Author's Notes: Here is a fic about things that TMM characters would never say. It's random and pointless, but I thought it might be funny. Obviously OOC. This is supposed to be crack humor. If you hate this kind of thing, please, run for your life! And if you like this kind of thing, please read.

Review, please, and tell me your opinions.

Disclaimer: I don't own TMM at all. I also don't own any of the song lyrics.

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-Things That TMM Characters Would Never Say-

By: Konnichiwa Minna

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Ichigo: Ouch. My thong has gone too far up my ass.

Ryou: I have a huge secret. Shh! Don't tell anyone! My fart's smell like strawberries... and they make me think of Ichigo!

Kishu: I don't really like Ichigo much anymore. I'm much more interested in Ryou.

Mint: You know what? I admit it. I am a lousy, good-for-nothing loser, who can only drink tea. I'm no where near as talented as Ichigo!

Lettuce: I'm too sexy for my shirt! Too sexy for my shirt! So sexy, it hurts!

Pudding: I'm feeling rather horny. I think I will cheat on Taruto, just this once!

Zakuro: Like, OMG, I think that you are so fugly! You make my grandma look smokin' hot!

Taruto: I'm going to the strip club. Meet you there, sexy mama. Don't worry, you'll always be my baby.

Pai: Wooo! Wet t-shirt party!! Hell yeah! This is awesome! Give it to me baby, uh huh, uh huh!

Masaya: I'm a big fat bitch. I'm going to kill myself when I grow up! -smiles innocently-

Miwa: Moe, I think you're attractive. Would you... make out with me?

Moe: Damn, I need a larger role in this series. If making out makes me popular, then I would do it! Meet in my room at midnight! -winks-

Deep Blue: I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world! Life in plastic, it's fantastic! -high squeaky voice-

Keiichiro: Eww, old hags are taking over the world. By the way, Ryou, I am way smarter than you! I'm a freakin' rocket scientist, yeah.

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Author's Notes: Trust me. I know that was terrible. And stupid. And pointless. But, I was seriously bored. And, I wasn't trying. So, I know it sucks, but who cares. Not me!

Review!

Flames accepted. Ahaha.

Konnichiwa Minna

-X- If there are any Gakuen Alice fans or Naruto fans, please check out my other fics & review! Thanks for reading this fic & hopefully you'll review before you go off to read another fic or do whatever you're planning to do after you read this. -X-