This was an attempt to console myself after the final episode. While it didn't work, I do like how this turned out and I hope you do as well.
Rated K and the standard disclaimer applies.
In the weeks since a trio of speedsters saved the world, the lives of many members of the Justice League were gradually returning to normal. There was a lot to do and follow up on, whether it was making sure the Reach would be punished for their actions or tracking down leads on Vandal Savage. Most didn't even have time to catch their breaths, let alone think about Wally or how much he was missed.
Unless you were one of the people to whom Wally was closest.
Barry kept up his duties as Flash, of course, continuing to be the charming, self-depricating hero he always had been. And while he was out on a mission, you would never guess he'd just lost his nephew, his protege, someone who was more or less a son to him. Off-duty, however, was a different story. He kept to himself when he was in the Watchtower. Only once did someone mention the guilt Barry was carrying over his decision not to slow down sooner to account for Wally's different level of endurance. Ollie ended up flat on his back for his concern, an incensed Barry looming over him with his eyes narrowed. After that, no one so much as asked him how his day was going.
Bart was doing everything he could to live up to the Kid Flash moniker, being cautious not to take anything too lightly or try to be too much like Wally. He didn't think he was anywhere even close to being as crash as Wally, and when anyone compared the two he was quick to correct them, politely reminding them of the many times Wally had gone above and beyond and saved the day. Bart had his bad days, as did everyone, and for the most part he was feeling better each day.
Dick had taken his break, disappearing for several weeks and severing all contact with everyone, even Batman. No one knew where he went and no one had the courage to ask. He seemed to be alright when he returned, but he also looked like he hadn't slept the entire time he'd been gone and didn't say much to anyone. He would give a polite smile if he made eye contact with anyone but would offer nothing more. He, much like Barry, looked like any mention of Wally would crack the facade so everyone left him alone.
Artemis was the one everyone worried about and fussed over, to the point she interrupted Batman's debriefing after her last mission and told everyone in the room to quit treating her like she was breakable. She wasn't the only one hurting and Wally would have had an absolute conniption over everyone being so sad and somber, so knock it off. Her outburst amused Batman to the point he simply stared at her, a slight smirk appearing on his face as he waited for her rant to end. When she was finished, he arched an eyebrow, as if asking if she was done. Looking directly at him, all she did was nod and Batman continued his discussion, noting with admiration at her lack of apology.
That incident seemed to diffuse the remaining tension in the room, and from then on the subject of Wally and his death wasn't quite so taboo. While people didn't openly talk about him in front of Barry, Bart, Dick or Artemis, behind closed doors more and more people were admitting how much they missed him and how they wished he were still around. Healing had finally taken hold and it felt like someone had opened a window and let in some much-needed fresh air.
Beta Team returned from a surveillance operation late one evening and Artemis decided to stay in her room in the Watchtower instead of heading back down to Gotham to stay with her mother. Since she'd lost Wally, she hadn't been back to their apartment in Palo Alto to move anything out, and a friend had taken their dog Nelson to watch until Artemis was ready to come and get him. She wasn't sure if she would ever be able to go get Nelson, but she tried to keep an open mind and made sure the canine was well-cared for.
After a long, hot shower she made her way to the kitchen, braiding her wet hair over her shoulder as she went. Despite the fact that conducting surveillance wasn't exactly a strenuous activity, she was famished, realizing she hadn't eaten at all that day. Looking down as she secured the end of her braid with an elastic band, she nearly ran into Dick as she entered the kitchen.
"Oh! Sorry!" She steadied herself, grabbing his arm and reaching out to catch the sandwich that slid off his plate. She caught it before it hit the floor and gingerly put it back his plate.
"It's okay, no harm done." He gave her the same polite smile he gave everyone else lately and moved to step around her. "Have a good night."
She watched him walk back down the hallway for a moment as the overwhelming sense of loneliness threatened to swallow her again. Nights without Wally were the worst, and the last thing she wanted to do was spend another one muffling her sobs with her pillow, curled up so tightly that it was difficult to get up in the morning on account of the body aches.
"Uh, Dick?"
He stopped, but didn't turn around. "Yeah?"
She fidgeted slightly, taking her braid between her fingers and smoothing the ends down. "Care to join me? No sense in both of us eating alone- the kitchen's big enough for both of us," she said, willing him to turn around.
He turned to face her, the dark shadows beneath his eyes painfully obvious in the dim light of the hallway. His distant and overly-polite demeanor began to crumble and he smiled. "I'd love to."
Artemis waited for him to catch up, turning and falling into step with him once he did, studying the contents of his plate. "What's for dinner?"
Dick looked down and chuckled. "Peanut butter and jelly on wheat and a strange potato concoction M'Gann made earlier." He held the plate closer to his nose and sniffed. "Smells good, actually." He held the plate out to her as they walked and Artemis accepted the invitation and snatched a piece of potato with the tips of her fingers, tasting it.
"Potato salad. A little heavy on the mustard, but it's good." She licked her fingers and started gathering ingredients as Dick took a seat across from her at the counter. "Where did you find the peanut butter?"
Dick pointed to a large pantry to her right. "Left side, second shelf, behind the Oreos."
Artemis disappeared into the pantry, a muffled 'thanks' coming from inside as she gathered an armful of items before reappearing and dumping them on the counter. She grabbed a few things from the fridge and started assembling a sandwich.
