Disclaimer: I don't own the main character. The main character is not any specific newsie. It can be whoever you would like it to be.

A/N: This is for Newsies Challenge: Week 9

Enjoy!

Sometimes, I'm not so sure about love. It's true. Everyone should love something whether it's a person or a pet or a hobby. But me I just have myself, just me, the orphan, the orphan of life.

You see, my parents died about eight years ago, when I was nine years old. Our whole house had burned down while I was out playing with some of my friends. Everything was gone.

And now, for the past eight years I became a newsboy in order to make money. Plus I have a roof over my head and I'm always surrounded by people to talk to, who are in similar situations to mine.

The newsies are my friends now, my family, my everything. I love them, but after what happened to my family I don't think I will ever love the same way I did. I loved my parents but they're gone now and no one can replace my love for them.

What's love supposed to mean anyway? Something you care about so much that you just can't help it? Once you truly love something can you ever stop loving it completely?

I guess in the pit of my stomach I know that it is possible to love again. But I'm just too lazy to put any effort into it.

I thought about all of this, lying on my bed in the lodging house. I had finished selling pretty early and I had been the only one to return for a good half hour. But now I can hear pairs of footsteps coming up the stairs.

It was not the time to be interrupted. I wanted to think some more. I needed to sort more of my thoughts out in my head, by myself. So I climbed down the fire escape before anyone could see me and started to walk.

Walking wasn't the plan for thinking. I've tried it and it's pointless. Endless amounts of times I've walked into to something or someone because I'm deep in thought. Plus I'm so exhausted from selling papes I don't exactly feel like walking in my spare time.

But unfortunately, I do have to walk to where I am going, otherwise I obviously wouldn't be walking. It's really not that far anyway, only about five blocks or so. I finally reached the particular street and turned down an empty alleyway.

There were boxes stacked in one of the corners of the alley and I slid them over about two feet to reveal a door. It doesn't have a knob on it so I just pushed it open, like always.

Don't ask me how I found this place, I just kind of came across it.

I walked inside to find the abandoned room exactly how I had left it. I was standing in an apartment building, the back half of the first floor must have been made to be used for storage purposes. At least that is what I think.

I don't think the landlords here really know about it, otherwise it would have stuff in it, or at least made into another apartment.

Somebody knew about it though, because it had electricity and one single run-down bed with a very old mattress that had springs sticking out of the sides of it.

As I laid there, on the old bed, staring up at the dusty ceiling, I resumed to my original thought. Well, one thing for sure, I loved to sell papers and I loved that it gave me money so I could buy food. I love how I have people to talk to and get advice from.

Maybe I could ask them about what they think on this topic. Nah, they'd think I was crazy for thinking too much. I decided that I would go back to the lodging house, being surrounded by people isn't that terrible.

Lonely isn't the best thing either, it's good to be alone sometimes, but it can get very boring very easily. It's nice to have both opportunities available to me. I'm lucky to have things to care about.

I sat up and took a deep breath, no reason exactly I just needed a breath. I stood up and headed for the exit. And then the doorbell rang.

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