Hey RC9GN Fandom! It's been a while! Here's a shorty oneshot I wrote up and wanted to post! (Honestly I should probably put it with my oneshot series but I... dont want to touch that ^^)
Oh... I miss these characters so much ^^ I still love Debbie with all my heart x3
Randy Cunningham 9th Grade Ninja (c) Disney XD, Jed Elinoff and Scott Thomas
~0~
With a loud huff of frustration, papers were thrown into the air. They lifelessly floated down, covering the small room in a big mess. Debbie shoved more papers away from her. She scratched Her head, feeling the tangles catch between her fingers as if she hasn't brushed her hair that morning. Her search for the Ninja was driving her mad.
She had no hints, no clues. Nothing more than her current inventory of information. She was at a standstill. Especially when she was getting no new content for the mysterious hero.
A knock interrupted her relapse into her frustration again. Debbie went to the door and opened it, revealing her tall friend.
"Debbie, I was-" Theresa stopped at the state of her friend, then at the room behind her, "this place is a mess!"
Debbie grunted. "Yeah."
Theresa shook her head, "Debbie, I think you need a break."
Debbie waved her off, turning back into the room, "I'm fine, Theresa."
Theresa frowned, "I know you're really into your research, but this is too much." She reached out and grabbed Debbie's wrist, "You need a break."
Debbie wriggled, "Let me go Theresa! I have to keep searching!" Debbie shouldn't have been surprised at her strong grip, she was a baton twirler for goodness sake, but she was.
Theresa shook her head calmly, as if she wasn't cutting the blood flow from her hand. "Nope. Come on, one frozen yogurt at the cafeteria with me."
Debbie groaned, knowing she wouldn't get out of it, "Fine!"
So she followed grumpily, got her berrylicious froyo, and sat down at a table outside, even though Debbie stated that she had a great window in her office when Theresa said she needed to be outside.
Debbie scooped another spoon of the treat into her mouth, feeling the cold cream cool her attitude too.
In front of her, Theresa chartered on about something. The baton twirling club? Or did she just hear Randy's name? Debbie was zoning out.
A couple of students were exiting the school, chatting lightly, and Debbie caught some of their conversation.
"-Ninja's totally a nerd!"
"How the door juice did you think that up? He's a shoob! I bet he's wonk at video games!"
"Okay, yeah, but don't you think he likes dumb jokes? I'm sure there's a word for that kinda thing."
Debbie rolled her eyes. As if. From her experience with the Ninja, she agreed that he liked jokes, but a nerd? A shoob? She couldn't tell.
She took another bite of her yogurt. Something clicked in her head.
From her experience! That was it! She should ask the other students about their experiences with the Ninja! She wasn't the only one with an encounter with him, it would make sense to gather information that others had.
A plan swirled around her head. She would need to talk to some of her supervising teachers, but she was sure they would approve.
Debbie finished the last of her frozen yogurt, then stood up, cutting Theresa off mid-rant. "Thanks, Theresa. That was fun. Gotta go now, though. I just got an idea."
Theresa opened her mouth, mostly speechless, but before she could reply, Debbie rushed away. She dumped her plastic bowl in the trash as she hurried down the hall to find someone to help her carry out her idea.
~0~
Randy glanced at a colorful poster stuck at eye level on his locker, "Hmm, what's this?"
"Something dumb, probably," Howard retorted, not glancing at it.
Randy plucked it off the locker and read it. His eyes widened, "Wow, Howard look at this."
Howard looked at it.
It read, "NHS's first Describe the Ninja competition! Write down your top guesses for the Ninja and win prizes! Judges are Principle Slimovitz, Debbie Kang, and the Ninja himself (if he shows up)!"
Howard scowled, "You didn't tell me you signed up for this!"
Randy pulled away in surprise, "Because I didn't! They just wrote it!"
Howard huffed and crossed his arms. "Well you know what this means."
Randy blinked, "Uhh, it means that the Ninja's gonna show up?"
"Cheese yeah!" Howard cried, "And I'm gonna win!"
Randy grinned, "Yeah!"
The two spun around, completing their complicated secret handshake.
Howard turned back to his locker, as their excitement died down. "What does Kang and P Slimz know about the Ninja, anyways?"
Randy just shrugged, and they soon traveled to their next class.
