M.A.S.K

THE WELL OF THORNS

WRITTEN BY ZARIUS

Disclaimer: M.A.S.K and all characters are trademarked by Kenner toys and Cookie Jar Entertainment


Dusty Hayes gazed out at the tainted splendour of the lake from the inside of the trailer, watching the crisis unfold before him as Gloria began to drunkenly slur her way through a hymn she had heard as a child.

Brad had tried intervening earlier, trying to talk some slight sense into Gloria, but he had only helped accelerate the process by opting to share a few cans with her. He had thought it was his best shot at making two friends comfortably mellow, instead it proved to be an ill comfort.

The phone went off, Dusty picked it up. The assuring voice of Matt Trakker could be heard on the other end.

"Matt? Hey, good to hear from you buddy, how's well...how IS Buddy?" Dusty said, making reference to Buddy 'Clutch' Hawkes, who had been involved in an altercation on the highway nearby and had been rushed to hospital.

"The Doctors have assessed Clutch's condition..he woke up an hour ago, has a few stitches in his forehead, a little rough up on the shoulder, but he'll be fit for visits tomorrow" Matt replied

"That's good to hear Matt, I'll go tell Gloria the good news"

"How is she Dusty? And give me just one word" Matt asked

Dusty looked out the window of the trailer and frowned as Gloria

"Fragile" Dusty said

"I figured as much. Just so you know...Clutch doesn't blame her for what happened, no one could have predicted the stag walking out in front of them"

"Would have helped if she hadn't closed Buddy's eyes, ever the practical little jokester, always game for a laugh, you should her right now Matt, laughing in the face of how serious it all gets" Dusty said

"Just make sure she's capable of opening her eyes tomorrow" Matt said.

"I sure do miss the days where you could rely on a Pit stop Catapult for your off-road altercations, these days we have to settle for an unhealthy combo of human nature and ill coincidence...you reckon Gloria is trying to fill the adventurous appetite? You think she's lacking it somewhat?"

"Whatever is troubling Gloria, it's starting to coil around our agents, we already have one serpent in our fold, we just want to make sure Gloria has our head wrapped around the positive layers of life, we all care for her"

"Ah understand partner, come over to my place of work sometime, I'll rustle up some comfort food laced with pepperoni, really broadens the Spectrum. Get it?" Dusty joked, Matt didn't exactly embrace the punch line

"Just...take care of her Dusty" said Matt, and in seconds, his voice left the line

Dusty shook his head. He wondered how things might have been if Matt and Gloria had been a little more headstrong around each other. Gloria seemed embarrassed she ever lost her lunch whenever Matt was compromised. She looked to him as a leader, a father figure, a brother, and then tried translating those feelings, disastrously, into something more.

He felt lucky he hadn't been targeted in quite the same way...except in times where she was at her lowest.

Times such as now, which made him all the more nervous to approach her.

Orders, however, were orders, and so Dusty plucked up the courage and stepped outside to grace Gloria. Dressed in a light navy shirt and grey boxers, his bare feet graced the cool gentle grass. He rubbed his toes in it and purred ever so slightly.

"Man, I sure could just wear this" Dusty said aloud.

"They have shoes with grass all over 'em you know" said a half-weasely and slow voice as Gloria, attired in a red t-shirt and small pink panties, tried to get up. She swayed from side to side and fell down on her kiester once again

"I got in touch with the park ranger a couple of hours ago, we're to move off the site tomorrow. That'll be your fault"

"I'll clean up afterwards" Gloria said

"You've been throwing twenty going on twenty-two large and small pieces of broken glass into the lake Gloria, no one can take a dip without stepping on something cold and sharp. You want to colour this place scarlet?"

"I'll salvage 'em" Gloria replied, "I'm an expert scuba diver...whenever I'm not getting my head smacked against a rock or a rudder...I'm such a head case, get it? Head case, I'm usually on a case and it...it..."

Gloria couldn't even complete her sentence, so drunk was she, that she just collapsed into a series of giggles and wriggled on the grass

Dusty walked over, knelt down beside her and cradled her as her laughs slowly gave way to an emotional release. A slight sense of self-awareness had overtaken her and she was disgusted with herself

"Let's all dance a bit more slowly, ya hear?" Dusty said, "Tell me what's dusty in your Springfield" he continued, hoping Gloria wouldn't pick up on the fact he was asking what kind of sand was up her vaginal canal.

"I'm a mess Dusty, the races...they're over, our missions are fewer, it's all meetings and light bodyguard duty for diplomats, and I can't get my freelance racing license renewed now that our identity's exposed, they think I have an unfair disadvantage. At the risk of doing the right thing, to keep this fragile world's peace last just a little longer, I risked everything and I fell to pieces...but hey, everyone else is content, complete, even Vanessa..."

"Oh don't start this again" Dusty replied

"No, no, you know she's actually starting to write children's books now? She got that from me you know, I thought 'when I have a nice tidy income for a rainy day, I can get into self-publishing, delight a few keen mind. T-Bob offered to help me proof-read and in return I gave him my manuscripts...simplicity. Ha."

Gloria laughed, touching her nose in an erratic fashion, trying to pick away at it but missing her nostrils. Dusty shook his head. He was getting as caught up in Gloria's rant as she was, he could feel anger and sympathy boil and blend together.

