Shane gave Abraham a weary smile that didn't quite reach his eyes, earning a sympathetic look and a sturdy pat on the shoulder, something he appreciated even if it didn't show on his face. It felt nice to at least have a few people that cared enough to make sure he was taking care of himself in the very least. He nodded to the man and gave him a solemn glance as he got up from the bar, sipping at his scotch lightly and gazing at the neat rows of glasses balanced behind the bar a pensive expression crossing his features as he studied the glistening glass. He didn't stir when a body settled to his right, not even acknowledging the person as he ordered, still staring through the wall before him.

"Ain't lookin' to talk, Dixon.", he said quietly, finally shifting his gaze towards his drink which had taken to sweating on the small napkin near where his folded arms rested against the mahogany bar top. The body next to him tensed and fidgeted for a moment before stilling.

"Didn't come to talk, Shane. Just came to drink.", Daryl murmured in return, causing Shane to sigh deeply. The cop rubbed at his head for a moment, an action he only did when agitated, anxious, or exasperated. Daryl took it as all three, but didn't move, remaining firmly on his bar stool.

Shane made no move to start conversation, though his body continued to grow tense gradually. The man had just grasped his drink again when Daryl's hand touched his wrist and he flinched, tensing so hard and quick the glass shattered in his palm, causing him to hiss out a sharp curse and jump up as both scotch and blood splashed over the bar top.

"Shit. Fuck, AJ, I'm sorry, man. I'll pay for it.", he said quickly, stuttering for a moment as the fresh cuts on his palm throbbed while he attempted to keep the liquid on the bar and not on the floor. The bartender shook his head lightly and grasped Shane's wrist to stop him in his panic.

"Shane, chill. Those glasses were cheap anyway. Its on me.", he said softly, lightly tugging Shane's arm closer and examining it, "Besides, you're the first to apologize for breaking one…and the first one to do it without shattering it over someone else's head."

Shane sighed at that and let AJ pluck at the remaining glass in his palm, wrapping a towel around it careful, complaining about their lack of a First Aid Kit before shooing Daryl out of the way so he could clean up the glass and spilled scotch. The cop tried to apologize again, but AJ just hushed him and told him it was on the house and he didn't need to worry, not before throwing a nasty look Daryl's way though, who looked increasingly guilty the more time passed. The dark haired cop gave one last weary look at the mess before ambling his way out the bar with his head down and collar up, looking none-too-pleased with himself or the little scene that had played out.

Daryl followed out after him once he threw a couple dollars next to his untouched drink, jogging to catch up with the male's long and quick strides. Shane let out a frustrated breath, glancing to his side as Daryl fell into step next to him.

"The fuck happened to making this easy for me? Shit. Just leave me the fuck alone. You obviously got what you wanted, Daryl. Why can't you just leave me out of it? What the fuck do you want?", he snapped, stopping and whirling to press into Daryl's space, his shoulders squaring and body barring up to full height so he could loom over the shorter male.

The Dixon didn't appear phased by the behavior, merely nervous, and he lightly fiddled with something in his pocket before pulling out a chain that made Shane's gut drop and lurch forward again. Daryl shifted from foot to foot before slipping it into the taller male's jacket pocket. "Rick…Rick wanted you to keep it…Wanted me ta as-"

"So, all this shit is for, Rick? Fucking figures. 'Course you wouldn't want to see me because you missed me or shit like that. Jesus motherfucking Christ. Fuck you, Dixon. Tell your pretty boy that I don't give a good goddamn what he wants. I don't want this. Tell him to shove it up his ass for all I care. Or yours for that matter.", Shane spat, baring his teeth as the tips of his ears flushed a light red that signaled his obvious anger. He shoved the necklace into Daryl's hands and moved back so quick it was as if it burned him to touch it. He turned tail just as quick and briskly walked off, leaving a dejected Daryl to stand in the middle of the side walk and wallow in guilt and self pity.

TWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWDTWD

When Shane got home he was alight with rage, his body filling with a sorrow so painful it made it physically hard to breath. He cursed and screamed and slammed his fist straight through the dry wall of his living room before slumping to the ground and allowing himself to indulge in his own tears. They fell thick and hot down his already red cheeks and he let out a light sob, holding his hands over the back of his head as he curled in on himself. He'd been better the past few days. His chest had felt a little lighter and his smiles came a little easier and of course Daryl Dixon had to prance up and happily watch him crumble into nothing again.