~0~
"Next!" Debbie called. The next kid in line came up and slipped a small piece of paper into the large box she had, then a bill into the next. "Thank you for submitting in the competition. The final will be held at five. Next."
Debbie watched as it happened again, repeating the same message again. Since Principal Slimovitz agreed with the idea with great enthusiasm, he decided to open the event to all children in the city. There was also a small fee of $3 to support the school. Even so, there was a huge turn up.
Each slip was to have up to 3 guesses about the Ninja. And since they wouldn't be able to read all of the entries on paper, they got the nerd clubs together to figure out a way to compile the information. Debbie hoped they had a system, at least. They came every once in a while to carry away some more of the submissions that had accumulated.
Debbie was only supervising, really. There were so many people, there was no way she would be able to say something to each individual. They generally came up and dropped them in themselves into the large box.
She leaned back in her seat to stretch out her back a little. From her new perspective, she spotted a few papers on the ground that had missed their destination. Debbie reached down and started picking them up, her eyes catching some of the guesses. Cool, awesome, the cheese, was one. Brave, strong, good puncher, was another. Debbie resisted the urge to sigh. These were general descriptions. They wouldn't help her.
Another slip of paper floated down in front of her, and Debbie was about to get up and tell the person to pick it up themselves. She grabbed it instead, deciding not to be bitter about her lack of success. She picked it up and stopped when she saw a glimpse of the message. Unlike the others that were short in their lettering, this one was long. Debbie scanned over the paper.
Ninja: lucky shoob, definitely the cheese, and totally the loser of Grave Puncher 5 no matter what he says.
Debbie jerks up, finding the retreating forms of her classmates Randy Cunningham and Howard Weinerman. The two laughed as they walked away, as if they hadn't just dropped this oddly descriptive message in front of her.
Why was this so specific? Compared to all of the other descriptions, this one seemed… too precise.
Something about their attitude made Debbie feel weird. She had to see what they were doing.
A voice interrupted her as she stood back up, "Ah, Debbie! There you are!"
Debbie turned to find Principal Slimovitz.
"Thank goodness," he sighed, "the computer club needs help with taking up more of the slips. Can you do that for me?"
"Um, actually, I-" Debbie stuttered, trying to figure a way out but not seem like she just wanted to follow her classmates.
"Great!" Slimovitz cut her off, "I'll go get someone to take over here."
Debbie's mouth gaped, but she sighed, picking herself up to the computer club. She would find out what those two shoobs were up to, though. Somehow.
~0~
Principal Slimovitz took up the microphone and climbed the stage that was set up on the school yard. "Welcome everyone! Thank you all for coming to Norrisville High's special Ninja event!" A loud roar called from the crowd of attendees. "We're going to start this judging by going through the list of all the traits submitted! All the entries have been organized from most popular to least popular, and our youngest editor of the NHSGTTDPC online edition, Debbie Kang, and I will be judging them on either being a trait or not being a trait!" He continued, "Debbie Kang has been investigating various events concerning the Ninja, and I, well, I've known the Ninja for almost twenty years now!"
Howard snickered into his hand, "Who's gonna tell him that it's not the same one?"
Randy gasped, shoved Howard slightly, "Quiet, Howard!"
A voice piped up from behind them, "What was that?"
The boys gasped and spun around.
"Debbie Kang?" Randy choked out.
Howard scowled, "The juice are you doing? Aren't you supposed to be judging this thing?"
Debbie grinned mischief twinkling in her eyes as she replied, "Oh I am. I just wanted to see if the Ninja was going to show up or not."
Howard and Randy exchanged uneasy glances.
"I guess he won't," Debbie continued with an easy shrug, "It would be smart to keep away and not upset anyone who's voted wrong." She stepped away, toward the stage, "Catch you shoobs later."
Howard and Randy stared at her as she climbed the stage, taking her seat beside Principle Slimovitz.
"Uhh…" Randy blinked. "What was that?"
Howard frowned, "It was a threat, Cunningham! You know her! Typical Scoops Kang!" He whirled around, grabbing Randy's jacket and pulling him to his face, "You gotta get out there and prove her wrong!"
Randy leaned his head away, "Yeah, okay, but, just hear me out now, didn't she just say that the Ninja shouldn't come out?"
Howard rolled his eyes, "She said that she wants the Ninja to show up!"
Randy paused, going over the conversation in his head. "So, you're telling me that she said that she wants the Ninja to show up because everybody else wants him to show up but she doesn't want him to show up because she might figure out who I am and you want me to show up so that I can win some free stuff?"
