[A/N] This is a oneshot I wrote for a valentines exchange on AO3, but I thought I might as well post it here too. I may write more if i get the time, and if people enjoy it! Please leave comments, I welcome any feedback, as well as prompts for future chapters!
Rating may change depending on prompts and later content.
Chapter One
Rey gently suckled the small cut on her thumb. Rummaging through wreckage was something she was familiar with, so the wounds that came with it were like old friends making a visit, and she nursed the minute injury absent-mindedly as she tossed the offending debris behind her.
She was perched atop a smouldering pile of trash, the carcass of a downed Tie Fighter the resistance had harpooned from the purple sky. It was the third crash site she had been sent to investigate that day, and the monotonous chore of turning over metal chunk after metal chunk was starting to snag on her patience. She never thought that once she had left Jakku, Unkar Plutt and measly portions behind her, she would be digging through heaps of garbage again. So when master Luke sent her away to do yet another meaningless task, it put her in a rather sour mood to say the least.
Yet, it only added insult to injury. Rey had just about enough of a particular Sith Lord who was following her every move. She could not step foot on a single planet without that big, over-egoed drama queen dogging her, his black robes dramatically billowing behind him as he stalked towards her for the sixth or seventh time (she had lost count) with his shiny plastic lacky's in tow. Sometimes he tried to talk to her, other times he would just attack her, chasing her through or across whatever desolate planet she happened to be on, for whatever reason the resistance had sent her. It had got old. Really old.
Rey threw what seemed to be a fried navigational circuit over her head. She wasn't sure what is was. Did she really care anymore? She stood from her squatting position and carefully jumped from the edge of the tie fighter's now horizontal wing. With a firm tug, she lifted her staff from where it had been stuck into the soft ground and swung it around her shoulders. Draping both arms over the long rod, Rey used it to stretch the stiffness out of her back. It was funny how mattresses now made her ache, perhaps she was used to the unforgiving floor after so many years on Jakku.
She slowly scanned the area, turning her whole body as she did so. Rey shrugged, swerved the staff off her shoulders and began to trudge into the greenery that surrounded the crash site. She figured that after hours of searching, she wasn't going to find anything useful now, and decided to use this moment of solitude to take some time for herself. Oh, provided her stalker didn't decide to join in.
The planet she was dropped on was called Whiuq. She smiled briefly, remembering all the different ways she had heard it pronounced back at the resistance base. She liked it here though, the surface was green, just like Takodana, and the memory of that place filled her with as much joy as it did with fear. It was the first place Rey travelled to after she left Jakku, but also the place where she first encountered him. Rey shook her head, brushed some stray hairs away from her eyes and tried to focus on the good memories of that place, the people she met, and the elated rush she felt when she saw so much green.
She softly brushed her staff over a fern that reached her knees before stopping, no longer smelling the burn of the crash site left behind her. Breathing deep through her nose and releasing the air from her lungs through softly parted lips, she focused her energy on the force and reached out. Gentle tendrils of awareness snaked away from where she stood with her eyes closed, seeking blossoms of energy. She felt the damp undergrowth, the mulch, leaves and layers of earth. She brushed her mind against the lace canopy of the tree tops, feeling the light they filtered all the way down to her cheeks. She absorbed the peacefulness of the quiet, acknowledging the small life forms she came across and relaxing when she felt a presence no stronger than a small creature snuffling through the undergrowth for its dinner. But the best feeling of all, was she did not feel him. Rey was alone, and she smiled.
Opening her eyes again, Rey let the relief wash over her that maybe for once, she could actually be alone. Oh, she enjoyed the company of her new friends, although it had been so long since she actually wanted the company of someone else that the notion scared her, and she was still working on the concept of being touched. However she found peace amongst Finn, Poe, even BB-8. She pondered that perhaps it was the force that was showing her how to feel peaceful, but she soon realised that it was just how she wanted to feel anyway, force or not. However they understood her need for her old friend solitude. Baby steps Rey She would tell herself.
An hour had passed and Rey found herself sitting amongst a copse of trees, their trunks were wider than her arm-span. She meditated for a short moment, but soon stopped once she realised she wasn't relaxing but rather scanning the area again, as though Kylo Ren could make an appearance at any moment. Although she knew to always be alert, she chastised herself for not trusting the force as Master Luke had told her.
"Trust in the force my padawan," She heard him say "And the force will keep you safe."
Rey got to her feet and decided to continue her walk. Her mental scan of the area revealed water before, so she tapped into the feel of the flowing energy and headed in that direction.
It wasn't long before she found herself on the shore of a great lake, the glowing sky reflected on the smooth surface like a fire trapped behind glass. Not wasting any time, Rey plopped onto the silk-like sand and kicked off her boots. She eagerly pulled her socks off, stuffing them into the boots as she placed them on a large boulder that had been warmed by the setting sun. She maintained the habit of putting her shoes somewhere sand free. She also gently tucked Luke's old light sabre in there too. My light sabre she corrected herself, Luke had to keep reminding Rey that it belonged to her now.
