Author's Note: Okay, so I know I still have like 3 stories started. Someone punish me for starting another one. But I just saw Thor for the first time on Saturday and then Avengers on Monday and I simply could not resist. I needed a way to vent all my Loki feels. And this seemed like the perfect creative outlet.

The story takes place right before the start of Thor. Loki returned just two short days earlier from a small trip to Earth, where he picked up a bug.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own anything recognizable. I could not imagine the things that would happen if I did.

Spoilers: Shouldn't be any.

And without further ado, I present "I Am Here."


Chapter 1

Loki Odinson was aware of only two things as he trained with his older brother, Thor: it was absolutely impossible to beat the massive god of thunder, and how miserable he was feeling. As he dodged yet another blow from his brother, he hugged his torso tightly and felt a shiver run down his spine. It was unbearably cold in the practice arena – or maybe it was just him. He knew he should be sweating the way Thor was at that moment, profusely and incessantly, but he wasn't feeling at all overheated. Rather, he felt frozen solid. A shiver ran down his spine as he went in for a weak attack that Thor easily and almost lazily deflected.

"Oh, come now, brother," he taunted with his big, booming voice that immediately irritated a throbbing in Loki's head. "I know you have more than that in you." Loki simply sneered, as was his signature. Technically, this particular sneer was supposed to say, "I most certainly do not have more than this at the moment," but because he used it so often, he knew Thor would take it as disgust or anger, or even acceptance of the challenge. That was fine by Loki, who currently did not feel like having his giant brother fretting over him all because of a slight chill, some basic fatigue, and a pathetic little headache.

And fret Thor would, especially if he found out how dizzy and nauseas Loki was feeling. The overprotective oaf would spend the entire day worrying about his brother and coddling him until he couldn't breathe. No, Loki decided it would be better to finish training and slip away to his room for a nap. He was only too aware of his own exhaustion. For reasons unknown, he had not been sleeping well the last few nights. Something, possibly whatever this was that was making him wish he were dead, was keeping him tossing and turning at night, plagued by nightmares or insomnia of the worst kind. Currently, he was ready to curl up and sleep for days.

Just as he went in for another attack, Thor swept him right off his feet in deflection. He flew a few inches forward before hitting the ground hard with a soft groan. Thor's big, booming laugh echoed all around the arena. Loki cringed as the sound hurt his aching skull.

"Nice try, brother," he chuckled, grabbing Loki by the collar and helping him back on his feet. The trickster god's head exploded in pain as he regained his footing, and he swayed unsteadily as the dizziness that had been threatening all day hit him full-force. A soft moan escaped his lips, and his eyes unfocused. He felt a large, warm hand on his shoulder.

"I apologize," Thor said earnestly. "Are you alright, Loki?" Loki shook himself mentally, trying to force himself back into reality.

"I'm fine," he snapped, shrugging off Thor's grip and forcing himself to remain strong. His breathing was heavy and his legs were shaking, but his eyes refocused and he was able to remain standing, though he felt on the verge of collapse. Thor withdrew slightly.

"We ought to go back and get ready," he said anxiously, only slightly hurt by his brother's behavior. He was used to Loki's frequent mood swings. And after all, he had just caused his brother to fall flat on his face. He should have known it would set the volatile prankster god off. "The banquet will commence soon." Loki brought his palm to his forehead. The banquet! He had forgotten all about it. Odin was putting on a big, special feast for all the nobles of the kingdom, and he had specifically requested the presence of both his sons, promptly and until the end of the event. It looked as though that nap wouldn't be happening after all.

"I suppose you're right," he said to his brother. "We should go back. That is enough for today." He was determined not to show how horribly ill he was feeling. Thor smiled, oblivious to Loki's suffering.

