New Years Celebration!
A/N: Written for the New Years Challenge. Be warned: funny.
"Oh. My. God." Snape whispered. The room of requirement was filled with teens of all houses, four hours before midnight. Rather, before the new year. He knew something was up when majority of the fifth year stayed for winter break. He grumbled. "Minerva, I told you something was wrong. Just look at them! Booze everywhere!"
"Oh hush up!" the Gryffindor head of house said, "Lighten up! It's a party for Merlin's sake!"
"Wha-- lighten up? Seriously, they're underage!"
"We can have our teacher's party here, so we can supervise them." Minerva sang while walking towards the fire whisky cooler. Snape sighed. Was he the only sane one here?
-:-
"Miss Brown, miss Brown!" Snape yelled while following the drunk teen. "I think you had too much of that fire whiskey!"
"Don't tell me to stop drinking!"she slurred. "*hic* So, shut up or I'll stick my wand up your nose" He was appalled.
"Detention!" he cried, but she was already off snogging with Fred Weasley. He groaned. There was no control!
Meanwhile, Draco Malfoy streaked-- literally, walked naked-- in front of Snape. Pansy Parkinson followed him, also with little clothing.
"Where do you two think you're going, and why are you naked?"
"I'm going to get laid." Draco said drunkley. Pansy winked and drank more of her muggle brand beer.
"Your eyes are as blue as... my drink." she giggled.
"My eyes are black and-- never mind. Run along now." he shook his head. This would be a long night.
-:-
"What a night to be single!" Hermione cried out as she chugged another bottle of fire whiskey. She crept up to Snape and whispered. "C'mon now, don't be such a party pooper."
"Miss Granger! Above everybody else, I would suspect you to be--"
"A good little girl? I'm a Gryffindor." she pouted. "Woops!" she dropped the bottle. "What the hell?" she said
"Miss Granger?"
"Your hair is like.. fire. Me likie." she fluffed his hair.
"That's... interesting..."
"Ooh! Bye, Marcus Flint wants me!" she laughed.
"Oh God." he said.
-:-
"YOU SPIN MY HEAD RIGHT ROUND, RIGHT ROUND, LIKE A RECORD BABY, RIGHT ROUND, ROUND, ROUND!!" the room sang chorally. Luna Lovegood danced on the table with Seamus Finnigan.
"Your dress is like a collage of crap!" he yelled.
"I can take it off!" she replies. And so the strip tease has begun.
"Miss Lovegood! Stop that! You are too young to be doing that!" Snape chided.
"Shut yo' mouth!" Seamus yelled. "I'm enjoying this!"
"Somewhere, a butterfly died." Snape said out loud. Ginny, who happened to be right there, said, "Excuse me?"
"Oh crapppp" he said, his vision blurred. He laughed at nothing and passed out.
"Alright, who spiked the punch bowl?" Ginny asked, pointing to the potions master's sixteen empty cups of punch. Dean Thomas raised his hand slowly. "Dean? Kiss me at midnight."
-:-
Now, officially unsupervised (as the other teachers partying like crazy, and Snape so sound asleep, he looks dead), the kids got more drunk and horney.
Parvati and Luna were talking about how drunk they were after Padma sobered them up (in order to have a fresh start aka: get drunk again)
"I was the most drunk!" Parvati screamed. "I made out with Millicent Bulstrode!"
"At least you haven't stood up on a table and performed a raunchy strip tease before. Now that is drunk!" Luna said.
"True, but at least-- what do you want Harry?" Parvati stopped mid-sentence. Harry smiled. "My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard!" he danced sugestively and ran away, prancing.
"Um, okay.."
"That looks fun! Lets get drunk again!" Luna shrieked as Justin Flinch-Fletchey threw another fire whiskey.
-:-
Lisa Turpin was drunk. Very drunk. She made her way to Neville Longbottom and Hannah Abbot (who were, may I add, snogging) and jumped right in the middle of them.
"Stop...Hammer time!" she started doing the dance, and then passed out.
"Oh no, Lisa passed out again." Hannah said. Neville adjusted their position, letting Lisa fall to the floor. "There, we can kiss now."
"Well, we can't."
"Why?"
"Because of your bloody moaning. Just stop moaning and kiss me."
-:-
Blaise Zabini was dancing, uncontrollably. On the table.
"Go Blaise, go Blaise, go Blaise!"
"DAMN I'M GOOD!" he yelled, swiftly jumping off the table. He took a sip of his drink. "That drink tastes like BEEF!" he said, choking. "I'm so full I think I may throw it all up."
"Okay..." Zacharias Smith said.
"DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT!!!" he ran away sobbing. Well, he ran back to the beer table. He was heard muttering loudly, "You son of a b--ch, w--ker, a---ole, mother f---er!"
Ron whispered to Zacharias, "That's okay, he dances like he's being electrocuted anyway."
-:-
"Get your hands off of my butt, Ron." Susan Bones slapped Ron's hand away.
"Sorry."
"Sure..."
"I was just wondering... did you see that chcken?"
"I think you had one shot too many."
-:-
COUNTDOWN
"Where's the clock Harry?" Lavender asked.
"Um, I broke it."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE IS NO CLOCK?!?!"
"Well, me and Draco shagged and--"
"I don't want to hear about you personal sex life, so its possible we've missed midnight?"
"Well, what does Hermione say?" he pointed to the chatting brunette.
"Harry, can I try on your glasses?" Lavender said.
"Why?"
"That's Romilda Vane, idiot!"
"Oh."
-:-
So, the students of Hogwarts missed midnight.
Pansy Parkinson and Justin Flinch-Fletchy were talking by the corner, talking about the party.
"I was totally wasted. How 'bout you, Pasny?" Justin said while trying to kick a glass of Merlot out of unconscious Professor Trelwney's hand.
"Eh, I had worse. I think I shagged about three people today though." Pansy said nonchalantly.
"Wow."
"Yeah..."
"What's your New Year's resolution?"
"Find another man."
"Oh. You know, when I look into your eyes, something tingles in my stomach."
"Well, stop looking at me like that."
"Ha!" he said. There was an awkward silence. Until, of course, they kissed.
"That was the best kiss I had all night!" Justin said.
"Yep."
"I can't believe we missed midnight! Ugh, I already broke my new years resolution!"
"What was it!?"
"To stop drinking. Oops!" he laughed. He got two wine glasses and gave one to Pansy.
"Here's to another crappy year!"
-:-
Meanwhile, a very drunk cat ran past Collin and Luna.
"Alright, who gave Professor McGonnagal alcohol?"Luna asked.
Alright, thats my response to burning candle light's New Years challenge! Hope you enjoyed it. Review please! Happy New Year guys!
