Alright kids! Gather 'round, it's time to sing the alphabet! Let's learn our ABC's with the help of Final Fantasy VII.
A is for Aerith, also known as Aeris because her name was translated into English wrong.
The letter B stands for Barret; surprisingly he isn't thought to be a terrorist. I know I would be with a machine gun for a hand.
Who do you like better? Clerith/Cleris or Cloti?
D is for Denzel; why is he in Advent Children? He was never in the original…
E can be for emo, describing Cloud's personality in AC.
Final Fantasy VII is better than Final Fantasy VIII. No competition.
G is for the Gold Saucer. Who will your date be? Tifa? Yuffie? Aerith/Aeris (see letter A-again)? Or Barret (shame on you)?
H stands for Highwind, a million times better than the Tiny Bronco
Iflana makes letter I, also making the joke Ifalna Aerith/Aeris didn't die.
J is for those weird looking incarnations of Jenova, Sephiroth's dearest mother.
K is the first letter of Kadaj, who picked up the materia now the size of a tennis ball instead of a ping pong ball.
Loz is L; his cell phone ring tone is Victory Fanfair, played in the original FFVII.
M is for Mako Juice; not as good as Ma's home-squeezed OJ, but still great with your toast!
Letter N stands for Nanaki, son of Seto.
The fifteenth letter is O. Let's have a moment of silence for Omnislash, the kick-ass Limit Break that kills Sephiroth. ……… Moment is over.
Let's represent P with Phoenix Downs! What a life saver those are - literally. Just remember, they don't always work -points to Aerith-!
Q stands for that dreadful materia quest. Damn you, Yuffie!
Rufus is for R. We all thought he died until we say him in Advent Children.
S can be for Scarlet, that b!tch you slap on the Sister Ray.
T is for Tifa; can her boobs get any bigger?
U's for Underwater, rising to the surface because you're deathly afraid of Emerald Weapon.
Letter V stands for Vincent Valentine, one bad-ass mofo, and protagonist of Dirge of Cerberus, the low-rated yet addicting spin-off.
Weiss deserves W just to acknowledge his extreme, gravity-defying hair.
X is for the wonderful item X-Potion. Whatever would I do without it?
Hmm, how about Y for Yazoo? Remember him? He was yet another character of the Final Fantasy VII world with silver hair.
Z is for Zack, the awesome, lovable character of Crisis Core. He's also got some of the best lines in the game. Including "No way, he just ate my hair!" and "Me? Gongaga."
Now we know our ABC's! Thanks to the help of Final Fantasy!
There's hundreds more I could've done. Feel free to make up some yourself. It's actually really fun!
As always, reviews are appreciated.