Howard released Randy's jacket, causing the taller teen to stumble, "Exactly! I knew you'd get it, Cunningham!"
Randy picked himself up, brushing off his jacket, "Alright!" He leaned down beside Howard, lowering his voice, "Will you excuse me a moment, it's Ninja o'clock!" With that, he ran off, heading towards the restroom.
Howard huffed and rolled his eyes, "Shoob."
Randy slammed the stall door behind him, reaching into his pocket to pull out his mask. A pulse of bright red light caught his eye, stopping him from pulling the mask on. "Oh, right now, Nomicon? I was gonna head out…" The book pulsed twice. Randy sighed, "Okay, cool your cheese, I'm com-" His body dropped, his head hitting the top of the toilet seat as his mind flushed into the world on the book.
"-iiiiinnng!" Randy landed on his back, facing the sky. He sat up, finding himself surrounded by a group of children on the ground, and adults around them, all facing a stage.
"Ooh, is this a show?" Randy cooed.
"Shh!" The kids around him all shushed.
Randy winced, "Oh, sorry, I'll be quiet."
Then, a figure wearing a porcelain white mask with intricate designs got onto the stage. The person started dancing around, causing the audience to cheer. But then, the mask cracked, falling to the ground in two pieces and revealing the doodle Ninja beneath it. The crowd raged, finding fruit to throw at the Ninja as he fled the scene.
Randy watched as the curtains set on the background of the stage morphed with letters. "A Ninja does not deceive to please."
Randy gasped, "Me? Deceive?"
The crowd of people around him turned to face him, throwing their fruits and veggies at him.
Randy raised his arms in defense, but he fell, then shot up again, finding himself on the ground of the bathroom stall. He jumped up, slipping his mask on with a flash of light. It was time for the Ninja's appearance!
~0~
"Smokebomb!"
Debbie wafted the air away from her face as Principle Slimovitz, and the whole crowd, gasped in excitement at the appearance of the hero.
Ninja waved his arms in greeting, "Hello everyone!"
"Ninja!" Principle Slimovitz stood happily, guiding him to the third seat they had set right beside Debbie.
Debbie sent a smirk to Ninja as he sat down.
He gave her a two finger salute, "Debbie Kang."
"Ninja," Debbie greeted, "Nice to see that you could make it."
"Yup," he said, popping the 'p', "I couldn't leave everyone hanging. Especially with you and P. Slimz as the judges."
Debbie faked hurt, "I thought we were friends, Ninja."
"Nope," Ninja replied, his 'p' popping again, before turning to Principle Slimovitz, who was resuming their judging again.
"The next trait that we have is, ignorant." Slimovitz said. "Hm, well I wouldn't say Ninja is very ignorant. I say it's not a trait."
Debbie crossed her arms. Slimovitz probably thought Ninja of some kind of a studious student, which Debbie was sure that he wasn't, or wasn't the best, at least. "I say he is. Does anyone remember the soupcicle story I wrote? Ninja changed his mind suddenly. I don't know why, but there was something that he was obviously ignorant of until it came of attention. Thus, a trait of his."
Ninja scoffed, huffing in denial, "Me? Ignorant? Of course not, that's not a trait of mine."
Debbie rolled her eyes at his behavior, but didn't say anything. Who was she to judge? Oh wait. It didn't matter, Ninja could say what he pleased.
Slimovitz nodded, "Two out of three says not a trait!" An 'X' mark appeared over the word on the digital board behind them.
"Oh come on!" Someone from the crowd cried out.
Slimovitz looked at the list, "Next is cowardly."
Ninja choked up from beside Debbie, causing her to shoot him a glare. What a shoob.
"I'm going to say that the Ninja isn't cowardly, I mean, have you guys seen how many times he's jumped into battle?" Slimovitz said.
Debbie nodded, "Ninja isn't cowardly. He might be a shoob-" she ignored his gasp- "but he's not a coward. Not a trait."
"...Not a trait." Ninja said simply, possibly upset.
Cowardly was crossed out on the list.
"Our next trait is uncritical." Slimovitz read. "I'm going to have to say no to this one, too. Ninja's gotta defeat all these robots, he knows how to do it!"
"He does have to analyze his situation during his battles. He is critical, so it's not a trait of his." Debbie agreed.
