Title : Can't Say Good-bye (Part 6)

Feeling nervous chill running down her spine, Kaori hugged herself and closed her eyes as she awaited her underground elevator to stop at the entrance of Section One base located in subterranean. Another missions, another kills. She sighed deeply. She can do it. She can do it. She can do it. The phrase repeated itself in her mind like some secret mantra to protect her. Somehow, always it was more difficult for her to pull herself together before the mission than after. As much as her mental control was tight during mission, with equally amount of force , her control would snap after. Simply, she couldn't hide behind her mask of normalcy completely. Pain, shame, fear, and guilt. She let loose them in herself like hungry wild beasts rushing out from cages for preys. Sometimes, she could submerge herself into drinks, but she couldn't do it as often as she wanted since she must be 24/7 standby for any upcoming mission.

From obscure cold-operative grapevine, she had heard that new operatives are usually put into one-year-long extremely unpredictable and rush mission schedule to archive mental and physical endurance capacity built only by experiences in the real world. Informally, it was called the internship among operatives. Anybody who couldn't survive this one-year hell, simply he or she didn't have stuff to be part of Section One. The failure's demise remained unclear, but anyone could easily guess it. None could get another chance after Section One. It had been seven-long-mind-numbing months for Kaori since she passed her two-year fundamental training with Nikita. She had completed almost the half of her internship, five more months to go, but then what? What is she running to? To become a better killer? To be able to kill without remorse or guilt? Suddenly, she felt more like a little child who lost her mother in the busy crowded market and frantically looking her among passing people. Lost and desperate. Still couldn't believe what was happening to her was real.

"Hello, Birkoff." As Kaori entered the mission briefing room decorated in simple monotone, she greeted young Section One computer whiz, Birkoff, who was at the table, looking down his communication pad.

"Hi, Kaori. The briefing will be start as soon as everyone gets here. So, how's weather outside?" Pushing the bridge of his round eyeglasses up, Birkoff rose his eyes from his mission profile pad and asked her.

"Miserable. Nothing but cold and wet." Kaori sat on chair opposite to Birkoff. Her black leather waist coat, gray wool skirts, and knee-high black boots melted into the room's decoration.

As soon as Kaori took her position, several other operatives, Nikita, and Operation entered the room. Nikita nodded toward Kaori, sending her silent acknowledgment to the formal trainee. Kaori knew that Nikita wasn't officially responsible for her training any longer; however, they shared invisible bond similar to sisterhood. She knew that Nikita personally cares about her not only as cold-operative of Section One but also as a person, a human being with emotion, ethic, and moral.

For Kaori, her former trainer was the role model, the shining evidence, which a person can survive under unspeakable circumstance and still can keep his or her moral integrity intact. But unlike her, Nikita had Michael. As Kaori was given to Nikita, once Nikita was the Michael's material. From what little Kaori have heard, their bond went beyond between trainer and trainee. In operatives' locker room, their legendary love story was exaggerated overly and gossiped extensively. Both parties being extremely beautiful and deadly cold-operatives, their sexual escapee was always a major topic, but Kaori felt it was not all about sex. She thought their complete trust to each other made them the strongest and most unique pair in Section One. Their trust, like the one she once had with Ryo. Her heart pained with its loss.

Working side by side with ex-con, sociopath, rapists, child molesters, mass murders, and others committed unspeakable crimes, being sent into a mission in god-knows-where without any promise of safe return, and having a superior who barters your body without any hesitation for means to the organization's end. Trust, the complete, unconditional faith to each other without any doubts or questions, was like water in desert. Scarce to find. Without it, it drove you slowly but surely into insanity. Even though you could see it, it might be a cruel mirage across the dune. From trust, hope grows, and with hope people can live, not just existing like an inanimate object. That's what these two, Nikita and Michael, were having, so Kaori believed.

Operation dressed in simple suits stood at the head of glass table in center for few seconds to gain everyone's attention on him, his hands resting on his back. "Two weeks ago, a military research lab in Virginia was broken in. From the facility, the top-secret biological and chemical weapon information was stolen. Despite the military agencies' efforts, the perpetuators and their purpose remained to be unknown." Kaori listened Operation's rigid and flat voice while staring down her folded hands on the glass table.

"From our various sources, we came to the a best possible conclusion that an Russian organize crime group, called North Star, is responsible for this act. After the fall of Soviet Union, North Star rapidly rose to the top in Russian underworld, mainly smuggling ex-Soviet armories to various war-torn third countries, also involving in illegal human and drug trafficking to Middle East and North America. Despite its short history and being a newcomer, North Star gained quickly a reputation for being a major trader in biological and chemical warfare in black market. Indirectly, the group is responsible for several hundred thousands of deaths around globe." Several pictures of decaying lifeless bodies of unknown victims piled each other in ditch, mass graves, and fields, were flashed on the information screen on the center of glass table. Kaori remained silent and looked calm and bore, but her hands were in tight fist and telling a different story.

"Even after two long weeks, there are no words of stolen intel coming into black market. We suspected it is still in their possession. Our mission is to retrieve the stolen information, and gather intel in North Star's entire operations for its disbandment." Operation nodded toward Nikita to take over the briefing.

As Nikita touched the pads on the table, a handsome middle-age man with long black hair in neat pony tale appeared on the flat screen. His face was angular, and his ocean blue eyes were slanted like a cat, giving a sharp and slick impression.

"This is a leader of North Star, Vladimir Galieva, age thirty-seven. On surface, he is known as a wealthy Russian businessman, dealing international trades with various countries. Also, North Star has an interesting strong tie to China, and there are few Chinese high ranking members in his organization." Several pictures of Asian men appeared on the screen.

"From our source, we know that Galieva is looking for US partner to expand his North American market. We will pose as his prospect American ally. Our first priority is to gain his trust to enter his organization. All other information including individual covers are on the pad. Dismiss."

Picking up their own pad from the table, each operative quietly drifted away from the briefing room. "Kaori?" As Kaori was almost leaving the nearly empty room with her pad, Nikita called her.

"Yes?" Nikita approached Kaori who looked back to her.

Putting her hand on Kaori's shoulder gently, Nikita looked into Kaori's eyes. "I want to see you in my office."

A shadow of worry flashed briefly on Kaori's face "It's about this mission. Your cover will be a little complex. I want to explain it to you personally." Seeing the formal trainee's agitation, Nikita quickly added her words.

"Do you want to see me now?" Clutching the pad in her hand, Kaori hesitantly asked.

"Yes. Now." Gently, still touching Kaori's shoulder, Nikita guided young woman away from briefing room to her office. Kaori couldn't see her formal trainer's somber face behind her.