"You and Beta Team find much tonight?" Dick asked, poking at his potato salad with the tines of his fork. He was suddenly disinterested in his food.
Artemis shrugged. "Not a lot, no. At least nothing that will break the case wide open." She spread a thin layer of honey on a slice of bread before adding a layer of peanut butter. "About three hours in, we started playing 'I Spy' to pass the time." She gave him a wry smile, adding grape jam to a second piece of bread. "Did you go out anywhere tonight?"
He shook his head. "No, I was off tonight, so I was working with Kaldur on finalizing some strategic plans for our next attempt to track down Vandal Savage." He pushed his plate away and leaned forward on his elbows, watching her make her sandwich.
She didn't say anything, adding a layer of potato chips to the peanut butter-side of the sandwich. Putting the pieces together, she added several Oreos to her plate before she spoke. "I don't even like this," she whispered, pushing the plate away. "I didn't realize I was making it." She crossed her arms over her chest and bit her bottom lip. "I used to make it for him when he woke up hungry in the middle of the night."
"And it wasn't right unless you used rippled potato chips, crunchy peanut butter and added a sliced banana," Dick said quietly. He looked up at Artemis and saw her astonished look once their eyes met, the heartbreak she'd done so well at hiding clearly visible. "He showed me how to make it once, and whenever he was sick or hurt, he'd con me into making it for him." He smiled sadly.
Artemis sat on a stool across from Dick, tears spilling from her eyes and onto her cheeks before dropping to the counter top. "Or when he'd made you angry and he was trying to apologize." He nodded.
"I remember once, I couldn't have been more than twelve or thirteen, and he'd embarrassed me in front of a girl I had a crush on. I didn't talk to him for days." Dick reached for his plate again, pulling it in front of him. "The next time I saw him, he had a paper bag for me. He handed it over, mumbled an apology and disappeared. I opened the bag and inside was a sandwich, much like that one." He pointed to the sandwich Artemis made and carefully taking one half of it, he traded half of his for half of hers.
"That sounds like him," she said quietly, a ghost of a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. She took a bite of the strange sandwich, the potato chips crunching loudly as she chewed. After another bite she tilted her head and stared at the half-eaten sandwich. "You know, it's actually not that bad."
"That was my exact reaction when he first made me try it."
They ate in silence for a few minutes, taking comfort in the shared memory of Wally.
"Did he ever make you eat his 'world famous supreme pizza'? The one he made with about half the contents of the fridge?"
Dick made a face, laughing and cringing at the same time. "Thankfully, no. But he told me about the time he got you to eat it."
"It was the worst thing I've ever eaten!"
"And the best thing I've ever turned down," Dick replied, grinning. He took her plate and his own, heading over to the sink.
Artemis started gathering her ingredients, closing lids and folding bags, putting the food away. Her smile started disappearing as the mess on the counter did. "I miss him," she said softly, unable to put the peanut butter back in the pantry.
"Me too," Dick added quietly, standing next to her at the counter. A few moments passed, the both of them staring at the jar of peanut butter in silence.
"The nights are the worst. When I first came on as Tigress, it meant not going home to him every night, seeing his face when I walked in the door." Artemis toyed with the jar, sliding it back and forth on the counter between her hands. "And eventually, I got used to it. It was hard, but I knew that it wasn't forever and that soon I'd be able to go home to him instead of an empty bunk on a sub in the middle of the Atlantic."
Dick turned to face her, leaning a hip against the counter and said nothing, allowing her to talk. He gently put his hand on her back, rubbing circles between her shoulder blades. She was trembling.
"So when our cover was blown after the Reach and the Light met up, we were so excited because it meant I didn't have to pretend anymore. I would be safe, and we could go back to how things used to be. And now…" she stopped, her breath hitching in her throat.
"It starts all over again," Dick finished quietly.
Artemis looked up at him and nodded before burying her face against his chest. "And it's not fair. I'd just gotten him back, and we had plans. We were going to…" She began to cry as Dick wrapped his arms around her. "I can't do this again.. I can't…"
He leaned his cheek against the top of her head as he held her, not knowing what to say. Truthfully, he was just as distraught as she was- he barely functioned, running on auto-pilot ever since that day, and seeing Artemis break was more than he could handle. A few tears fell, slipping down his cheek and into her damp hair. The tightness in his chest and the lump in his throat didn't allow him to speak, and he wouldn't have known what to tell her even if he'd been able to talk. He did the only thing he could think of, and the only thing that he knew would help. He held her.
They stood with their arms around each other for some time, neither saying a word and each taking comfort in the other's embrace. After she nearly fell asleep in his arms still standing up, he carried her to her room, tucked her into bed and kissed her forehead. As he turned to leave, a hand darted from the blankets and latched tightly onto his wrist. Startled, he looked down at her, her grey eyes glittering in the dim light.
"Thank you."
He smiled warmly, covered her hand with his and squeezed. "You're welcome, Artemis. I'm here whenever you need me."
She nodded once more and drew her hand back beneath the covers after wiping her eyes. "And you know where to find me when you need me," she whispered. "Okay?"
He nodded. "I know. I've always known." With a grateful smile, he turned and left, closing her door behind him. They would never be completely alright without Wally, but eventually they would be okay.
And okay was alright with them.
And when the night falls in around me
I don't think I'll make it through
I'll use your light to guide the way
Cause all I think about is you