He barely slept that day and called into work that morning, opting to slump onto his couch and pass out watching old westerns he'd had buried in his closet from way back when he, Rick, and Lori used to have movie nights on Tuesdays. The memory had been bittersweet, but pleasant enough to allow him ease enough to dose off for a few hours at least. When he wakes again its from a deep sleep and due to someone knocking on his front door. It leaves him agitated, but too worn out to get angry, so instead of yelling for the person to fuck off, he actually rises and answers the door.

Rick looks over his shoulder from where he was about to move down the first step and turns slowly, locking eyes with his ex-partner. They remain silent for a moment, Shane getting nauseous and Rick getting nervous. Just as Shane begins to close the door again Rick steps forward and puts a hand on it, leaning in to keep it from clicking shut.

"Shane, please…Hear me out, broth-"

"Don't call me that….Fuck, please…Just don't.", Shane hushed reply nearly breaks Rick's heart and he presses his forehead to the door, trying to ease it further open, managing to get enough so he could halfway meet Shane's eyes. They stared at each other for a moment, and Rick saw the exact moment his ex-partner's resolve began to chip away. The sight steeled him and he pressed a hand to the door, easing it open a little more.

"Please…Shane, hear me out…I owe you an explanation..Fuck, I owe you so much more then that…At least let me give you this..", Rick muttered quietly, holding his eye, "You're right..I don't deserve to call you a brother."

Shane let out a breath so harsh it was as if Rick had punched him and he squeezed his eyes shut for a moment as if in pain, setting his forehead against the edge of the door for a moment. "Why…Can't you both just leave me alone..", he whispered so quietly Rick had to double take to make sure he heard him correctly. Shane wasn't speaking specifically to Rick, but the words were definitely aimed at him.

Rick swallowed down the tightening of his throat and leaned forward to put his hand over Shane's easing the door open slowly and slipping in before guiding Shane into his arms, the cops head plopping onto his shoulder. The shorter of the two was aware Shane didn't have enough fight in him to go against the comforting gesture, so he took advantage of the cooperation while he had the chance, smoothing his hand over the man's back, the other arm wrapped around his waist. Shane leaned into the movements and inhaled deeply, taking in a scent he knew intrinsically, taking in the form that was indubitably Rick. Familiar and warm and surprisingly comforting, reminding him of Mrs. Grimes and how she used to come up and embrace him tightly whenever he walked through the door. How Mr. Grimes would pat him on the shoulder and brag about him and his football skills to the cops he worked with. How little Loraine would curl up in his lap to watch Disney movies and fight to sit next to him at the dinner table or hold his hand as he and Rick walked her to school. It brought warmth to his chest that felt less like harsh pressure and more like what he used to feel constantly when with the Grimes family and his grandmother. Like he once felt when he was in Daryl's arms. Like he was home.

He pressed into his best friend's arms and pressed his nose to the man's neck, his arms finally coming up to grip the thinner man to him. "I've always hated and loved you, so much.", he whispered faintly into the man's neck, feeling Rick tense for a moment and then relax, arm tightening slightly around his middle.

"I've never hated you, Shane. Not once in my entire life. I don't think I ever could.", came the response, hushed and breathy against his ear, and it made him shudder lightly before he shoved his face further into the man's neck. "C'mon…Sit down with me…We'll talk a minute…Or, not at all, even…What ever you want, Shane. I'll give you whatever the hell you want."

Shane didn't answer right away, just allowed himself to be guided to sit on the couch, still pressed into Rick's side, warm and at ease for at least the moment. "You can go ahead. I just…Want to stay like this for a minute.", he uttered finally as Rick's hand trailed to rub gentle circles on the back of his neck. The action made him melt completely into the man, grumbling lightly in contentment at the sensation. That had always been a comforting action between him and the Grimes man. Rick would always press his hand to the back of his neck to calm him down or soothe him in situations like these. Always knew when he really needed it and just how to relax him. And, as much as he cursed him for it, Rick knew he needed this right now. Desperately.

