prompt on tumblr from asummerevening, who asked: "things you didn't say at all" for Matthew and Alice.
Set after the latest telemovie, so spoilers for that if you haven't watched it!
He stepped closer to the morgue, his heart still hammering in his chest from earlier - he remembered how his hands shook slightly as he reached to help Alice out of the back of the ambulance.
Jean had figured it out, she'd put together the pieces like Lucien and of course went after Russell with Alice in tow. Matthew swallowed the knot of anger, fright, and worry in his throat. They'd gone after a killer, alone, but both had done extremely well. Jean came into her own as both councilwoman and an investigator; Alice had found her footing as Police Surgeon and having a larger role in the hospital at large.
He was proud - of both of them - but the incident with the ambulance jarred him to the core. There was still so much to process, but he had to check in with Alice. He had to.
Knocking on the frosted glass of the morgue door, Matthew peered around the edge of the door.
Alice looked up from cleaning autopsy equipment ("I may be the police surgeon, but no one's going to clean this morgue the way I like it," she told him a few months ago when he asked why she still did a number of the menial tasks she'd done as pathology registrar) and she smiled - her elation at catching criminals with Jean earlier still shining bright in her eyes.
God, that smile was a wonder to hold.
She rounded the autopsy table - no hesitation, no awkward dance around him like in Lucien's study - and folded her hands in front of her.
"I'd have thought you would be at the police station with Jean, Superintendent."
He gave her a half-smile, "I just came from there. I... I, uh, wanted to see you. To check in after um..."
Alice nodded, her smile softening, and she reached out to briefly squeeze his forearm.
Matthew caught her hand before she could fully retreat - her eyes widened in surprise, but she didn't let go.
He was glad, it gave him the courage to speak.
"Alice, I..."
I was scared.
I was terrified of you getting hurt.
I was worried.
I'm so proud of you and all you've done.
"I..."
I think I love you.
Alice squeezed his hand and stepped forward.
As her arms wrapped around his neck (she had to stand slightly on her toes to do it, he mused), Matthew let out the breath he'd been holding in one long sigh. He held her close as they swayed slightly - their world shrinking to just them in the quiet of the morgue.
She hugged him tight and drew back - her lips pressing a kiss to his cheek as she rocked back down on her heels.
(He kept his arm around her waist - unwilling to increase the distance between them, not after potentially losing her)
"I'm alright, Matthew."
"You almost weren't."
Alice cupped his cheek and felt her own turn warm (Must be the residual boldness from earlier, she thought).
"I'm sorry."
Matthew shook his head with a soft smile, "Don't apologize for being you, Alice."
"I can't promise I won't get into tricky situations in the future."
"I know."
"I'll try to be more careful."
He smiled again, "You're the most careful person I know."
She smiled back - her heart fluttering in her chest at the warmth in his eyes.
"I should get back to work."
Alice nodded, "Me too. I'll have my incident report on your desk as soon as I finish cleaning."
His arm slid from her waist and grasped her hand again. "No rush, I'm going to go make sure our newest constable is up to speed on procedure."
He looked down at her hand and back up at her - chewing on his lower lip as he thought.
"I'll see you tonight at Jean's?" She finally asked quietly.
Matthew smiled and nodded. Her breath caught in her throat when he leaned in and pressed a soft kiss on her cheek, close to the corner of her mouth (halfway between a friendly kiss and something more). He drew back - his smile wider - and squeezed her hand.
She knew her hesitation for their fledgling relationship (teetering between friendship and more, much more) held them back, but she worried. She worried what people would say, she worried her about her credibility, she worried all her hard work would be for nothing.
She worried about letting her walls down around someone (something told her she shouldn't worry, that she already had with Matthew.)
"Matthew, I..."
I'm sorry.
I won't change who I am.
I want this, I want us.
I'm trying.
"I..."
I think I love you.
Matthew squeezed her hand and simply smiled.
Neither one knew how to say what they wanted to, to give voice to the thoughts circling in their heads, but as Matthew let go and walked out of the morgue, Alice smiled.
They might not have been able to speak, but Alice saw one clear thought in his eyes as he left.
I'll wait.
