Title: Through the Eternal Return (Torchwood/Who crossover)
Rating: PG-13 to be safe, although it's pretty tame
Summary: After his second encounter with the 456, Jack leaves Earth to escape his memories and begins his search for redemption. In the meantime, the 13th Doctor visits 28th century Earth and finds that things have gone horribly wrong. He soon discovers that it all leads back to five fateful days in early 21st century Britain. Now he must race against time to right past wrongs and save the Earth.
Characters/Pairing: Jack/Ianto; otherwise, gen.
Spoilers: Children of Earth, nothing specific in Doctor Who.
Length: 59 chapters. 58,360 words. Complete.
Disclaimer: Any recognizable entity within the story is the property of its intellectual owner. No profit is being made from the use of these entities.
Note: This is my first fanfic in nearly 10 years, first time writing Torchwood (obviously), the first project to go over 900 words, and from my first time doing NaNoWriMo. Fic is complete so I will try to update daily although I am a graduate student and my time is no longer my own. Also, story has not been edited or beta'd, mainly because I am too busy reading until my eyes bleed for school. I'd like to think it is readable but please don't hesitate to leave constructive criticism. I know what I think I need to improve upon and advice is always welcome.
Prologue
Eternal Return
What, if some day or night a demon were to steal after you into your loneliest loneliness and say to you: 'This life as you now live it and have lived it, you will have to live once more and innumerable times more' ... Would you not throw yourself down and gnash your teeth and curse the demon who spoke thus? Or have you once experienced a tremendous moment when you would have answered him: 'You are a god and never have I heard anything more divine.' [341]
• The Gay Science: With a Prelude in Rhymes and an Appendix of Songs by Friedrich Nietzsche; translated, with commentary, by Walter Kaufmann (Vintage Books, March 1974)
When a person has experienced a sufficient amount of pain and trauma in his or her life, it is only natural for that person to try to reinvent themselves. To try to escape from the unending pain of memory. When that pain lives inside of you, is so deeply a part of who you are and who you become, can you ever truly escape from it? Or will it haunt you? Will every man in a suit, every whiff of coffee, the sight of an overcast sky, the color of your eyes in the mirror bring it back to you?
Does one ever escape their lonely, sad, angry, disappointed moments? Or do they follow us forever, hiding in the deep recesses of memory, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike and bring us to our knees, the strength of emotion brining us to our knees?
Can our happy, joyful memories ever do the same?
Or are our negative emotions too strong to allow any other feeling to share its crevices and hiding places in our minds? Are we doomed to live in fear of suffering through our sorrows at the slightest hint of memory but search vainly for the pleasures from our lives until the day we die?
Does the inevitability of suffering and search for happiness make us human or drive us away from our humanity when we need it the most?
