Let's Have A Barbeque Today!

Percy stared in . . . not quite horror at the place where Nico had taken him. At first he'd thought Nico had accidentally brought him and Annabeth to the wrong place. Then he saw the sign in the window and groaned.

"Nico," he said, "This . . . it's not . . ."

"Fast food chains trying to do barbeque is not real barbeque!" declared Annabeth, moving to stand in front of Nico and glare at him. "Believe me, I know. I'm from the South. And if there's one thing we know there, it's barbeque."

"Have you ever had this place's barbeque before?" asked Nico, giving Annabeth a defiant look.

"I don't need to, Nico. You know why? Because this is Burger King. Burger King is not a barbeque restaurant!"

"Oh yeah?" demanded Nico. "Well that sign right there begs to differ!"

Percy glanced again at the sign that hung in the Burger King's window, proudly displaying the message, "Let's Have A Barbeque Today!"

Annabeth gave an exasperated sigh that did nothing to dampen Nico's enthusiasm. He dashed toward the restaurant, not bothering to hide his eagerness. Annabeth glanced toward Percy, who shrugged.

"Whatever makes him happy," said Percy, moving to hold the door open for his girlfriend.

By the time they'd caught up to Nico, he'd already ordered for all three of them and was in the process of paying. Percy had no idea where Nico got his money but he always seemed to be loaded. He half suspected that Nico got his cash from looting corpses . . . but Hades was known to be a wealthy god, so it was just as likely that it was his allowance.

"I got us all Memphis pork barbeque sandwiches," Nico told them when they reached him. "And sweet potato fries. Have you ever had those before? They're wonderful! They're like French fries, except they're sweet and salty."

"They sound disgusting, Nico," said Annabeth. "And who told you to order for me?"

"Well I wasn't going to let you order for yourself," said Nico. "You wouldn't have ordered the barbeque, since you're so biased against it. You would have ordered something else. And that would have completely defeated the purpose of this trip!"

"Did you get us drinks?" asked Percy, noticing that the cashier hadn't given them cups for the soda machine. Perhaps Nico had forgotten those in his haste? Percy started to get out his wallet, planning to buy their drinks since Nico had taken care of everything else, but then Nico was bobbing his head up and down.

"I got us all frozen strawberry lemonade!" he said proudly. "That's part of their Summer Barbeque menu too!"

Percy shook his head, but couldn't help smiling. Beside him he noticed Annabeth caught somewhere between being amused and annoyed.

"Nico," she said, "you are way too susceptible to marketing ploys."

"Am not," Nico defended himself.

"You ordered everything on their promo menu thing."

"Did not. I didn't get the Carolina Barbeque Whoppers. Or the Texas Barbeque Whoppers. Not this time, at least."

Percy started laughing. He couldn't help it. Beside him he saw Annabeth struggling not to join in.

Then Nico sauntered over to where a number of the cardboard crowns that Burger King kept on-hand for kids were sitting on the counter and snatched one up. He put it on his head and carefully adjusted it, then bounded over to get their drinks which had just been made. The next thing Percy knew, he was holding a large clear cup full of the dark pink concoction known as frozen strawberry lemonade.

"Try it," ordered Nico. "It's good."

"It's pink," said Percy, looking at it with mixed embarrassment and annoyance.

"Because of the strawberries," explained Nico.

"Nico," said Percy, "never buy me a pink drink again."

Beside him Annabeth laughed and reluctantly took a sip of her own strawberry lemonade. "It's not bad," she decided.

Percy tried his and considered. "It tastes OK . . . but it's still pink."

Moments later, three heaping cartons of orange sweet potato fries were put down on a tray on the counter. "Your sandwiches will be ready in a moment," the boy behind the counter told them.

"Good, good," said Nico, already pulling a handful of fries off the tray.

"Nico, I think we're supposed to wait until we sit down to eat those," said Annabeth.

"Why?"

"Because they don't want you dropping them all over the floor."

Nico looked indignant. "I'm not dropping them on the floor. That would be a waste."

"Just let him," said Percy, who by now had learned the futility of arguing with Nico, or trying to get him to do things another way once he'd decided on something. His trip to the Styx was testament to the fact that you couldn't talk Nico out of a plan. You could only delay him from putting it into motion. And since his plan today was to gobble down French fries, the only thing that delaying that plan would accomplish would be making the fries grow cold. Somehow Percy was sure that would result in a very annoyed Nico.

Only minutes later, their sandwiches were set down on the tray. Nico picked it up and quickly made his way to a table near the windows. Percy and Annabeth followed at a slower pace since the idea of fast food barbeque didn't excite them as much as it apparently excited Nico.

"This stuff is really good," said Nico, distributing the food as his friends sat down. "It's on par with McDonald's good. And it's only here for a limited time."

