Don't take my stuff without permission, this includes my best liquor. Asking JARVIS or Pepper in my absence doesn't count. The same applies if you walk into R&D and ask me while Dr. Banner and I are loudly working
If you have superhuman strength try NOT to break my stuff or anyone here. I'm looking at you Shakespeare in the park and Capsicle
If your name isn't Dr. Bruce Banner or Tony Stark you are NOT allowed to cause explosions in R&D. The lone exception to this rule is if your name is Dr. Eric Selvig or Jane Foster
No one is allowed to break a cup, glass, bowl or plate if he/she really enjoyed the beverage or meal that it was served in. This shall forever be known as "The Thor Rule"
Use of the n-word is allowed and by n-word, I mean "nerd"
Knives, arrows and other pointy objects/weapons will only be thrown/launched on one of the designated weapons training levels. This shall forever be known as the "BlackHawk Rule"
If you're a 90-Year-Old virgin super soldier or answer to the nickname "Point Break" and you're confused by 21st century technology just ask JARVIS for help instead of breaking said technology out of frustration
DO NOT delete episodes of The Big Bang Theory from mine, Dr. Banner's or the communal living room's Tivo. The blond chick is hot and "the other guy" doesn't like missing out on the physics jokes and experiments those nerds say and do every week…neither do I
If you're grocery shopping make sure to pick up Pop Tarts/"Tarts of Pop" or else a certain demi god will ruin breakfast for everyone. This shall forever be known as the "The Other Thor Rule"
Clothing is NOT optional UNLESS your name is Pepper Potts, Natasha Romanoff, Jane Foster or Darcy Lewis. Or, you've turned into an enormous green rage monster, this will be void once Stark Industries has successfully created clothing that will conform to any man's rapidly fluctuating body figure
Author's note: Thanks for reading! I have actually posted an Avengers fic that is currently a work in progress, it's titled, Absence.
