o.o; Hi ya. Ahem. So…this is my first Weiss fic, nothing too serious, just a little story for laughs. ^.^; Just to forewarn everyone, I have a terrible habit of starting stuff and loosing interest halfway through. Indeed, most of my ideas don't even make it to my computer before they get pushed aside. Also, I am really lazy. So, don't get you hopes up for me finishing this. But I'm gonna make it nice and short, so that hopefully even my attention span will last through the effort of writing it! Also, I can't really write. Sorry. I know I get kinda put out when bad writers pretend they can write. I know that sounds mean, but hey! I'm in the same boat! I would just like to ask anyone who suffers through this to give me a little constructive criticism so I can get better! Thanks!



Disclaimer: Juice is really tasty. OH! And I own a really nifty pair of bugnuks that I made, all by myself! Go Ken!

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Prologue

Poor Crawford…



"A field Trip?"

"To the zoo."

"No."

"But Crawford-"

"I said no."

Cool blue eyes bored into him as a delicate hand pulled the newspaper down and away from in front of his face. The two individuals stood in the middle of a large living room. Sunlight streamed in through the large picture windows of the spacious penthouse apartment, illuminating the seen of a well dressed, dark haired man resting comfortably in a plush, peach colored arm chair, and a fragile-looking teenager standing in front of him, engaged in a glaring contest.

"Crawford-san," Nagi began smoothly, "It's my guardian's turn to chaperone the class field trip. If you don't want to have to get into these situations you shouldn't have signed me up at school."

A scowl darkened the normally smooth and emotionless face of the American as he frowned back at the composed boy in front of him. "A good education is invaluable in life. Not to mention that it would raise suspicions if you were to remain unenrolled in school."

He knew this argument was a ploy by the slight boy before him to get Crawford to take him out of school. Nagi hated school, and though he never specified why, the tall, well-dressed man knew it was because he was anti-social, and felt left out in the presence of the other children. All the more reason to keep Nagi in school. If the boy expected to survive in this world, he had to know how to react in social situations without slamming someone into a wall.

"You could always say I was home schooled."

Folding his newspaper and setting in on his lap Crawford looked at the slim Japanese teenager with mild annoyance. That was quite possibly the worst idea Crawford had ever heard in his entire, bad-idea ridden life ("Hey Crawford! Let's put worms in Mr. Mitchell's shoes!" "Put those down."). And had been some baaaad ideas ("Hey Crawford! Let's smoke these fireworks!" "Oh God! Put those down!").

"No. If you were to remain in the house all day, unsupervised, you and Schuldig would kill each other, and, more importantly, drive me insane." I would be lucky if the house was still standing when I came home. It's bad enough with only Farfarello and Schuldig to torment each other. "Speaking of which, get him to escort you on your little class outing."

Crawford knew as soon as he uttered those words that he had no choice but to accompany Nagi on the trip. He could foresee it. Schuldig would encourage all his charges to jump into the lion pit. Farfarello wouldn't even make it all to the way to the school without butchering something. That kind of attention was not something Brad Crawford could afford to be focused on his team. He cursed mentally.

Nagi, as if sharing the vision that had just come to Crawford, merely raised an elegant eyebrow in a movement no doubt picked up from the very man he was using it on. "Chaperones are supposed to be responsible and keep the class safe, Crawford."

Damn that kid. He was determined to make Crawford suffer.

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It was stuffy in the classroom. Through the windows, Crawford could see the black top of the parking lot outside, and the shimmering waves of heat that were beginning to rise from it. It was only 8 o'clock and already the day was promising to be extremely hot. It was only a few weeks from summer break and it certainly seemed like summer already. Crawford was beginning to regret wearing his suit.

He had already ditched his sport coat in the car, on Nagi's pleading request, in an attempt to seem slightly more casual. Indeed, all the other 3 parents standing at the front of the room with him were wearing tacky, brightly colored T-shirts and shorts.

One woman's outfit (a loud Hawaiian T-shirt featuring multi-colored bunnies on rainbow surfboards with a pink and yellow background, combined with a pair of blue and red plaid shorts) was enough to give Crawford a large headache and a case of vertigo. Yet he, the man in a blue dress shirt and beige business pants, was the one getting all the weird looks. Stupid humans.

"I'd like to thank all the parents and Guardians for helping out, by coming along and chaperoning the field trip! I just know that everyone will have a great time!" The pretty, young teacher, Ms. Inomata-sensei, was gushing. About as much chance of that happening as a giant pineapple crashing down out of the sky, thought Crawford, as the teacher began to take attendance. What sort of cruel joke was this, anyway? That he, Bradley Crawford, Oracle of Schwarz and professional cold hearted bastard, was supposed to look after a group of school kids on their trip to the zoo?! The world, indeed, was out to get him.

Stealing a glance at Nagi, sitting in a desk near the middle of the room, he could tell the boy was thinking along similar lines. A passive expression was on his face, as usual, but Crawford could pick up the slight difference in the mask that marked it as one of resignation and long suffering. Crawford almost felt sorry for him.

Almost.

After all, it was Nagi's fault Crawford was here suffering too.

"Right! Now that we have attendance," Continued Ms. Inomata, looking up from her clipboard and smiling brightly at the children seated before her, "I would like to introduce you to your Chaperones for today! Mr. Yamamoto," she waved to a tall thin man with a beard and wearing a tan safari shirt and green shorts, "Mrs. Takahashi," the Hawaiian shirt lady, who was rather plump, "Mrs. Tsuchiya," a relatively young, athletic looking mother, "And Mr. Crawford, Nagi's guardian." The teacher finished waving in the Shwarz leader's direction.

The whole class nodded at this, as if it explained something. Crawford chose to ignore this reaction and turned his attention instead to wild roaring of a motorcycle outside, as it swerved into the parking lot, and the sound of screeching brakes that quickly followed. A figure leapt off the bike and made a sprint towards the building. A vision shimmered to life inside Crawford's mind. Pounding footsteps echoed down the ha, the classroom door was thrown wide open, and-

"AH! OH NO!"

Crawford jerked his head around to focus on the teacher again, his hand sliding toward the gun holster he wasn't wearing, fingers grasping futilely at empty air.

"Where's our fifth chaperone?!" Ms. Inomata's pretty brown eyes were large and distressed, peering around the room as if the missing person would magically appear out of someone's backpack.

Crawford, with great effort, forced his hand away from where his holster would have been. He had foreseen he would end up shooting the young teacher if he had brought it. That would have been bad ("Hey Crawford! Let's eat these tape worms!" "Oh. My. God! Put those DOWN!). But if the woman was going to wail about every mishap on this hellish trip then maybe he would have been better off bringing his gun along anyway.

"Please Inomata-san!" said a brown haired boy near the back row, raising his hand, "Ken-nii-chan said that he might be a little late in arriving. He had to attend to work early this morning, but he should be hear very soon!"

As if on cue, pounding footsteps echoed down the hall, the classroom door was thrown wide open, and in strode none other than the brown haired, claw wielding assassin of Weiß.

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To be continued…god, and rodent sized attention span willing.



Yes! Little bit of a cliff hanger, I know. Ya know, originally I was planning on making this a one-shot. But I felt it should be in multiple parts for some reason. Don't ask. I just did. Deal with it. ^.^ Thanks for making it all the way down here and reading it! The next will be an actual chapter. So, come back soon! Ja Bye Bye!