"Let us go then," he said and ambled agilely back towards the palace, with Loki trudging tiredly behind him. Every step he took was torture, but he forced his face into a vacant mask in case his brother was to look back. His head pounded with every footfall. His throat was becoming raw and sore, burning and aching with every tender swallow. But worst were his muscles. Everything was stiff and achy and did not want to move properly. He was on the verge of actual tears by the time he found his way into his bedchamber. He closed the door and flopped down tiredly on his bed, suddenly feeling as though he was made of lead. His eyelids were heavy, and he wanted to fall asleep right then and there, but he forced himself to remain awake. He shivered miserably, hugging his torso tightly and rubbing his arms quickly, trying to create friction. He coughed twice, sniffling and whimpering as it irritated his headache. He wanted desperately to rest, but the thought of Odin's reaction to his tardiness startled him back into action. It was with great pain, difficulty, and reluctance that he washed up and changed clothes, attempting futilely to make himself look halfway presentable.

When he was mostly ready, he examined his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He hardly recognized himself. The poor creature staring back at him was unnaturally pale and wan. Its eyes were bloodshot and glassy, its green-eyed gaze dull, its eyelids ringed in red and shadowed by dark purple bruises as if Thor had beat it repeatedly about the face. Its cheeks were pinked as though it was blushing. Loki's knees wobbled as he stood there, and he had to grab hold of the rim of the sink in order to keep from crumbling to the ground. He swallowed the lump in his throat, wincing as the muscles contracted and grated upon the rawness of it.

He had to get through the evening, he told himself. The reward was much-needed rest. He could do it. He had to. He didn't want to let his father down, nor did he want to admit to everyone he loved that he was so miserable, that this invisible force was able to incapacitate him so completely, and ultimately end up in the hands of his insanely overprotective and smothering brother.

It was this thought in particular that motivated him to move his weak legs and make his way down to the great hall. To his chagrin, Thor met him on the way down.

"You look dashing, brother," the god of thunder said, grinning from ear to ear.

"Thanks," Loki murmured, eyeing his brother suspiciously for a sign that he was being teased. When none was found, he sighed. "You don't look too bad yourself." Thor beamed even brighter.

"Why thank you," he boomed, puffing out his chest proudly. "Are you ready for this evening? It is sure to be quite exemplary."

"I suppose," Loki sighed, totally focused now on nothing but remaining upright. Suddenly, his breath hitched. There was a soft tickle in the back of his sinuses, but he would be damned if he was going to give up that easily. He forced the budding sneeze to retreat, but ended up allowing his body to betray him in a different, more mortifying way. He turned his head away from his brother and toward his inner elbow and began to cough. Thor watched in bewilderment. The coughs were loud and wet, barking and painful. They bent Loki double at the waist. His eyes watered as the tremors racked his body. He held his arm tightly across his mouth and shook with the force of his coughing fit. It felt like hot knives were flaying his lungs from inside his ribcage. It burned. Finally, however, it ended, and he was left disoriented with a very runny nose, streaming eyes, and a worried-looking Thor.

"Brother, are you alright?" He asked anxiously, rushing to Loki's side and gently touching his arm. Embarrassed, Loki's cheeks flushed even redder than they already were, and he swatted his brother's comforting hand away. He secretly wanted nothing more than to curl up in his brother's embrace and allow Thor to protect him from this hell, but there was no way he was going to say this out loud, or even show how much he craved it.

"I am fine Thor, honestly," he snapped, more harshly than was necessary. "When will you stop being such a mother hen?"

"That didn't sound good," Thor said worriedly, ignoring Loki's jabs at his concern. "Maybe I should tell father-"

"Oh for heaven's sake, Thor!" Loki cried in exasperation, becoming irritated with his brother's unease over his health. "It was nothing. Just some dust caught in my throat. Stop worrying so much." The lie rolled off his tongue quickly and easily, and with more conviction than he actually possessed at that moment. They certainly didn't call him the trickster god for nothing. He was so convincing that he almost believed himself. Almost.

