Hello. This is a poem that I wrote for English class as part of my poetry final. Okay, maybe this doesn't really belong here, but I don't see the harm. Besides, maybe you can give me some advice on how to make it better. Please review. Enjoy!
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The Lion by Jagabor
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The lion stood proudly
over his kill,
An elderly zebra,
That he'd caught on a hill.
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He should not have gone out,
He knew as he ate.
He should have staid in,
But he just could not wait.
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For sleeping and eating,
was this young lion's perk.
Stalking and hunting,
was lioness work.
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This fact was well-know,
but when the females take hours,
a lion must rely
on his true hunting-powers.
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That is why he ventured,
to this vast, endless, plain
and now he stood proudly,
over the zebra he'd slain.
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A spotted hyena,
and her hungering crew
approached the young lion
to see what he'd slew.
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Drool dripped from their jaws
like leaks in a cave
to show the young lion
that his meal they did crave.
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The lion crouched low
And prepared to attack
As he turned his attention
To the hyena-pack
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With a magnificent roar,
the lion declared
to the hyenas around him
"This meal won't be shared!"
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But hyenas are soldiers,
As is their renown.
Their calls, cries, and cackles,
showed they wouldn't back down.
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The lion roared once more.
He roared very proudly.
He roared to show strength.
He roared very loudly.
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But it was all in vain.
The hyenas, so crude,
quickly lunged forward
and swiped the lion's food.
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The hyenas ran off
with their stolen feast
and looked back at the lion,
the so-called "king of beasts."
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The lion stared wide-eyed
at the deviant thieves,
and rampaged strait at them,
past bushes and sheaves.
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The lead-hyena then cackled
and with a large grin,
took down the great lion,
with the help of her kin.
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The lion reeled backward,
with a painful roar,
and fell with a thud,
on the savannah floor.
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The hyenas back off
After unleashing their wrath.
They looked at the lion
And began to laugh.
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The lion's eyes widened.
"How can this be?
Theses accursed hyenas
Are laughing at me!"
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They were indeed laughing
at the lion, so conceited,
who lay on the ground
worn out and defeated.
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The young lion lied still
as if bound by a shackle.
For it seemed the whole world
Joined the hyena's cackle.
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The trees laughed at the lion,
as did the grass.
Their laughs turned the lion,
into a shivering mass.
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The young lion let out
a frustrated cry.
the dirt laughed at him
with the clouds in the sky.
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As his pride became shattered
The young lion wailed
"The world laughs at me!
For I've miserably failed!"
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"Have you nothing better to do?
Oh, clouds in the sky?
The fight was not fair!
So why laugh at me? Why?"
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The sounds of six roars, which
echoed brutality
brought the young lion
back to reality.
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Six lionesses from his pride
had come to his aid
and bared their sharp fangs
at the hyena brigade.
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The hyenas stared wide-eyed
ending their laugh.
For they were now being challenged.
This was no time to chaff.
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The hyena leader
then quickly dispatched
her group in all directions,
for they were clearly out-matched.
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As the hyenas scrambled
with nerves made of glass,
they grabbed the dead zebra
and ran through the grass.
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The hyenas were gone,
The lionesses knew.
for those hyenas, fearless cowards,
bit off more than they could chew.
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The young lion quickly
got to his feet.
His zebra was gone.
Now what would he eat?
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The sly, spry hyenas,
beat him to the punch.
Fortunately, the lionesses
brought the lion's lunch.
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They dropped two zebras before him,
which they'd found on the plain.
A gift for the lion,
for he had the mane.
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Upon seeing this
the lion was thrilled.
(Although, he could have had it sooner,
had he not been strong-willed.)
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The lion ate before the lionesses,
a noticeable quirk
that he'd gained all the spoils,
but did none of the work.
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The lionesses cared not,
and they never did.
For them, eating first,
The laws of nature forbid.
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The lion stood proudly
after eating his meal.
With his pride behind him,
He now had nerves of steel.
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The bright sun shined on the lion
who let out a proud roar.
He had lost the battle,
but had not lost the war.
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The lion thought of the hyenas,
who had stolen his chow,
before addressing the world.
"Who's laughing now?"
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What do you all think? Your input will be greatly appreciated. Please review.