"I never intended for things to turn out the way they did...Daryl approached me with a proposition. Said stuff about knowing how I looked at you as more then a brother. Stuff about how I looked at him. And, fuck, Shane he wasn't wrong. I've always loved you. I intended to wait until I could figured out how to tell you I wanted you both, but I chickened out and Daryl got impatient. I knew you wanted to marry Daryl and I was scared if I intervened that…that you'd hate me. Now, I get what I did was no better. I shouldn't have bedded with him. Especially not when I knew how you felt. I should've waited. Should've told you. Instead I-…Shane, I'm sorry.", Rick explained slowly, gingerly stroking the tender skin at the back of Shane's neck. "Never wanted any of it to go down this way…Shane, you've always been one of the most important people in my life…Brother, I've loved you for years. Daryl just..Just fell into place. It was never my intention to harm you.."

Shane, again, remained quiet, processing the information slowly, thinking over Rick's confession as best he could. Eventually he shifted and placed his hand on the one that was resting on his thigh and held it lightly.

"You never said anything…About wanting me, I mean.", he uttered quietly, easing as Rick's hand grasped his in return, hoping to bypass the main problem for at least a moment, conflict the last thing he wanted this morning.

"I never thought you were interested in men. You never mentioned it and I knew how your dad was…I was too afraid to loose you. So, I settled in with Lori. Don't get me wrong. I loved her. I still do. Even with the divorce, but it could never amount to what I've felt for you over the years.", the male responded softly, caressing his thumb across the top of his ex-partners hand, rubbing circles into the warm skin comfortingly.

Shane sighed at the words and contemplated them for a long moment before fidgeting and sitting up, leaning forward to scrub his hands over his face and then through his hair in exasperation and slight frustration. Like he was having trouble processing or the results of his contemplation weren't making sense or irritated him. So, Rick remained quiet, silently mourning the loss of Shane's warmth against him and pressed under his chin. He resisted the urge to reach out and smooth a hand down his back or at least hold his shoulder like he normally would have, knowing Shane needed space to comprehend the situation.

Shane was distinctly aware of the fact Rick was a shit liar. He'd never seen a reason to do so unless it involved a threat, like in an interrogation room or someone was questioning him and his methods. Most lies were professional and thought out and of more benefit then just saving his own ass. Shane could tell regardless of that type they were anyway. Rick's left eyebrow would twitch lightly inwards and he'd cock his head to the right slightly as if he were questioning himself for saying something that wasn't true. A small tick picked up by Mr. Grimes himself. Even in a professional setting, Rick could still give himself away under the right eyes, and Shane had known him for so long he could pick up the signs from a mile away. Rick wasn't lying to him. Hadn't since he entered the house.

After a moment Shane looked back at the deputy, feeling a confusing wave of affection wash over him at the sight of Rick all sitting straight and nervously wiping the palms of his hands on his uniform pants. This may have been the man who slept with his boyfriend, but it was still the one he grew up with. The Rick Grimes who spilled Coke all over Lori on their first date because he was so nervous he tripped. The Rick who took the fall for a school fight so Shane wouldn't get suspended. The Rick who showed up to every football game whether it was home or away, even once when he had the flu and slept through half of it. The Rick that he knew intrinsically and knew him intrinsically. The Rick that showed up on his doorstep, even at risk of getting punched in the face or worse, because he knew Shane needed explanation and comfort and that he wouldn't have accepted it from any one other then him. The Rick he'd loved since they were six, brotherly or not.

Rick fidgeted under the gaze before his eyebrows shot up as Shane leaned in, cupping the side of his face. Shane didn't close the gap fully, keeping enough space that their noses were just barely brushing, but Rick could feel the man's heat and his warm breath on his lips and the strong hand against his jaw and his eyes fell half lidded in elation. He stayed still for a moment before reaching his own up to brush over the one at his cheek, cupping it in return and turning his head to press a soft kiss to the cops palm. Shane's own gaze fell half lidded in return, this look less bliss and more adoration, and for a second Rick couldn't breathe right.

"Shane…?", Rick breathed out, the name holding an unspoken question that showed plainly in those too blue eyes. Shane answered with a barely there nod before they met one another halfway, the touch hesitant, testing. Each movement was delicate and withdrawn, both too scared to go much further then innocent touches of lips for the moment. They kissed like that for what felt like hours, all sweet motions and feathery caresses as their hands came up to tentatively cup cheeks and necks and card slowly through hair.