"You are both right," Ninja said. "Me. The most critical."
Debbie raised an eyebrow at the masked hero.
"Moving onto our next word," Slimovitz started, "it is-"
"No!" Someone shouted from the crowd. "It's not fair! It's not right!" The people backed away, creating a clearing with a single person shouting angrily from the center. "I know him! I know the Ninja! He's all of those things!"
Debbie gasped as a green gas surrounded the person, distorting their body until it turned into a hideous creature with wings. It looked like a demon owl, sort of. Debbie grabbed her trusty camera that was hanging at her side and started snapping pictures.
People screamed, rushing away from the monster as it charged towards the stage. A red scarf suddenly wrapped around her abdomen and pulled her back, right as the monster rampaged into the spot she previously stood at.
Ninja caught her by the shoulders, pulling her away, "Get back!"
Debbie nodded, rushing off to find safety in some bushes, with her camera peaking out and trained on the action.
~0~
"Okay, think," Ninja muttered to himself, "how to defeat this monster." He leaped out of the way, as the owl monster grabbed a large speaker and threw it at him.
"My car!" Principle Slimovitz shouted from somewhere.
Ninja ducked another throw of a chunk of the stage, but missed the next one. He was thrown backwards to the wall of the school.
"Ha, good going Ninja."
Ninja groaned, "Howard. It's not my fault."
Howard rolled his eyes, "It sure is. You're the one lying!"
"I thought you said to win stuff!" Ninja retorted.
"Not lie!" Howard stated. "Now this shoob is wrecking the whole place!" He paused, letting out a laugh, "Though seeing all the computer shoobs crying about their broken stuff is going to be fun."
Ninja frowned, his eyes twisting up.
"Oh, it's the face," Howard stated.
"I've got it!" Ninja cried, flipping to a stand, "Nomicon said that ninja's don't deceive to please! And I've been deceiving everyone here!"
"Uh, yeah-" Howard started, letting out a yelp as he ducked back into the bushes.
Ninja ran towards the monster, jumping up and kicking it in the chest, causing it to fall over. He ran to the stage, standing on the highest still standing speaker. "Citizens of Norrisville! I have an admission to make to you all!" The people gathered around. "I lied." Gasps escaped from people as they muttered in shock. "I lied to you all, and I'm sorry," Ninja ducked his head. "In truth, I really am a ignorant, cowardly, uncritical person. I'm just a shoob with luck and I honestly suck at Grave Puncher Five!"
Ninja watched as the owl creature slowly destanked into his own self again, the green gas escaping into the vents under the school. He turned to Principle Slimovitz, "I'm sorry, Principle Slimovitz, this was a bad idea."
Slimovitz nodded, putting his hands on his hips and staring at the destruction, "I agree."
Ninja flipped off the speaker and pulled out a smokebomb to disappear, but stopped short at the sight of Debbie approaching him.
Debbie narrowed her eyes and spoke, "I'll figure you out, Ninja."
Ninja laughed, giving the reporter a wink, "I'm sure you will, Debbie Kang. Smokebomb!"
Debbie scowled and huffed away.
"Boom!" Heidi shouted into her McFist Pad camera, talking to her live audience, "This just in! The Ninja is humble!"
Randy's eyes widened, "Howard! Did you hear that? The Ninja's humble!"
Howard shoved Randy, "Heidi's as much of a shoob as the Ninja is! You ain't humble!"
Randy laughed and shrugged, "I don't make the rules, Howard."
"Ugh, I cannot believe you. This totally wonked up my weekend!" Howard shouted.
Randy shook his head, "Let's just go home and play some Grave Punchers."
"Five?" Howard asked, skeptical.
Randy sighed and nodded.
"Alright!" Howard cheered, "Your cheese is mine!"
Randy just groaned as the two escaped the mess left behind on the school yard.
~0~
Debbie scratched down her message on her notepad and ripped it out. She pinned it to her board to the side, pulling a red string and attaching it to the others. On the note it read, "Ninja: lucky shoob, sucks at Grave Punchers 5. Possible connection to Howard Weinerman and/or Randy Cunningham."
She stepped away from the board and glanced at it, then went to exit her office. "Hey Theresa," Debbie greeted her friend as she shut the door behind her.
~0~
This story is for and based on a three sentence fic that ladylynse (Lynse on ff) posted on tumblr!