"See?" said Annabeth to Percy. "Susceptible to marketing ploys."

Percy had to agree. But nonetheless, he opened up his sandwich box and unwrapped the barbeque sandwich. And he had to admit, it didn't look like there was anything wrong with it. It actually looked and smelled really good. And he loved barbeque. He raised it to his mouth and took a careful bite, then nodded. "It's actually pretty good."

Annabeth still looked skeptical. "I don't know about this. Fast food barbeque . . . Orange French fries . . ."

"They're orange because they're made of sweet potatoes. Not because they've got food coloring in or something."

"It still seems weird," said Annabeth.

"Not as weird as Percy's blue Coke, but you don't bug him about it."

Annabeth sighed and picked up her own sandwich. She took a tentative bite then froze.

"Well?" asked Nico.

Annabeth's expression was hard to read. As was her voice when she spoke. "Well . . . it's not the worst thing I've ever tasted."

"You like it," translated Percy.

"I never said that!"

"You didn't have to."

"I only said it's not the worst thing I've tasted."

"Which is probably the nicest thing you're going to say about it, given that you were so set against it to begin with," said Percy.

"I – that's not . . . okay, it's alright. I'll give you that," snapped Annabeth. "Happy?"

"Very," said Nico. "But . . . uh, well, you've got some sauce dripping down your face."

Annabeth quickly picked up a napkin and dabbed around her mouth. "Did I get it?"

Percy shook his head. "It's more off to the side."

"Just have Percy lick it off for you," advised Nico.

"Nico!" Percy and Annabeth both exclaimed at the same time.

"I'm just saying what you're both thinking," said Nico, a wicked gleam in his dark eyes.

"Neither one of us was thinking that," growled Annabeth, managing to wipe away the sauce on her own.

"Mmm hmmm." Nico did not look convinced.

"Just eat your own sandwich," ordered Percy. "And stop talking."

"I was going to do that anyway."

Annabeth muttered something unintelligible under her breath and picked her sandwich back up. And Percy noticed that she dug into it the way she did when she thoroughly enjoyed something, but decided not to comment on that. He figured that the time for teasing was over, and that Nico had been right. Right about the Burger King barbeque being good. Not about the sauce thing. Not that he wasn't right about that too, but some things were better left unmentioned.


Two weeks later

Summer was winding to a close. School would be starting soon, and camp had just ended. And like always, Percy was sad to see it end. He much preferred the relaxed, family-like feel of camp to the rigid rules of school, even if his current high school wasn't so bad. It was just a whole lot nicer to be around people who were like him, who wouldn't judge him for his dyslexia or ADHD. He liked being able to see his friends, and especially his girlfriend, everyday. And yeah, he'd be able to go back to camp on the weekends, and over holidays, but it wasn't the same.

"Cheer up, Percy."

Percy jumped, because a second ago, he'd been alone on his balcony, but suddenly he had company. Annabeth and Nico had both appeared beside him, out of the shadows.

"What are you guys doing here?" he asked, a smile spreading across his face at the sight of his girlfriend and one of his best friends.

"Annabeth called me and said you were moping and we needed to come get you," answered Nico, holding up a sleek black cell phone.

"You have a cell phone now?" asked Percy, a little alarmed.

"Don't worry. I only keep it on at night, except when I'm playing Angry Birds."

Percy gave him a sideways look.

"I can shadow travel away from any monster that picks up the signal at night," explained Nico.

"Oh. Well, I guess that makes it relatively safer. Unless someone calls you while you're playing Angry Birds . . ."

"Don't be a killjoy," said Nico, holding out a hand to him.

"Yeah, Seaweed Brain," agreed Annabeth, holding her hand out to him as well. "Come on already."

Percy glanced back into his window. It was unlikely that his mom would come check on him or anything . . . and she was pretty used to demigod stuff cropping up and him having to leave suddenly by now, but . . . "Where are we going?" he asked.

"Back to Burger King," said Nico, smirking.

Percy looked at Annabeth who flushed slightly.

"Alright, I'll admit it! I've been craving another one of those sandwiches since the last time we were there. And I was the one who suggested we take you back there to cheer you up, since I know how you get whenever camp ends for the summer," said Annabeth. "And you liked that food too, so it's a win all around situation."

"So how about it?" asked Nico. "You coming?"

"Sure." Percy smiled as he reached out to take Annabeth's hand with one of his own, and Nico's hand in his other. "Let's have a barbeque today."


The above fic is not endorsed by either Rick Riordan or Burger King . . . but definitely should be endorsed by Burger King, because really, who could they possibly get to advertize their food better than Percy, Annabeth, and Nico? So McDonald's monopolized all the Olympic Olympians? Pah! We've got Percy Jackson and the Olympians!