They both pulled back mildly dazed yet hyperaware of their position, lips tingling and cheeks warm, breath slightly heavy due to both of them holding it as they'd kissed. Their gazes locked for a few seconds before Rick was breathily chuckling and caressing his fingers down the side of Shane's face, gazing at him as if he wasn't real. As if he were a figment of his imagination and touching him was the only way to ground himself to reality. To prove Shane was really there. The action made the taller of the two smile warmly, an action that finally reached his eyes for the first time in weeks, and Rick made a weak noise, pulling Shane down for one more kiss before he laid their foreheads together.

"Fuck, Shane…I've been wantin' that, for…..For years.", Rick muttered softly, smoothing his thumbs over Shane's cheekbones, rubbing at them with gentle care. He leaned in and kissed Shane softly a few times, tentative and sweet before gently mouthing at his jaw, shifting his lips over the smooth skin before lightly pressing a kiss to his pulse point. He caressed his mouth back up to Shane's, feathering them together before shifting to kiss his temple, drawing Shane closer to him. "Been wantin' you for years.."

Shane was left surprised and breathless by the words, a flush spreading over his cheeks and tinting the tops of his ears. He let out a weak sound and his head fell back, allowing Rick to mouth and kiss over the expanse of his neck, desperate to be showered in love and affection after so long. The fact Rick seemed so solemn and truthful made his gut churn in affection and warmth and made his body heat up and tingle pleasantly. He tightly gripped at Rick's arms, allowing himself to be situated onto the couch, sprawling back down and tipping his head to allow the deputy's lips to travel wherever they pleased.

"Rick..", he groaned out when the male's finally took to lightly nipping and biting at the skin, one of his hands sliding up his arm to cup the back of the cops neck, tangling in the loose curls there. The male on top of his shuddered at the sound and he felt something twitch against his leg, a matching groan of approval leaving Rick's throat. He let out surprised grunt as the deputy's hips rolled sharply against his own, the sudden friction leaving him gasping and withering under the shorter of the two. Rick cursed under his breath at the feeling and pulled back, appearing to try to collect himself somewhat before he leaned down to softly peck Shane's lips.

"Maybe…Maybe we should slow down a little. Been waitin' for this for so long…Don't know how well I'll be able to handle myself so quick.", he said softly, lightly stroking at Shane's side as he pressed their foreheads together in a steadying motion, trying to ground himself. "Still need ta talk to Daryl, too…", he added, softer and more hesitant, as if he wasn't sure if saying the simple word was alright just yet.

Shane quieted and looked away, thinking back to the events that had been taking place for the past month and a half, grimacing at the recollection. Rick appeared uneasy again and softly trailed his fingers over the larger male's side in hopes of soothing him, sighing in relief when Shane's sad eyes moved back to his, conflicted and hurt. Rick dipped down and pressed a slow kiss to the male's forehead before shifting to settle onto the couch, helping Shane sit up beside him and drawing him close, back into their original position. He smoothed a hand over the male's back and gave a weary sigh, pecking Shane's forehead lightly before he began to speak.

"Brother, I know…I know full and well what we've done is wrong. Unforgivable. But, you heard my peace. Listened. You forgave me in a way. I know you're still bitter. I don't blame you. Not even a little. It would have been justified if you'd kicked me out into the damn yard like a dog and told me you never wanted to see me again. What happened between me and Daryl stemmed from my love for you. He got impatient. You know how he is. All action, few words. He got tired of waiting for me to grow a pair and 'fess up. He said he'd known you'd at least like me back. 'Figured our history had it written in the stars s'pose. I don't fully well and why he wanted me in the picture s bad or why he initiated it in the first place, but I do know he's been pissier'n a wet cat for the past month in a half worried about you. He's asked me multiple times if I'd heard from you or if you were alright and hinted several times he wanted to come see you."

"I assumed you wouldn't fancy him moseying around again, so I tried to make him lay low. I'm guessin' yesterday was some wild attempt to get some reaction out of you, but looks ta me like you gave him the opposite of what he was expectin'…I'm not going to ask you to do anything. Hell, I won't even ask you to be with me after all the shit I've put you through…But, sweetheart, he has his peace to speak to…And, I feel as though you more then deserve to hear it, whether you like it or not.", Rick finished gently, hand venturing up to lightly cup the back of his best friend's neck.

