Illusion

~

The sun rises to another day

My constitution keeps changing

'Til it slips away

~

A small girl huddled in a corner, dried tears upon her cheeks. The horrors of battle still imprinted on her mind. Dark bangs fell in her eyes and fresh tears ran down her face, she did not stop them. Days had passed and she had not moved. Her fragile body shook with cold. She did not see life anymore, though there wasn't much life left. Only two cold, wet, bodies covered in their own blood.

~

So I lie awake and stare

My mind thinking, just wandering

Is anybody there?

~

Noin reached out and grabbed her father's hand; it was warm and comforting.

"Papa, will you tell me another story about outer space?" She asked tugging on his fingers.

"Not today Lucrezia, we have to go some where right now," he replied. Then he looked over at her mother who nodded in reply. They all silently crept out the back door and followed her Papa down some narrow streets.

"I'm tired, Papa," she complained slowing her pace. "I know hun, but we can't stop quite yet," he said, but then he looked towards some crafts flying low overhead. "I think its too late, Lorita," he admitted to her mother. Then he led them into a nearby building. He opened a hatch on the floor, which led to a tiny box of a room. Her mother began weeping and her father looked to Lucrezia.

"Lucrezia, you have to be strong for me, don't be scared," a tear ran down his cheek, "I love you very much and I believe that you will help to bring an end to all this madness and chaos." Then he lifted her up and set her down into the hole in the floor.

"No Papa, please don't leave me down here, I'm scared of the dark!" Lucrezia cried out.

"I'm sorry Lucrezia, good bye!" he whispered as he shut the hatch. The light of the room was drowned out in a tidal wave of total, pitch black darkness.

She heard the heavy footsteps outside come in. She heard her father cry out as he fell to the ground, another helpless victim against their cowardly, merciless guns. She heard them grab her mother, heard her mother whisper a silent prayer, saw the silent tears in her mind, heard them laugh before they killed her. She heard the moment of total, complete silence, the quiet before the storm, the solitude before the wave came crashing down. The silence that came before someone, some faceless stranger, some unknown soldier pushed a single, insignificant button that brought her world crashing down around her.

They murdered her family, her friends, everyone. But that wasn't all. They destroyed the rest of her world too.

~

Should I stay or go

Should I sleep or stay awake

Am I really happy or is it all

Just an illusion

~

Those memories were just like shattered glass now. But she stared in horror at the two bodies before her. And the words her father told her sank in "good bye". Why had she lived, why? Couldn't they have killed her too and taken her out of this misery? Her body was left here but her soul was completely dead. How could God take the only precious ones to her, away? "It's not fair!" she screamed. Then suddenly she remembered what her father had told her, he said to be strong, don't be afraid, so that's what she should do. "I'll never let anyone hurt me again, will that make you proud Papa?"

~

Sitting in my room now

Hiding thoughts

Just hoping one day I'll get out

~

Noin sat on her bed at the academy; a stack of books lay next to her. She had joined the military so that she could do just what her father wanted, stop the fighting. She would be so strong that no one could make her hurt the way she had before. She had loved her family and that made her weak because then her enemy had control of her emotions. If she never loved any one then she could be the perfect soldier.

But the harder she tried to be perfect the harder it became to live. She had all these emotions, fear, anger, resentment, and instead of not feeling emotions she just pretended they weren't there. So all her anger was welling up inside and she just needed someone to love her and understand her. When she met Zechs she just fell in love, he was so much like her inside, except calmer and cooler, like ice. Noin didn't think that anyone could understand her until she met Zechs. He knew everything without ever saying a word, he just looked in her eyes and saw it all. And she understood him too, even though he never showed his emotions, she knew that he loved her and that is all that mattered, she would stand by him forever.

~

I hear a voice call my name

Breaking trance, so silent

So I can stay the same

Should I stay or go

Should I sleep or stay awake

Am I really happy or is it all

Just an illusion

~

Before she knew it every view on life she had had changed, all because of him. She had known inside the truth all along and all it took was love to make her see it. She hadn't understood before what her father's words had meant. He had told her to be strong but he didn't tell her not to love. And without love strength meant nothing. Now she could be strong for Zechs, always.

~

Wait now, many things left unsaid

This life remains the same

But I change

~

She followed him for so long, and throughout it all she watched him and protected him when she could. He began making choices that no one understood and doubted, even though for the first time ever she didn't understand him she still didn't doubt that he was doing what was right. It was as if he were playing a part in a play, some are the heroes and others are the villains, no one likes the villains but without them you could not have an end to the story. So Zechs believed he had to finish the story once and for all. So still she stood by his side, hoping that one day she could finally be with him, finally they could let out all the emotions that were bottled up inside.

~

I try to fool myself in believing

Things are going to get better

But life goes on

Should I stay or go

Should I sleep or stay awake

Am I really happy or is it all

Just an illusion

~

Everyone said that he was dead but she knew he wasn't, so she continued to wait for him. She knew that one-day they would be together and every year, every, month, every minute she had waited for him would be worth it.

Finally that day did come, he came back to her and things were more amazing then ever before. She finally got to just stare into his eyes as he stared into hers, feel him caress her face and finally embrace her and kiss her as if their lives would be fulfilled just by being together. She wished that this moment would last forever, frozen in time, untouched for eternity. But even if it didn't she would never forget it, and she would still never leave his side. Even though Zechs was often far away from her, they were always together, and Zechs promised her that she'd never be alone.