Once upon a time in a far away kingdom near the bay of Frisco.
There among the scattered homes was a huge black stone castle.
The Kingdom of Gameth Radar seemed like a happy place to live in.
So it seemed for the rulers of the Kingdom were basically snitches.
The king of the land, Lord Hollander of Coop was very odd and demanding.
The castle guards were always on the move and guard to keep birds away.
Lord Coop didn't like birds so he made a law to keep all birds out of the kingdom.
Sure chicken, squab and pheasant were served as food, but wild birds are gone.
His gold crown with different colored gems shined in the sun as he walked around.
The castle was quiet as the maids and butlers scurried around to keep busy.
His walk lead him to the castle gardens, the moat helped the beautiful flowers bloom.
Rare, coloful flowers bloomed as the sun nourished them and the grass they came from.
His hazel eyes came upon his queen who was currently reading a black grimiore.
To those outside the castle, his queen was name Lady Ashley Coop when outside.
Inside the castle she was actually a male by the name of Lord Henry Gilbert the Third.
Henry was a warlock with the ability to shape-shift his form to whatever form he wanted.
The previous guards and workers were removed in fear of them revealing the shocking truth.
Well one person was spared, the Black Knight who was currently showing off to the ladies.
He was rich, sexy, very limber and energetic and known to some as Sir Lorenzo Valoria.
No one ever saw him without his armor, made of the strongest black and red metal.
His sword was a thick blade made of black metal with a gold handle and engravings on it.
So far it was a beautiful day until the Black Knight was screaming in rage as eggs hit him hard.
The King and Queen were brought out of their thoughts as a huge ball appeared in the sky.
It hit them before they could blink as they were covered in a dark green and black goo.
Lord Coop wiped his face to find the ball was a mixture of garbage, tar and cream.
Soon more balls came, hitting the castle walls and splattering its vile contents everywhere.
The queen ran off to the royal chambers to wash the vile goo off before the smell lingered.
The Black Knight and the King were trying to locate the source of the balls from the tower.
Far from the castle was a catapult currently being loaded by three silly men or heroes.
The first man was tall with a large nose, currently the town crier since he was the loudest.
He had a ridiculous laugh as he carefully locked the catapult as it was being aimed.
This was Tomas Magrino, amet haedum or the boring kid in his native language.
The second man was a short man with dark eyes, short black hair and a dark tan.
He had a lecherous grin on his smooth face as he calculated the next spot to fire.
This was Lucas Sullivanus the gravis or the guru since his predictions were never wrong.
He was the strategist of the group and the brains of the operation most of the time.
The final man of this group was such a genius as he mixed the next batch of bombs.
His brownish gold hair glimmered as his pale skin made it look like a halo.
The bright eyes were focused on the foul concoction as he carefully filled the containers.
Here we have Ryan Taljanic, bibisset or the drunk of the group for very obvious reasons.
Aside from mixing chemicals, he was the best beer brewer in the town and he was loved.
He can make you any beer of any flavor, whether sweet or bitter he was a genius.
This also led him to drink whatever he made and thus made him the town drunk.
Even though he was drunk as a skunk, he was still functionally in his daily life.
Right now he placed the now filled containers out of the sun to prevent explosions.
" Are you sure they don't know where we are? A small army could be nearby to get us."
Lucas sighed as he helped Tom load the catapult with the next batch of bombs.
" We would be dead if thy actually found us now shush before Tom draws more attention."
As Tom was about to cut the rope, a wave of swords came about 3 inches from their necks.
It seems the King had found them and the Black Knight came before them with red eyes.
His glossy armor was sticky with eggs as our silly heroes were finally caught in the act.
Every-time they attack the castle or tried to get in, they always managed to get away.
" I finally caught you little rats, your heads will roll for the crimes you've committed against the Royal crown. Any last words before we take you to the guillotine?"
" Yeah this shit is about to get crazy, run away!"
The Black Knight turned as a large round shadow covered them and he turned to see.
It was large flaming ball coming their way from the castle catapult and falling fast.
Soon a large explosion sent the army and the Black Knight flying into different directions.
Nothing was left of the catapult except some piles and chunks of wood burnt.
Our three heroes landed in a tree as the smell of the bombs covered the area like a wave.
Tomas was dusting himself off as he tried not to pass out from the horrid stench.
Lucas was trying to grab Ryan just to choke him for his bombs ruining their catapult.
" You willow smith looking mother freaker, why do you keep increasing the potency of these bombs?!"
" Hey it's not my fault they fought back, besides we got away without losing our heads and we're still in one piece."
Tomas helped them both down as they found some bags of gold left from the army.
With the gold in hand, they landed near the town bar to drown their worries away.
