WARNING: This story involves depression, thoughts of suicide, and attempted murder. Just letting you know.
Alone. Sad. Mad. These feelings best described how Haven felt as his escape-pod hurdled through space. He had just narrowly escaped getting captured by his species' enemy; the Irkens. They had arrived in thousands on the one day of the year that his people let down their guard.
And it was technically his fault. The Carroian boy had once trusted an Irken and even assisted her in escaping from prison after she got captured.
The action, Haven had thought before, would never cause any harm to the planet he lived on. He was wrong. The Irken invader he helped told her rulers all about Carro; everything from the national food to the day of the year they let down their defenses. Now, Haven was the reason his family and his people were either being murdered or were being forced into a horrible life as a slave to the Irken empire.
His father was most likely executed, because his father is-or at least, was the ruler of planet Carro. The rest of his family probably are being tortured or are now serving the Irkens. All because he thought an Irken was his friend.
A beep from the escape pod jolted Haven from his thoughts. Looking at the screen, he saw that they were approaching a planet named 'Earth'. Haven knew about Earth. Carro discovered Earth about a decade or two and had once sent a squad of Carroians to check it out. They came back with knowledge of new cultures and languages.
The only Earth language he had fully learned was a language called 'English', so he chose a random city in the United States. After pressing the 'ok' button, the pod then adjusted itself and aimed itself at the destination he had chosen. Haven sat down and looked down at his feet as the escape pod entered the Earth's atmosphere.
~
When the pod landed, the Carroian boy looked out the window and saw a large group of trees. Thinking back to his studies, he remembered that this is what humans called a 'forest'. He was happy he had landed, but wasn't happy where he landed. Forests are filled with dirt and germs; two things hated on his home planet. Taking a deep breath, he opened the pod door and walked outside.
Haven found the Earth air surprisingly fresh. One of the things he had learned about Earth were that there were places with dirty, polluted air. His tutor had put a bit much emphasis on that fact that he thought the entirety of Earth air was polluted. He walked around the forest, looking for any sign of civilization while breathing in the air.
It was a few minutes before he encountered any sign of life. He had heard the sound of feet trudging through the forest and he panicked, realizing he had no disguise and that a blue boy with horns would freak a human out.
He climbed a nearby tree and hid behind leaves as something leaped into sight. It was a deer. The boy let out a sigh of relief and climbed back down the tree, startling the deer in the process. Upon getting down, Haven leaned against the tree, slightly exhausted from all the walking and climbing. He wasn't exactly the most fit Carroian out there. Especially, seeing it was rare for him to go and play with other kids when he was younger; he had always found books and his older sister better companions.
As he rested against the tree, thinking about his family, his stomach growled. A sudden craving for pizza hit him, causing him to forget about his family.
Knowing he'd probably starve if he didn't keep going, he once again set off.
~
Around half an hour later, he had stepped out of the forest and into a street. Looking around, he saw a large metal object heading straight toward him. Jumping back, he narrowly missed getting hit by a car.
He suddenly remembered the fact he had no disguise. He went back into the forest and looked down at his clock. Pressing a few buttons, a holograph popped out of it and a female voice started to speak.
"Hello, citizen of Carro! You are in need of a disguise. Swipe through the disguises to match the one that best fits your situation."
An array of disguises popped up in a variety of species and races. Swiping, Haven looked for one for planet Earth. He then found one that changed his skin color from light blue to a light peach color. He then thought about his horns. He patted his head, trying to decide if his fluffy, caramel brown hair would hide them. He nodded, determining that his horns weren't very big, so they could easily be hidden. He gave a weak smile and set off into the human world.
~
The next day, Haven sat in an Earth house he had found the day before. He had noticed it because unlike the other houses he had seen, this house had an abandoned look to it. So he snuck in, and thankfully, it WAS abandoned. Upon entering the house, the Carroian realized there was still furniture left. The rooms were neatly furnished, even if they were a bit dusty, and there was still some food in the pantries. He even found a safe with several hundred dollars, so he wouldn't go hungry for a while.
Haven had also signed up for skool. He was able to convince them he was his mom by speaking in a high-pitched voice on the phone.
Glad he had such good luck on his first day on Earth, he looked out the upstairs window and waited for 8.
As he looked out the window, a family walked past the house, suddenly reminding Haven about his family.
His face darkened and he backed away from the window. Sitting on the bed, he sighed.
Thoughts of his mother being forced to do whatever the Irkens tell her to flashed in his mind. He imagined his father getting beheaded and his younger sister getting kicked when she cried. He also imagined his elder sister being abused and tortured by the Irkens. These thoughts squeezed all the happiness the beginner's luck he had on Earth brought.
The only feelings the thoughts had left were grief and resentment of the Irken Empire.
