So yeah I wrote a fic based on the line from Doctor Who 'The basic fact of our relationship is that I love you more than you love me'. I hope you like it.
Sherlock wasn't quite sure how they had ended up in this situation. Both he and John were standing in an abandoned part of the London sewer system with their hands tied behind their backs and guns pointed at their heads. There were a total of four other men surrounding them: two of them with a gun each trained at Sherlock and John; one covering the entrance, also with a gun and Sherlock had to admire them for their dedication to weaponry, and the last one, clearly the ringleader also with a gun ('really' Sherlock thought to himself 'this group was almost laughable') leering cruelly at them.
"So…" the man smiled slightly "You two get to decide which one of you I kill. That is my deal. One of you puts yourself forward to be killed now and the other gets to walk free. Quite a nice and kind proposition I thought."
There was a moment's pause before John stepped forward. He looked the man in eye.
"Kill me" he stated simply, slightly politely, almost as if he were just ordering food at Angelo's. Sherlock look at him; John was perfectly calm. There was no hint of the tremor in his hand and he was holding himself with his military bearing.
"John" Sherlock began to protest before John cut him off.
"No Sherlock listen to me; this is the way it has to happen. Whatever they do to me cannot be as painful as watching them do it to you. I cannot watch you die again; please don't make me" Sherlock was unable to respond to that and so John continued, "Look you'll be fine without me and they say they will let you go. It has to be me Sherlock. The basic fact of our relationship is that I love you more than you love me." Sherlock was stunned into silence and as the man raised his gun to John's head Lestrade and a team from Scotland Yard charged in, taking down their captors and arresting them.
Sherlock had a lot of time to think over John's words as they were questioned and had to write up their report on what had happened once they returned to Scotland Yard. Lestrade seemed particularly annoyed that Sherlock had just gone in without their backup, even though he had texted the address to Lestrade before he and John had ventured in. John didn't seem to be acting any differently after what he had said. Sherlock tuned out of Lestrade's lecture to consider it. Did John really think that Sherlock didn't love him or love him as much as John loved Sherlock? Had he really not shown John how much he cared for him? Sherlock may not have been the expressive person but he had always assumed that John had known how he felt. Since they had been together he hadn't tried to poison John in anyway and he had even agreed to keep his experiments out of the fridge after John had bought him a small mini fridge to use. Sherlock began to panic as he realised that if John did not think that he loved him surely John would leave and find someone who he thought love him properly. Sherlock snapped out of his thoughts to find both John and Lestrade starring worriedly at him as he realised that he was gripping the arms of his chair so tightly that his fingers had turned white. Lestrade finished whatever he had been saying and let the two of them go, shaking his head as he knew Sherlock had not been listening to what he had been saying.
Sherlock kept a close eye on John all the way home and after they had entered the flat. John hung up his coat and turned to Sherlock. "Tea?" he asked.
"Let me" Sherlock offered, slightly overenthusiastically and although John looked confused he simply shrugged and went to sit down in his chair. Sherlock decided that if he tried to be as helpful as possible then maybe John wouldn't decide to leave. He had not really counted on John being suspicious of his helping. When John came down for breakfast the following morning to find that the kitchen table had been cleared and Sherlock has been out to get milk he looked at Sherlock, who was reclining on the sofa, slightly concerned.
"Is everything okay Sherlock?" he asked as he made himself a cup of tea and then went to sit down opposite Sherlock.
"Yes John why wouldn't it be okay?"
"Well it is just that everything clean and there's milk and I was wondering why" John responded.
"Am I not allowed to do that?" Sherlock asked, slightly affronted.
"Of course you can" John replied "it is just that you don't"
"Well I wanted to"
"Um… okay" John replied, clearly still uncertain and continuing to look slightly quizzical. Sherlock swallowed before he begun to speak.
"It is just John… I do not want you to leave" Sherlock admitted. John looked at Sherlock, surprised.
"What do you mean?" John asked.
"I mean I do not want you to try and find someone that you think loves you more than me and leave me for them" Sherlock explained, letting a small amount of the fear he felt seep into his voice.
"Oh Sherlock… is that about what I said yesterday?" John asked and, not allowing himself to speak, Sherlock nodded. John placed down his cup of tea and moved over to sit on the sofa with Sherlock's head resting on his shoulder. "Sherlock don't worry about that. I knew before we started this relationship that you were married to you work and that I would always love you more than you loved me." John had just finished his sentence before Sherlock's fist connected with the side of his face. John fell backwards slightly and ended up lying on the sofa with Sherlock straddling him, glaring down at him furiously.
"How can you say something like that?" Sherlock asked angrily and considering his current position John thought it would be wise to stay quiet. "How can you say that after everything we have been through together and how much I care about you?" Sherlock continued.
"Sherlock you said when we first met that you were married to your work and I entered this relationship knowing that I would always come second to that" John told him.
"Yes John that was when we first met before I properly knew you and understood how much I needed you and how much you mean to me. Now John the cases come second to you, everything comes second to you. I need you so much and I have no idea what I would do without you. I was prepared to die jumping off that building because I knew it would keep you safe. I love you John Watson" Sherlock said, realising that this was the first time he had told John that he loved him and mentally kicked himself for that. John blinked up him, looking a little bit stunned.
"Really?" he asked, hesitantly as if he could not believe what Sherlock had just said.
"Of course you idiot. Of course I do. I love you!" Sherlock exclaimed. John looked up at Sherlock, possibly happier than Sherlock had ever seen him before and managed to pull Sherlock down for a kiss
"I love you too Sherlock" John whispered.