Gingerly, she inched her toes towards the still shore line. The warm feeling enveloped her feet and Rey grinned wide. In a hurried and clumsy motion, she unclipped her belt and threw it onto the shore, shuffling her clothes off over her head. With nobody around, she decided to strip entirely, not wanting to have to walk back to her pick up point with damp undergarments. She waded into the glassy water, fanning her hands out over the surface, feeling the gentle pull on her fingertips, and the warmth surround her like a gentle caress. It was so clear and so warm, Rey thought she had found a tiny patch of paradise in the universe.
Lying on her back, she floated, feeling the ripples of her gentle movements kiss her cheeks. She connected with the force again, the quiet thoughts of peace leaking into her consciousness. Rey's mind felt heavy, the water took the weight of her body but the resounding quietness she felt within in her took her into a deep sleep.
She dreamt then. She dreamt the smell of earth filling her senses, the heavy lip of a leaf as it spilt rainfall into her open mouth, like sweet nectar that ran down her chin and filled her throat. She felt full, solid. She felt smooth, changing and elastic. She slipped through the ground and soaked into the earth, she found her way through the veins of a tree to absorb the sky, and she let the stars fall into her eyes. When she laughed, the galaxy twinkled and when she smiled, moons would turn from the sun to smile with her. The moons continued their twirl, the bright grin of their surface slowly ebbing into blackness. The dark circle started at her, the deep blackness bore into her soul and she ceased to laugh. The stars blinked out, they fell from her mouth like teeth from her gums and the sky shuddered violently. Rey fell, her heart dragging behind her, the moon growing larger, the colour of nothing crushing her, surrounding her soul and squeezing her lungs, forcing her to the ground with a loud CRACK. The moon broke and out spilled a whisper.
Rey
She awoke with such a start that the sensation of falling hit her in the face like a slap. She frantically clawed at sand before she realised she had floated ashore, her legs still dipped into the now disturbed waters of the lake.
That voice she panicked, I know that voice.
Rey scrambled to her feet in terror.
He is here.
Rey was running through the trees now. The sun had set but the stars burned so bright above her that she could see where she was going. That coupled with the guiding sense she pulled from the force, she made her way back to the crash site where she could call in a pick-up. She cursed herself repeatedly, constantly scanning the area for Kylo Ren. Force protect me she prayed.
When Rey first touched her consciousness with his, she pulled away like she had burnt herself. He was coming for her. He felt the connection too, she knew it, and while it let her know how far away he was, it also allowed him the same glimpse of distance.
When she broke into the clearing containing the downed tie fighter, she was panting violently. She ran towards the cumbersome transmitter. It was a heavy old thing, but the decision she made to leave it behind before she took off on her little getaway was now starting to feel like the worst mistake she had made. She knew she couldn't keep running from him as she desperately punched in the relay code, the heavy buttons clunking under the strained effort and Rey realised she was shaking.
Kylo Ren doesn't scare me She repeated in her mind over and over He is a man behind a mask. I am not afraid of Kylo Ren.
"Rey."
It wasn't a whisper this time.
She froze, her breathing shallow as her finger paused over the 'transmit' button. Slowly, she rose from where she had ben crouching next to the transmitter and turned, one foot at a time, towards the source of the distorted voice, a hand trained over the cool hilt of her light sabre.
Her eyes fell upon the form of Kylo Ren. He was standing at the edge of the clearing, some distance still between them. Saying nothing, Rey met his eyes, the black sockets of his mask staring back at her as they always did. They stood like this for a moment, Kylo Ren unmoving and Rey coiled like a spring. He broke the silence with a question.
"Where are your friends?" He asked, the altered nature of his voice echoing deep throughout the sill air. Rey paused and reached her awareness out towards the tree line, searching behind her surprise guest.
"Where are yours?" She asked. There were no storm troopers with him this time. Kylo chuckled at this.
"I don't have any friends." He remarked, crossing his arms in front of his chest as he took a step forward. Rey tensed and mirrored the action taking a step back and knocking the transmitter over with a dull thud, so Kylo took advantage of the stumble to advance a few steps more. His long strides closed the distance faster than he expected and Rey's hand went to her light sabre, grasping the handle tightly.
"Don't come any closer!" She spat at him, "What do you want with me monster?"
Kylo Ren stopped and tilted his head a fraction. "To talk." He said. Rey openly laughed at the suggestion.
"Talk!" Rey scoffed. "You want to talk? After tracking me down like prey, hunting me and my friends to the corners of the galaxy, you just want to talk?" She was shouting at him now, her cheeks red with the effort. "You stay away from me, you murderer! I don't want to hear anything you have to say. I hate you and I want you to leave me alone. I'll kill you if I have to! "
He advanced on her then, the space between them no more than a hand width apart. The speed of the motion took her by surprise and she gritted her teeth hard as she felt the brutal power of the dark side hold her right hand in place, it was raised and her sabre was glowing.
"Rey." He said again, as if scolding a child, "Still… you wish to kill me. You say I am a murderer yet you want to bring about death?" The low cadence of his filtered voice rolled into her ears.
