Monster? He swallowed thickly before looking back at the darkness. "He does not see anything in my eyes he does not know –he doesn't see my plan because he is blinded."
"By love." Benny assumed.
"Yes, I believe so."
Benny smiled, looking back into the darkness. "I want you to know, if you succeed in your plan of staying behind. . .I will do all it takes to get him through the portal. He has my back, I have his."
Castiel knew what the Vampire was saying –if Dean tried to argue or make him go back home or even if he tried to stay in Purgatory. . .Benny would somehow force him through the portal. He nodded at the Vampire, a slight smile on his face. "Thank-you, please make sure you do. He cannot stay here."
Benny nodded, a notion that showed he would keep his word.
There was a rustling not far from them. "Damn it," Benny snapped. "We should probably get going, Angel boy, wake your boyfriend." He smirked at the Angel.
Castiel cast the Vampire an icy look before he hurried into the cave. He knelt down in front of the Hunter. He didn't want to wake him, he needed his rest. No, he needed to get out of this place. He touched Dean's shoulder –where the scar of his handprint was- gently shaking him. "Dean, we must go. Something has found us."
Dean opened his eyes slowly, sleepily. "Cas?"
"Yes, it is me."
Dean smiled softly, still half asleep. He reached his hand up and ran his knuckles across the hair covering his Angel's chin before cupping his cheek –and for a moment, Castiel wanted to believe they were back at home sharing a moment in the Impala or Bobby's house. . .just as Dean was doing now; he had been dreaming, been woken up, and not realised they were truly in Purgatory. He pulled Cas down to him, and gently pressed their lips together. He waited for Cas to close his eyes moaning into the kiss before he followed and did the same, deepening the kiss. He could kiss Cas forever, forget everything that had happened and just be the two of them again.
"Hate t' ruin the moment but we got t' go!" Benny yelled –he had been glancing back and forth between them and whatever was coming, he hadn't wanted to call them. . .but what choice did he have?
Dean pulled away from Castiel, slowly, and the Angel could see it in his Hunter's eyes. . .the recognition, the realisation. . .he knew where they were was real and not the dream. He could see it in his eyes. . .the disappointment and the little bit of hope that was lost.
"We should go," Dean sighed.
"Yes," Cas nodded. He had to get Dean out of Purgatory, and he had to do it quickly. Dean had changed already, he couldn't let the Hunter change completely. He loved him too much for that. He took hold of Dean's face with both hands, smiling. "Let's get to that portal."
Dean hadn't seen Cas speak so frigging determinedly about the portal before. He couldn't help but smile at his Angel, hopeful. "Yeah, let's get home Cas."
Castiel stared at Dean, watching him stand and smile down at him. He stood up too. He couldn't tell Dean he wasn't going with him. He just couldn't. He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Dean's chastely. "Yes." He agreed with Dean, lying. He felt worse lying to Dean now more than he had when he realised what he had done with the Leviathans and breaking Sam's wall –Dean was so hopeful right now, more than he had been when he went to sleep, and he was lying to him.
"C'mon, we got trouble!" Benny yelled.
Castiel only watched Dean. He had to lie to him, for now at least. He had to get him home no matter what.
Dean sighed and grabbed his Purgatory blade from the ground, touched Cas' face somewhat lovingly before he started towards the cave's entrance and Benny. "Let's get this over with. We're going home!" He yelled and ran out of the Cave, Castiel close by and Benny quick on their heels.
End!
Thanks for reading and hope to hear what you thought. thanks.
I've been trying to write a Destiel fic for, well, since about season 4! And haven't really accomplished been able to apart from my 'watching over you' fic. I have an idea for another so hopefully I can get that done too. :)