Shane hummed softly in response, giving a sigh and a weak nod, head tilting away from the gentle touch for only a moment before his body leaned into Rick's. He knew full and well Rick was gullible. For all the shit he talked and how well he talked it, he was an easy man to read. He was confident and fierce when necessary, but indubitably sweet and naïve at times. Built upon this hero-complex Mr. Grimes had always had. A need to serve-and-protect. To see the good in everyone and the possibility of bad. Shane had always figured that's what kept Rick around, the man's desire to help and save everyone. And, back when they were kids, Shane had definitely needing saving. He also knew Daryl was a man who needed saving just as equally, someone just, if not more so, broken then him. Scars proved that, scars and flinches and an aversion to touch proved it without doubt.

Shane had always figured that's what had drawn them to each other. A similar past mixed with a need for gentle yet firm touch that had them swirling together in a cocktail of stability and assurance. They had been two sides of the same coin, Daryl turning out quiet and timid whilst Shane brash and over confident, both hiding behind a façade of confidence, bold words, and a rough outer exterior to protect them from not only ghosts but potential relapses.

Now, Shane could only assume by default that maybe their similarities were the reason Daryl was drawn to Rick in the first place and what had eventually drawn Rick to him. This sweet, kind hearted man currently holding him through his worries and fears, the man that had been by his side since very nearly the beginning. Rick was a man who wanted to save everyone he could, regardless their situation. A good man who would do just about anything for any one. So, Shane could only assume they'd have come together at one point or the other. His broken boyfriend and golden hearted friend. It made sense in the greater outlook of things. Rick trying to save Daryl and Daryl begging to be saved.

Even along with the sense it made the sensation of not being enough made his stomach churn and body ache with the idea of inadequacy. Regardless of whether or not the hurt had been intentional, Rick was still showing him up in a way. Putting pieces of Daryl back together that Shane had never managed to get to fit right. But, even still, as uncomfortable and unwelcome as the sensation was, it still put him to ease in some small way. Even if it wasn't him helping Daryl at least some one was. At least he was getting the help and love Shane had always thought he deserved. In the grand scheme of things, Daryl was a good man. He always had been to Shane and obviously to Rick as well. Despite the shadows of his past, he fought to help and serve-and-protect as much as Rick did. Cared deeply for those close to him and would die protecting them without a second thought. Self-sacrificing and good.

Shane let out a quiet, dejected noise and sighed deeply before speaking. "Not now…I just..I just want to sit…Like this. Later…Later. Just not now. Just stay. For tonight. Please.", he uttered, quiet and with much less force then he intended. He wanted to sound stronger, confident like he had before the cheating went down. Before Daryl had left. But, he couldn't. The event had chipped away part of his resolve, part of his being altogether. Chipped away some part of his self preservation and left him weak. But, that couldn't be helped and he didn't have it in him to try and grasp it or feel sorry for himself. He was tired and his head was beginning to hurt and Rick was warm and solid against him, ground him for the moment and he didn't have it in him to do much more then lay in Rick's arms and sleep for the next eternity, or, at the very least, until tomorrow.

Rick shifted beneath him and pressed his face into his hair, nuzzling it for a moment before pulling back with a nod. "Yeah, Brother. Whatever you want. Do whatever the hell you want. Give ya whatever the hell you want. Just let me take you on up to bed and we'll deal with everything else in the morning. C'mon. Just down the hall and we can sleep all ya want.", Rick said softly, hushed and pained like it hurt to see him like this. He helped a slumped Shane to his feet and guided him down the hall, lightly kicking the door open. After a moment of helping the dark haired man out of his jeans he settled him down on the bed, purposefully not taking note of the mess or the empty bottles of Brandy sitting on the bedside table, before shrugging out of his own uniform to get comfortable. Once he was down to his boxers and t-shirt and shifted under the covers on the opposite side of Shane, sliding in close to wrap an arm around his ex-partner.

It didn't take long for Shane to pass smooth out, body slumping against Rick's and pressing into his side, face buried in his neck as he slept. Rick sighed soft and stroked at Shane's side, keeping him close, not perturbed by his quiet snores or closeness. He remained awake for a long time, just laying silent and still and listening close to his ex-partner's breathing and thinking of the wild month and the events before and the possibilities of after, tracing patterns on the ceiling with his eyes and shapes on the skin peeking out from under Shane's shirt until his sharp blues began to droop closed. He turned his head to press a lazy kiss to his sleeping friend's forehead, keeping his lips there for a moment before he tucked his chin over the male's head, tugging him closer.

"I'll give you anything you want.."