Note: I haven't written this in a while (sorry) but to sum it up, in my other stories Out of the Closet and Finding Out, Simon has an affair with Morris and his father finds out. This is the third and final part. And if the subject of homosexuality makes you uncomfortable, please don't read this. Thanks.
It was a beautiful Sunday morning. The sky glowed blue outside and birds chirped cheerfully. But inside Simon's soul, it was dark and thunderous, his heart full of sorrow and anger. He was at church, sitting in the front pew with the rest of his family, his father preaching up at the pulpit.
Simon was happy to get out of the house. After his father found out that he was gay, the rest of the Camden family was quick to find out too. Each of their reactions had been different. Mary was confused, unsure of whether to take her brother's or father's side, and Lucy and Robbie were sympathetic towards Simon. Matt and Ruthie, of course, were self-righteous and treated Simon like some kind of untouchable leper. The twins were too young to understand, and besides, no one ever paid attention to them anyway.
But no matter how any of the young Camdens felt, they were afraid to speak to Simon or even look him in the eye, because they were afraid of Eric and Annie Camden. Because as angry as the Reverend had been, Simon's mother's reaction was even worse.
Simon had been sitting in his room, mulling over the situation. He was so lost in thought he hardly noticed when his mother stormed into his room. But when she started yelling, he became fully alert. Annie screeched. Simon looked up, surprised, from his reverie. Uh, hi, Mom
Don't try to use that nice tone with me! Simon, how could you do this? How could you betray the family this way?!
Mom, I didn't try to betray the familyit was just the way I feltI can't help it But Simon knew it was hopeless.
Simon, you know you can help it! Just like you can help yourself from premarital adult relations, drugs, and alcohol, you can stop yourself from being a homosexual! You know that, you've been taught that!
Simon had stopped trying to argue. He knew, just like with his father, he couldn't get through to his mother.
She continued, voice fiery with rage, I always knew you shouldn't have all these friends, that this Morris was bad news! Well, we've learned our lesson, haven't we? I know not to trust any of those kids, tempting my children, persuading my son to be gay! And this embarrasses the family, too, did you ever think of that? What do you suppose the rest of Glenoak will think when they learn the minister's son is gay? They'll think no morals. They won't want to come to our church anymore. Well, I'll let them know we disapprove! Simon, how could you do thisbetraying your family this way To Simon's horror, Annie broke down and started to cry. He had a sick feeling in his stomach, shame in his gut, seeing his mother cry like this just because he was gay. He looked down, ashamed. Eventually, after sobbing and sniffling, Annie left.
That was why Simon was glad to be out of the house. With his family's silence and mother's rage, it was nearly unbearable. But it was just as bad at church. Apparently everyone had found out about Simon, and he could feel their eyes on him, feel their judgment. Simon tried to ignore it by staring straight ahead, but it didn't quite work.
Up at the pulpit, Eric Camden said, Homosexuality has become accepted in our society. Gays are respected, getting jobs and being treated like they're just like everyone else and as if they're doing nothing wrong. Well, we know that they are. They're sinners. It says in the Bible that homosexuality is a sin. But some people choose to ignore that, and choose this shameful way of life. We must stop this acceptance of homosexuals, let them know that we believe their behavior is wrong and unacceptable.
Heads nodded in agreement, and Simon felt every eye of the congregation on him. He was furious. How could his father betray, embarrass him like this? But even though he was enraged, Simon wasn't surprised. This wasn't the first time Eric had used the church as a forum to voice his opinion on personal family problems.
School was even worse. Just like at church and home, everyone stared at Simon and nobody spoke to him. But as he walked down the hallway, he heard snickers and laughter that must have been directed at him, his own peers judging him, excluding him. He had had enough trouble making friends, this made it ten times worse. Even some of his teachers couldn't make eye contact with Simon, making him feel ashamed and guilty.
At lunchtime, Simon ran to Morris' locker. Hey, Morris. Morris looked up cautiously at Simon, as if afraid to be seen with him.
Hi, Simon. I take it your father found out?
Simon nodded. Yeah, my whole family. I'm not allowed to talk to you, or see you.
Morris frowned. I guess I don't have to ask how they reacted. Didn't you try to explain? Simon nodded and answered, But it didn't work. Morris sighed and said, This is really crappy. Everyone's been staring at me and whispering behind my back. My own friends won't talk to me.
I know, Simon said. But they'll understand, eventually, right?
Morris looked doubtful. I hope.
The days passed, until it was a week later. Nothing much had changed. Everyone was still shunning Simon and Morris. Simon was becoming depressed, losing hope that things would never be the same again, thinking that maybe he had made a mistake.
Just like every other night, Simon was laying on his bed, melancholy, lost in his own thoughts of misery. Suddenly, he heard a knock on the door. At first wary that it was one of his parents coming to yell at him, then realizing they had gone out to dinner, Simon opened the door. Hey, Lucy. I thought you weren't talking to me, Simon said, surprised, yet happy.
Hi, Simon, she said, almost shyly. I only ignored you because of Mom and Dad. Listen, the reason I'm here is because I want to tell youtell you that I'm not angry for what you did. At first I couldn't understand why you did what you did, but now I've realized that you can't help the way you feel.
Thanks, Lucy. Simon was so happy that someone else understood.
So, I just want you to know that I'll stand by you. And Robbie feels the same way.
What about Mary?
Well, you know Mary. She's kind of confused about all this. She's not as angry as Mom and Dad, though.
Simon sighed. Will they ever understand? How can I get them to?
Simon, I feel, eventually, they have to understand. And they will. You're their son. They still love you. They're just very angry. Maybe things won't ever be the same again, but I'm sure they'll come to their senses and speak to you again. Same with Matt and Ruthie and the rest of Glenoak.
Thanks, Lucy. I hope so. Lucy's words reassured Simon, resurrected the hope in him that he thought was lost. Maybe she was right. Maybe some day everyone would accept Simon, and Morris too, and treat them just the same way as they had before.
It was graduation day. All the seniors looked proud, nervous, and excited in their caps and gowns. Simon watched, pride surging through his body, as Morris ascended the stage and received his diploma.
Morris would be leaving soon. Simon would miss him, but was glad for Morris that he was moving on. They had said goodbye the night before, and decided to break off their relationship. Morris was going to school in New York, and long-distance relationships were just too difficult. Now Morris grinned down at Simon from the stage, and Simon smiled back.
Simon's parents were finally talking to him again. They were still angry, but they had all had a long talk and were trying to understand each other. The Camden parents still believed homosexuality was wrong, but accepted that this was just the way their son was and nothing would change that.
The rest of Glenoak had come to their senses too and had stopped treating Simon and Morris as pariahs. It might've helped that Reverend Camden had given a sermon preaching that we must try to accept homosexuals.
Simon was happy it had all ended so well. He hoped things would work out in the future, too, and his parents would become more accepting and open-minded. It seemed like a stretch, but Simon could dream, couldn't he?