"Oh," Thor said softly, feeling a trifle embarrassed as his own unnecessary fear. "Well, alright then. Let us go." Loki trailed him silently into the hall, quietly fighting with his nose in order to keep himself from sneezing and giving himself away. That had been a close one, he thought. Now, Thor would most certainly be on the lookout for anything strange, he realized. He'd have to be even more careful now not to reveal anything.

The hall looked magnificent, as usual, and the banquet was worthy of royalty. Odin undoubtedly knew how to throw a good party. Loki and his brother were introduced to all the guests in turn upon their arrival. Thor, as usual, received most of the attention, as he was the heir. On a good day, this typically would annoy Loki to no end, but not today. Today, he was glad Thor was the one who had to speak to the guests and be seen. For once, he was actually grateful that he'd never rule Asgard.

A lavish dinner was served promptly at seven, and Loki again was graced with the good fortune of not having to speak, as everyone was too busy eating and making merry to pay him any mind. As the guests all dug in, he sat in his place silently and stared down at his plate, no appetite whatsoever. In fact, just the thought of eating caused his stomach to churn painfully. Thor, meanwhile, was digging in next to him. It took him a moment or two to notice that his brother had not yet touched anything.

"Brother, why do you not eat?" Thor asked, and Loki mentally kicked himself. Of course Thor would notice this. Nothing unusual about Loki's behavior would slip his detection at the moment. So he grudgingly picked up his spoon and attempted a few swallows of the thick stew. He had thought that would be safest in his current condition. It was good, warmed him, and coated his sore throat, but it didn't ease the powerful waves of nausea that were threatening to engulf him at any moment. His brother, thankfully, seemed satisfied he was eating something and left him be.

Loki suddenly began to feel very dizzy. He continued to force spoonfuls of soup into his mouth painstakingly, but it was becoming increasingly difficult. He set his spoon down and discreetly wiped the sweat off his forehead with the back of his trembling hand. His teeth were chattering, and he suddenly felt cold and clammy. He clenched his jaw to keep from embarrassing himself in front of all these people with his incessant chattering. He looked over at his parents, who were thoroughly engrossed in an animated conversation with one of the more esteemed guests. He tried to get their attention as covertly as possible. He could no longer do this. He needed to excuse himself and retreat to the safety of his chamber, where he could feel miserable alone and in peace.

Suddenly, however, Odin stood up and announced the end of the meal, inviting everyone out to the floor for dancing. The noise of dozens of chair legs scraping across a wood floor filled the hall and caused a new eruption of pain in Loki's already throbbing head. Thor dabbed at his mouth with the cloth napkin. Then, he too pushed his chair back and grabbed his brother's hand gleefully.

"Come along, brother," he demanded excitedly. "Let us go and share a dance with the lovely Chalendaughters." The Chalendaughters were twins and dignified noblewomen, the children of Sir Chalen, a highly esteemed noble of Asgard. Thor had had his eyes on the elder of the two since he was a teenager. Now that he was coming of age to rule the kingdom, he had high hopes to marry her. Loki closed his eyes. He wanted to dance even less than he had wanted to eat, but for his brother's sake, he rose from the table.

All at once, and intense wave of vertigo and a painful onslaught of nausea washed over and attacked him. He swayed unsteadily, the room beginning to spin before his eyes. He gritted his teeth, willing himself not to vomit or pass out. He had to be strong. But his knees buckled and he fell back into his chair in a heap. Thor looked at him, the anxiety clear in his big eyes. Using this as his sole motivation, Loki made yet another valiant attempt at standing. This time, his legs held him, and he began to walk toward the open area where music was playing and people were already beginning to dance. Black spots swam in his vision. He could feel his consciousness slipping. He wanted to drop dead right then and there he was feeling so awful. But still he pushed on. He knew he could do it.

The last thing he was aware of was his brother calling out his name in alarm. Then, the ground rushed up to meet him and the whole world silently went black.


A/N: Hope you liked. As always, reviews are most appreciated. Thanks for reading, and more to come.

~PG22