An other thought quickly passed through his mind, but it disappeared as soon as he thought of it.
He tried to figure out what the thought was but quickly gave up for the clock read 8 o' clock.
~
Haven stood in front of a classroom of students as Ms. Bitters spoke to them.
"Class, this is Haven Watterson. He is the newest student."
The teacher then spun around and got in Haven's face.
"If you have anything to say, say it NOW." she hissed, frightening the Carroian.
Haven shook his head and the scary old woman got back behind her desk. She pointed to a desk behind the kid in one of the front rows.
"Sit behind Zim."
The child sitting in the seat suddenly disappeared with a scream, leaving the seat empty.
Haven then trudged over to his seat and sat down without looking up to see who he was sitting by.
Ms. Bitters once again started to speak, this time she spoke about how the universe would destroy itself and would end horribly. As Haven started to zone out the morbid ramblings of the teacher, a voice snapped him out of it.
"Hello, human worm-baby! The mighty Zim welcomes you!"
Haven looked up at the voice who spoke and he almost had a heart-attack when he saw who it was.
In front of him, sat a Irken wearing contacts and a stupid looking wig.
Haven stared in horror as the Irken continued to speak.
"Don't listen to anything the Dib-filth says; I am not from a mighty alien race that intends on invading Earth. I AM NORMAL!" he shouted getting a dirty look from the teacher.
The Carroian just stared, aghast.
"No..." he whispered to himself, the emotions he felt this morning once again coming after him.
He raised his hand and quickly asked something.
"May I use the restroom!?"
Ms. Bitters grunted before continuing to tell the children about the future of the universe. Haven quickly stood up and retreated to the bathroom.
~
Haven sat with his head on his knees in a dirty bathroom stall.
Normally, the neat Carroian wouldn't dare set foot in anything as filthy as a public bathroom, but the despair he was feeling made him forget all about the germs.
"Oh, not here, too..." he muttered to himself as tears rolled down his face.
Haven wept as he thought about how the Irkens would invade this planet like they did his.
He didn't have an attachment to anything on this planet yet, but the thought of his enemies getting more slaves and ending more innocent lives greatly saddened the boy.
Before the Irkens had invaded Carro, the boy would have talked to his sister when he was sad, but she wasn't here and he had no other way of coping with this much grief.
The thought he have gotten this morning once again appeared in his mind. This time, it stuck.
When it entered his mind, Haven's eyes widened in fear.
"Oh, no...! No...!" he whispered, shaking his head at his own thoughts. But the more he disagreed with the thought, the more pleasant a solution it seemed.
Silent, Haven thought about it. The thought grew and grew and he started to agree with it.
The sound of the bathroom door opening caused the Carroian to jolt right up.
"Haven? Ms. Bitters wished for the MIGHTY ZIM to come get you filthy pig."
Haven opened the door and faced the Irken.
The thought once again danced around in his head.
"Ok..."
But an other thought popped in Haven's head. He gaped at the small Irken and then quickly walked back to class.
~
Haven sat on the bed, conflicted. The two thoughts that had popped up were both dark, but very tempting. Both involved death. Haven personally prefered the second one, but he didn't know if he'd be able to do it. He had the resources to do it and he really wanted to do something that'd hurt the Irken Empire, but if he had the guts to do it, he didn't know.
The boy thought carefully, thinking out how both thoughts would end. The first thought ended with him lying on the floor of this house covered in his own blood. The other ended with him covered in Irken blood. Upon thinking about the endings, Haven chose being covered Irken blood.
~
The brown-haired boy took long strides down the sidewalk, a knife hidden in his sleeve.
"Father wouldn't approve of this..." a part of Haven thought as he walked to the place he suspected was Zim's house.
"But, his people will destroy an other planet if I don't do this." an other part of him thought.
Haven tried not to think about the deed he planned to do as he went on his way.
His thoughts continued to fight among each other until he reached an aqua green house with a purple roof. In the yard, there was a sign that read 'I love Earth' and several lawn gnomes were placed among the yard. Something told Haven that this was where Zim lived.
He walked into the yard and to the front door. He knocked and two robot trying to mimic human parents opened the door.
"Welcome home, son!" they greeted and Haven slipped into the house.
A robot sat on the couch watching a show. It looked over at Haven and smiled.
"Hi! Are you Mastah's friend?" the robot asked enthusiastically.
"Umm... Yeah...? Where is he?"
"He's in his lab!" he said happily.
"Where is his lab?"
The robot's eyes turned scarlet red.
"I can not tell an intruder the location of the lab."
"But I'm not an intruder; I'm Zim's friend."
The eyes turned back to cyan and the robot smiled.
"Well, that is true! I'll show you!"
The robot walked over to a toilet and spoke.