The proximity of this man frightened her, and her psyche hiccupped. He hadn't been this close to her since he had her strapped to a chair on Star killer Base.
He reached down, and grasped her other hand, physically this time, and brought it up for his inspection, his thumb pressed tight into her palm. He turned it and looked at the red line scored across the pad of her thumb. He leaned close, course material of his dark robes almost brushing against her nose as he loomed over her. Rey breathed deep and slow, struggling to build up her focus on the force again. What is going on? Her mind screamed why is he touching me?
"Paper cut?" He asked. The seemingly idle remark made her eyes snap open. With all the strength she could muster, she ripped herself away from the hold he had around her limbs and forced Kylo Ren backwards, making him stumble in surprise. He looked up to see the ferocity in her eyes and the arc of her light sabre slicing through the air. It wasn't a split second before he deflected the attack with his own sabre, the cracking of energy colliding with energy sounding through the clearing.
Rey lunged for him again, the blue whirl singing through the air as it was met again with Kylo Ren's defence. He blocked her blows easily, one after the other, seemingly nonchalant against her tirade of fury. Soon, her attacks slowed and she retreated a few steps back, her footing carefully moving amongst the scattered debris of the crash. She took a defensive stance, her sabre held at an angle in front of her body that was turned on its side, her other arm out behind her as a counterweight.
Kylo Ren took the moment to admire her form. It wasn't flawless like his had been during his training, she was crouched a few inches too low, and she was too tense. He twirled his lightsabre by his side, the red arcs gracefully cutting the air as he paced around her. She turned as he circled, so her sabre was always between them.
"Rey," He tried again "You need a teacher."
"I have a teacher" She replied, deadpan. She is focusing he thought.
"Skywalker is no teacher. He teaches only weakness, only cowardice." His pacing increased and Rey raised her sabre higher between them. "I can teach you strength, I can teach you how to wield your fear, how to turn your weakness into power, your anger into fury." He stopped then, his free hand reaching to the clasp of his helmet. With a hiss, he lifted it free from his head and dropped it on the ground with a thud. "You know fury," He said, his natural voice quieter that he imposing one he is used to hiding behind.
Rey's eyes widened when she looked upon Kylo Ren's face. She had not seen him without his helmet since their fight in the snow, and the bright red scar that blossomed from his cheek crossed over his nose and up to the right side of his temple.
"Must I hurt you Rey?" He said, stepping closer again. Rey did not move. "Must I hurt those around you?" Rey's knuckles whitened on the handle of her sabre.
"What must I do to make you mine, Rey?" This time he lunged for her, the full force of his attack hitting Rey's like a metal fist. Her feet dug into the earth as she pushed back into him, before she shifts her weight to the side, deflecting Kylo's force in the opposite direction and wheeling around to defend herself from behind. He was relentless, brutal and savage. His eyes were wild, his teeth flashed white in the light of the onslaught, like a beast snarling at its prey. Rey was faltering the further the fight went on, until she was backed up against the cracked wing of the broken tie fighter. She yelped as her back hit the hard surface, Kylo using the opportunity to disarm her, sending his old masters sabre flying into gloom of the night. She flinched as heat seared across her cheek, her eyes screwed shut.
Kylo Ren had Rey pinned up against the tie fighter. She was strong and brave, but a Jedi padawan was still no match for a Sith lord. With one hand flat on the wall by the side of her head, the other drove his light sabre deep into the metal he had her trapped against.
Rey's eyes flew open and found Kylo's staring back at her, the deep darkness of his gaze burrowing into her soul, as his sabre bubbled and boiled the metal beside her cheek. She flinched and screamed, as the molten metal spat at her skin and she pooled the force within her muscles as she shoved the chest of the man who… wasn't killing her? He lost his grip on the sabre that was burrowed deep into the wing of the tie fighter and he fell backwards, a ferocious Rey beating at his chest with pounding fists. He spun to dodge her and roughly kicked the back of her knee. She cried out and fell forward, hurriedly rolling onto her back to send a kick out at her assailant in return, but he was soon on top of her, trying to pin her down. Rey snarled with fury and grappled with the man, clawing at his face to keep him at a distance. She managed to scramble out from underneath him, calling out with the force for her sabre. It flew into her outstretched hand, but not long before that hand was crushed under the weight of Kylo Ren's, pressing it to the ground and making Rey scream in frustration.
"STOP NOW!" Kylo Ren shouted, like an order he would bark to one of his storm Troopers. He was panting, and so was Rey. They were staring at each other, Rey's brow creased with anger as he held her down, his eyes searching her face, lingering on her lips… Rey struggled again and he held her fast, breathing heavily through his nose.
"Please don't make me hurt you Rey." He warned again, and Rey curled her lip in disgust at him, trying to flex her trapped hand but the pressure had started to make it go numb. He snaked his grip around her other wrist, bringing it to his gaze once more. He closed his eyes, took the wounded thumb in his mouth, and Rey's heart thumped like a war drum in her chest.
