He'd been tortured a great many times over his years. Atrocitus himself, numerous factions from various wars, everything he'd done to try to keep Illana safe... in the end, of course, he'd failed miserably and the greatest torture, he realized, came from his own mind as he replayed finding the love of his life dead, abused and beaten across the ground, unable to look at him or comfort him with her love any longer.
He's not even sure how long she's been gone by now, it feels like a few good lifetimes, but now there is Aya- the simple robot intelligence that is basically just the Green Lantern ship, who happens to have taken Illana's likeness from his own memories. He had been in denial about that whole situation, not wanting to admit that she had done that to him, so callously taken her face, but she had- and it had been merely further proof that she was but an artificial intelligence who had no true grasp of emotions.
And now he's here, sprawled out on the floor of the invaded ship, various Red Lanterns and Atrocitus' sympathizers wandering around, kicking him with each pass. He barely registers them until she arrives and stares down at him, her usually soft eyes deep red, angry. Bitter. "Look at you," she hisses, leaning down by him till they're eye to eye. "So weak. So pathetic."
He shakes his head. "This isn't you talking," he groans. "Aya would never..."
She spits at him- artificial intelligence have spit?- and laughs, leaning back. "Aw, so naive still, despite everything you'd been through." She moves back to her feet and paces around him as if she likes what she sees so much that she needs to see it from every angle. "Like what happened with Illana-"
"Don't say her name!" he thrashes weakly, impotent and unable to stop this, help Aya or anyone else. He's not even sure where Hal Jordan and Kilowog are, having lost them somewhere in the fighting. His own power, pushed to the limits from the impossible pressure of pure space around them, had drained rapidly while they were trying to regain control of the ship, and he's disgusted to remember how he had been slowing both Green Lanterns up as they used their rings to shield him and keep him from drifting off into the dark nothingness of space. Without the power of the rings, he would've suffocated within seconds.
"Why shouldn't I? You couldn't protect her then, you can't honor her memory now. What purpose are you? A whole galaxy will be destroyed and it will be your fault," she says, bemused. "If you had just used your anger to other purposes- if you had just kept your red ring charged to full power- if you had just stayed with Illana to begin with!" Hearing this from her face, in Aya's voice, eats him alive twice as fast and he just wants to curl up into a ball and die.
But Hal Jordan and Kilowog are fighting, fighting, fighting, somewhere, and he refuses to let them find him like this, lifeless and pathetic at the feet of Aya. "You will not accomplish what you are trying to," he tells her. Before she can say anything, he recovers enough strength to kick out, sending her crashing to the ground with a rough cry. He regains his footing, leaning over her even as the few Red Corp members aim their weapons at him, all of which would easily be his end while his ring is drained, but he ignores them, all of his focus on the artificial intelligence at his feet. "Aya..."
She seems to be struggling, her eyes shifting from blue to red so fast that they almost look purple, and all he can do is watch. "Razer," she chokes out, sounding like herself, "Ra- Razer..." There's the sound of a energy blaster charging nearby and he looks up, the glow of the beam reflecting in his eyes. "NO!" Eyes flashing with a furious kind of blue, he's nearly blown back as a bright green shield erects before him, blocking the attack before it even gets close. It even reflects the attack, sending it full force into the group of Reds scattered around, knocking them into walls and knocking them out.
He looks down at her once more, shaking his head. "Aya...how did you-?"
She makes it back to her feet, staring at him in her usual way. "I saw you in danger and... somehow, it gave me the strength to correct what damage the virus had done to my components, quarrantine it." She examines his grey form and shakes her head- "You have lost your powers," she muses. "We must find your charger." He nods, following her through the dim hallways. "Your charge should have lasted longer than this, why didn't it?"
He swallows and looks away, not wanting to explain just yet. When they arrive at his quarters, he puts in an access code and slips inside, Aya following quickly afterwards. As he locates the charger and holds the ring up to it, he stares at her. Softly mouthing the words, he slowly pledges his allegiances to Atrocitus and all things dark and evil, the air around them almost thrumming with the darkness caused just by this.
She looks as confused as an artificial intelligence can, stepping towards him. "Why are you saying those things? Did my alternate wording not work?"
Back at partial strength now, he looks at her through the slowly growing haze of red. "I didn't want to tell you," he explains lowly. "It wasn't sufficient- these are the words I must chant or the charger doesn't activate. My powers faded because... the more time I spend along the Green Lanterns, the more I want to not say them. If I had known that it could've been the turning point in this whole mess, I would've put that aside... maybe if I had, they wouldn't have gotten control of the ship- of you..."
She remains silent as he puts the charger away, close to full strength once more. "I apologize, Razer. I was merely trying to think of a way to make it easier for you."
He looks surprised, turning back towards her. "It's fine, Aya. I put myself down this path long ago and I have to live with it... but if this power gets rid of Atrocitous in the end, then it's worth it. Now, let's go take back our ship."
"Yes," she agrees. "Let's."