"Mastah's lab is down here!"
It was about to jump down the toilet when Haven stopped it.
"Wait. I'll go alone. I umm... Have a surprise for your master. I don't want him to know I'm here."
The robot nodded cheerfully and jumped out. Haven then, hesitantly, crawled into the toilet and flushed.
~
After getting flushed down, Haven found himself in an elevator going down. He then waited for it to go to Zim's lab. As he waited, he went over the plan he was working on over the past days.
First, he had to sneak into his base; which he already did. Then, he had to sneak up on the Irken. And finally, he'd have to plunge a knife into Zim's head.
The last part of the plan made Haven a bit nauseous. He wasn't really a violent person, so the thought of ending a life made him feel sick. He started to try to convince himself to try to do it.
"Come on, Haven. He'll gladly end your life and the lives of many others; he's IRKEN. He deserves it." the Carroian thought to himself as the elevator opened up to Zim's lab.
When the door opened, Haven quietly ran out of it and hid behind a large machine. He peered out of the side of it and saw Zim working on an invention.
"Perfect." Haven whispered and snuck closer to him.
Soon, the boy was right behind the oblivious Irken.
He silently took a deep breath and lifted the knife into the air. He was about to bring it down upon Zim's head when a thought appeared in his mind.
Haven imagined the Irken laying on the floor, cold and blood pouring out of his head.
Distracted by his sudden repulsive thought, the knife fell out of his hand and onto the floor causing Zim to quickly spin around.
The small Irken was shocked when he saw Haven, but didn't give the Carroian a moment's notice before a mechanical spider leg popped out of his PAK and lifted Haven in the air by his shirt collar.
~
"YOU! WHY ARE YOU HERE!?" Zim screamed at the boy in his lab.
Haven struggled to speak a bit, for the spider-leg choked him slightly.
"W-what does it look like I was doing...?"
Zim looked down and saw the knife. He was surprised and looked at Haven.
"Y-you... YOU TRIED TO KILL THE MIGHTY ZIM...!?"
The boy nodded before the spider leg dropped him, causing him to fall to the floor. Angrily, Zim picked up the knife and rushed over to where Haven was, almost ready to kill him.
Haven looked down at the floor before speaking.
"Go ahead. Kill me... I have nothing to live for anymore..."
Zim's anger faltered and was replaced by confusion.
Haven looked up at the small Irken.
"What are you waiting for? Kill me."
"Why is a FILTHY hyoo-man wishing death upon itself!?"
The boy let out a sigh.
"I'm a Carroian..."
"A CARROIAN!? BUT THEY WERE ENSLAVED DAYS AGO!"
Haven glared at Zim.
"I KNOW. And go ahead; KILL ME."
Zim shook his head.
"NO! I NEED TO KNOW HOW YOU ESCAPED THE MIGHTY IRKEN EMPIRE!"
~
Haven had given in to Zim's demands of telling how he escaped.
As he told his story, he felt worse. He felt more sorrow as he talked about his family and his beloved planet. He became more enraged as he told of how the Irkens conquered Carro. He felt like he fell into a deeper pit of despair as he told Zim about the depression he had felt the past few days.
After finishing his story, he expected a knife to plunge into his head by a smirking Irken, but what happened was really unexpected.
Two arms wrapped around him.
"Wha...!?" Haven exclaimed in shock by the Irken's affection.
But he actually didn't mind the embrace. He was comforted by it.
It was a moment before Zim pushed the Carroian away.
"DO NOT THINK THE MIGHTY ZIM IS MUSHY! I only hugged you because your sadness was disrupting my mightiness and I needed to stop it!" the Irken exclaimed as he stood up.
"Now, I MUST rid myself of your germs! LEAVE, Prince of Carro!"
Haven stood up and was about to leave when Zim grabbed his wrist and looked at him, still slightly confused at why he didn't attack the Carroian when he had the perfect chance.
"But before you leave, Carroian Prince. The Tallest told me your family is alive. But if you DO decide to die, I'm sure the Tallest would understand that your family would wish to greet you in death! And I personally like that outcome; Carroians are despicable creatures in my opinion, so I wouldn't mind several less of them in the Universe."
And with that, the Irken let go and walked off, shaking his head in disgust while wondering how the humans had managed to affect his ruthlessness.
Haven headed for the elevator and pressed the up button.
As the elevator went up, Haven looked down and let out a small chuckle.
"It seems I DO have something to live for."
Author's Note:
I am very sorry if this fanfiction sucks. I also apologize if my description of Haven's depression sucks. I'm a generally happy person, so I find it kinda hard to write sad stuff. Oh and it appears Zim is OOC... I apologize about that too. In fact, I'll just apologize about the entire fanfic. So... I'm sorry.
