Misaki was my everything.

Misaki is my everything.

But what am I to you, Misaki? Am I just a pest that annoys you? That interrupts your precious time at HOMRA?

Or am I something more? Do you think of me as an enemy? A traitor?

Do you hate me?

If so, then I am glad. I am glad that you feel something for me. I am glad to have your eyes on me even if it is because of hatred.

Those fiery orbs that show me anger and hatred, I hope they don't lie. You see, they are very precious to me; I want those emotions to be pure.

I hope that they are not tainted.

There was a time when I wanted your friendship, your love; but that time is long gone. I know I can't have them. Those feelings, they were not for me, were they? They will never be mine.

So instead, can I have your hatred?

Can you feel something for me, that is only for me?

After joining HOMRA, you threw your smiles here and there. Your laugh, your hugs, your love, your friendship, none of them became reserved for me. They were scattered here and there.

They lost their meaning to you.

It would have been enough, a rare smile directed at me. But then again, none of your smiles remained rare. But the cause of your brightest smile, he became the cause, didn't he?

Your trust, your love; they are given away thoughtlessly but not your hatred.

Your hatred is not directed at just anyone.

Yes, you claim to hate everyone who troubles your HOMRA family. But the degree of hatred you claim to have for me, gives me a feeling of relief; relief that you won't act indifferent towards me.

Our frequent fights that I start, they are how I assure myself that your anger and hatred won't die anytime soon.

During our battles, I am the only one you see. Your eyes, they are focused at me. I cannot help but feel a little nostalgic. It feels like there are only the two of us in the world and nothing, no one else.

But Misaki, I am beginning to see that there is no purity in your hatred. You get worried when I get serious injuries; you even try to mend our broken friendship but I haven't let that happen.

You don't truly hate me do you?

What you feel for me is not hatred; it is a mixture of emotions. That is not good. Have a single emotion, a strong emotion for me. You have mixed feelings and none of them are too strong. They will eventually disappear and I will just become a memory, someone from the past.

I don't want that. I don't want the only person in my world to feel nothing for me.

Your hatred for me, I hold it dear.

Because as long as you hate me

I will be happy.

Today is a new day. This day too, I will pick a fight with you, I will speak hurtful words and I will make you angry.

Today too, you will shout empty threats. I know that you can't kill me.

But Misaki, I hope that someday you will hate me. Not just with words but with your soul.

That day I will be the happiest I can be.