Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer – culpable negligence?

Each Christmas season, this song comes around, and there is much impugning of Santa Claus' honor, but can he be considered solely to blame for this tragedy?

culpable negligence - (law) recklessly acting without reasonable caution and putting another person at risk of injury or death (or failing to do something with the same consequences)

Let's look at the facts:

1. Grandma had been drinking and the family knew this

2. She was on medication that she forgot to bring – the family knew this also

3. Their sole effort at keeping her safe and healthy consisted of "begging her not to go", but allowing it when she insisted.

Not unlike knowingly letting a person drive drunk.

4. She was not found until Christmas morning although there is nothing to suggest she wasn't somewhere directly between their house and her own. There is no evidence that a search was made until the following morning – they seem to have just assumed that all was well.

5. They're proud of Grandpa and how well he is taking it – watching football on tv, drinking beer and playing cards; this also seems to reflect how well they are taking it that Grandpa's actions do not disturb them in the slightest.

6. They wonder whether to open her gifts or send them back – could this be due to their wanting the gifts themselves, or the refund for any purchase they made for Grandma?

When considering all of this, we have to wonder whether the entire family did not in fact plot Grandma's demise and concoct this cock-and-bull story to cover it up. Did anyone see this accident occur? Just because there are hoof-prints doesn't mean it was Santa's reindeer. Did they live near a wooded area where wild deer might be to blame? Or could the hoof-prints have been 'planted'? What exactly are these 'incriminating Claus marks'? Do we have DNA proof indicating the source, or could they also have been staged?

For that matter, if they were so concerned about Grandma's health and welfare, why did no one offer to go get the medication for her, or at least to go with her? Did none of them have a car in which to drive her so she wasn't stumbling around in the cold and snow?

I have to wonder if Santa Claus is unjustly being made the fall guy here. The family perhaps thinks this is the perfect crime since how likely is it that Santa Claus could ever be apprehended? The very nature of his work requires him to work in secrecy, so they know it would be difficult for him to provide witness testimony in his defense.

No, personally, I wonder if we bring in a bona fide criminal forensic investigator, might we discover that the facts tell a much different story?

[Written by Randy Brooks • Copyright © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner/Chappell Music, Inc, BMG Rights Management US, LLC; recorded by Elmo & Patsy]

Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for me and grandpa we believe

She'd been drinking too much eggnog
And we begged her not to go
But she forgot her medication
And she staggered out the door into the snow

When we found her Christmas morning
At the scene of the attack
She had hoof-prints on her forehead
And incriminating Claus marks on her back

Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for me and grandpa we believe

Now we're all so proud of grandpa
He's been taking this so well
See him in there watching football
Drinking beer and playing cards with cousin Mel

It's not Christmas without Grandma
All the family's dressed in black
And we just can't help but wonder
Should we open up her gifts or send them back (send them back)

Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for me and grandpa we believe

Now the goose is on the table
And the pudding made of fig
And the blue and silver candles
That would just have matched the hair on grandma's wig

I've warned all my friends and neighbors
Better watch out for yourselves
They should never give a license
To a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves

Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for me and grandpa we believe

Sing it grandpa
Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve
You can say there's no such thing as Santa
But as for me and grandpa we believe
Merry Christmas