"Remember when T-Bob was reprogrammed and briefly assumed leadership of VENOM? I don't think that attitude has left him at all, I think it...it...it...what's the word...LINGERED, oh I'm clever, I remembered that didn't I?" Gloria continued, "Anyway, T-Bob took that manuscript, including a really good romantic twist I had put into my story, and he hands it over to Vanessa, 'cause she told him to, and he obeyed, just like that. As if she were all the family he's ever known...and what does she do? She writes her own version of the twist and has the characters I worked feverishly on marry much more quickly...and then, to make sure I don't change it when the scripts get back to me, she publishes her "edit" of the story before I can get my version out. She credits both of us but she stole my intentions for the characters just so she could beat me to it

"I'm sure she didn't' mean it like that Gloria" Dusty responded, "It sounds more like her fiercely competitive spirit kicking in again, people liked your story didn't they? You really ought to get off this kick of Vanessa not belonging now, I know you've never accepted that darlin' but she's been on our saintly side ever since taking the vow to be Mrs. Turner" Dusty said

"That's what gets me down the most Dusty...the kind of love she and Brand has...it's TRUE. It's all true, I see it in her eyes every day and I can't stand it because I don't know if I'll ever know that, I often feel like I'm settling, and the slightest bit of mischief from me is bound to break everything apart, kind of like it is now"

"Matt called, Buddy's up and speaking, and he forgives you for the joke you pulled, it wasn't your fault"

"He...he forgives me?"

"For a guy with a mask like Penetrator, he sure doesn't need that anymore, you penetrate him in the right spot" Dusty said

In her euphoria, Gloria suddenly remembered she was drunk and resumed the silliness, digging through the case of empty kegs and smashing the edge of one on the side of the container, before tossing another piece of glass into the lake.

"I think we ought to get someone down here" Dusty said, he looked to see if Brad was still there, only to find him slowly enter the tent next to the trailer Dusty shared with Gloria and Buddy.

"You don't want to upset Brad's kids do you?" Gloria reminded him, telling him to shush.

"Kids, there's a nice thought..." she said, "We should think about that a hell of a lot...kids...names too...tell me the first name that comes to your mind, what would you call your kid? I'd call my kid "Billy T. Kidd..Hayes. Or maybe I can call him "Hayes, Billy T. Kidd"...and then I can say 'c'mere, Hayes, HAYES, Billy T. Kidd, C'MERE"

"Why am I always your husband when you're drunk, and something even more when you've had more than the legal limit?" Dusty asked

"'Cause you're always...always...easy...and they say earth girls are that...maybe that's who you are...a big girl...a big sister...after all, girls know how to cook, and you cook up a feast...no, wait, wait, that's not right, Vanessa is a miserable cook..." Gloria rambled on, before letting out a big yawn.

Dusty closed the case of beer and moved it to one side

"Time for bed Gloria" Dusty said, "I reckon the headaches to follow will keep you confined to bed for a doozy of a day, so we'll visit Buddy tomorrow"

" I can make it up to him you know...I'll take him to karate class when he's healed up...I haven't lost that yet...that takes discipline you know, I'm sound at that" Gloria said

"As sound as you are asleep" Dusty replied, smiling, he picked Gloria up, and carried her into the trailer as he wrapped her arms around his neck and drifted off to sleep.

Brad watched the pair retire to the trailer from within his tent, inside was he found his slightly stirring, but completely subdued children tucked up neatly next to their mother, who had been reading them a story wearing a pair of reading glasses.

"She's went through the whole case now" Brad whispered as he crawled into bed alongside his wife.

"She can take in a lot, I'm impressed" Vanessa replied, "I always assumed Sato's uncanny ability to dose quantities of that kind was unparalleled...of course he could never keep a level head with it either, as that one time we danced proved"

"You...danced with Bruce?" Brad said

"Two left feet, and no big shoe is all I'll say about that" Vanessa replied.

Brad tenderly stroked the back of his young daughter Vice's hair, and gently kissed her on the forehead.

"They'll be disappointed they can't go for a dip tomorrow" Brad said, "Gloria's tossed so much in glass that lake it's akin to a well of thorns"

"I'll pick it clean, no worries " Vanessa said

"You could get cut" Brad replied

"So? Add another to the list all over my body, I still owe you a burn for the rifle shot from Condor when I leaned out of Manta that one time" Vanessa replied

"Point taken" Brad said

"Erm...ma'am?" said a soft bubbly metallic voice as T-Bob approached the two

"It better be ready this time, or it'll be T-Off for T-Bob" Vanessa threatened.

T-Bob slowly spilled out a long list of printed paper from his mouth, Vanessa took one page and handed it over to Brad

"Your new book?" Brad said

"Bit of a commentary on all those online memes about you and me" Vanessa explained, "Let me know what you think"

"Why does my fictional daughter have broken home issues, unconventional angst, and an alchahol addiction?" Brad replied as he skimmed through the page.

"Everything you'll never allow to happen is going into this Turner, keeps you on your toes for the future" Vanessa said, kissing Brad on the cheek and tucking herself into bed

"Goodnight dear" she said

"How many pages are you printing out T-Bob?" Brad said

"Oh it's a real saga Mr. Turner, I don't think it's got a real end yet either" T-Bob replied as the papers spilled out

Brad stood upright in bed, looking at more of the pages , contemplating the plight of Gloria , and wondering just how he ended up with the right side of a bad penny on an evening spent near the well of thorns.