Author's Notes

Being a longtime fan of David Carradine, I was of course inclined to find the character of Bill fascinating. But, after watching Kill Bill, particularly volume two, I was really impressed by David's portrayal of both an evil and yet somehow sympathetic character. Bill became a human being, after being portrayed as much more of a distant "monster" figure in the first volume. This was not how I thought things would turn out, and I was pleasantly surprised.

Was Bill the real villain of the movie?

I don't know. But, what I found worth exploring what had made him what he was, questionable villain or not. What events shaped him to become the leader of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad, a murdering bastard, and the type of man who would shoot his former lover point blank in the head?

I found the idea interesting and challenging and decided to try and write a little fanfic of Bill's life. I know there are other similar fanfics out there and this is just my interpretation of a story that no doubt could take on many different forms. This story WILL be finished, but it may just take me some time to update each chapter, so I apologize right off the bat for the amount of time this could possibly take to finish.

In the meantime, (shameless plug coming your way) please check out my friend Jess and I's joint fanfic "Kill Bill: Prequel 1 and 2" here in the list of Kill Bill stories (Jess writes Bea and I write Bill, I think it's worked out very well!) There will be some definite ties between this fanfic and those. Jess will also be writing for Beatrix in the later chapters of this fic.

All cannon Kill Bill characters belong to Q and U. All others are my creations. I have some thank you's, but I'll save them for the end.

(Note: I have decided to drop the rating of this story to PG-13 for at least the first chapter. It may go back up to R, due to the following.)

This story is rated a definite "R" for excessively foul language, disturbing situations, drug use, drug references, sex (but not explicitly so), sexual situations, adult situations, gore, violence, and lots of run on sentences. If you are highly offended by these things then you may want to skip this fic. But, if that doesn't deter you, then please read both the Prologue and the Epilogue with the rest of the story!

Thank you ahead of time for reading my little fic! And please, please give me some feedback if you feel so inclined. I've put allot of work into this and would love to know what you think!

Mel

Prologue

Dreaming About Her

"Shall I tell you about my life?

They say I'm a man of the world.

I've flown across every tide

And I've seen lots of pretty girls.

I guess I've got everything I need.

I wouldn't ask for more.

And there's no one I'd rather be

But I just wish that I'd never been born."

Fleetwood Mac – Man of the World

"B.B…..baby can you please clean up?"

There were toys everywhere; scattered haphazardly around the spacious and very stylish girl's room. Bill bent down and scooped up a small plastic katana, decorated in obnoxious bright colorings and painted in a completely inaccurate styling. He examined it with a frown, before glancing up with annoyance.

"B.B, I'm being serious," he reiterated in a parental warning tone, as he tossed the sword into the big toy chest that sat in the corner of the room.

The little girl thought she was being sneaky, but Bill could easily see two small feet protruding out from the corner of her large bed. Little digits wiggled in amusement as she apparently thought she had him good and fooled.

"I can see you," Bill sighed, crossing his arms. Normally he'd be more than happy to play along with her little game, but tonight was no ordinary night, tonight was a very special night. "Come on out honey, we don't have time for this right now."

He could hear her reluctant little huff from deep within the depths of mattress. "Oh…alright….," her tiny childish voice replied. A moment later the little girl had easily managed to crawl out from her cramped hiding spot and stood up with a deep frown. With an expression of defiance, she crossed her own small arms over her long nightgown, mirroring the posture of the man standing in front of her.

Bill couldn't help but smile at the sight, but it was a tighter smile than normal. "Remember what I told you earlier B.B.…about mommy waking up and coming to see you?"

The little girl nodded solemnly but with signs of quickly dawning excitement on her face. "Is she awake now? Is the coming here?"

"Yes. Well, she's coming very soon. Don't you want her to see how clean your room is? I think she'll be very happy to know you cleaned up just for her."

B.B. seemed to think this over for a minute, and then coming to a conclusion in her innocent mind, she gave a sharp nod, "Yes, she would be happy about that."

Bill chuckled lightly at this very noble attempt at adult agreement and his look increased in warmth as he lovingly looked upon the miniature human being standing in front of him. B.B. was four. She had thick dark brown hair and big brown eyes. She was a beautiful child, both smart and funny. He was proud to say she was his daughter. She was everything he could have wanted in a child, if he had wanted one. Nonetheless, she was his and he couldn't imagine his life without her now that she was in it.

"Come here honey, daddy's going to tell you something," he crouched down in front of his daughter, hands falling lovingly on her tiny shoulders. He fixed her with a serious look, "Now…remember what I told you about mommy? About how she's probably going to be a little sad and maybe even very mad at daddy when she comes here to see us?"

"Mmmhmm," B.B. nodded, her large eyes fixated on her father.

"I want you to make her feel very special, ok? Do you know why?" He paused, a gentler look replacing the former serious one, "Because mommy is a very special person."

B.B. leaned her head to the side, a hand swiping away locks of dark hair, "Why is she special?"

"Well," Bill gave his daughter a small smile, as he sat down cross legged next to her, "She's very special…..because she's your mommy and because I love her very much."

"I love her too daddy," B.B. replied possessively as she crawled up next to him, lying her head on his crossed leg.

"Of course you do baby," he stroked her hair lovingly, eyes downcast with affection "you still dream about her don't' you?"

"Uh huh….lots…."

"Me too….," Bill said quietly, trailing off. His weathered gaze slowly lifted from his daughter and wandered into the corner of the room. There was a flicker of sadness in the hard worn and some would say menacing face that so personified Bill. He was a killer, a bastard….some would even say a monster, but he was still a father. He was not a man incapable of love or compassion.

The monster and his daughter sat like that for a few quiet moments, each lost in their own separate and no doubt incredibly different mental worlds.

Willing himself out of his dark thoughts, Bill looked back down at his daughter. "Ok, B.B.…." He gently pulled her up, "Time to clean. And when we're done cleaning, then we'll play." He gave her a sly smile "And I know just the game….." With a little flick of the wrists, Bill pulled a small squirt gun out from each of his pants pockets as if they were duel six shooters.

B.B. grinned, reaching for one of the squirt guns, which her father quickly pulled away.

"Not yet little missy…," he raised a brow, "…remember, clean up first…and then," he faintly pressed the butt of the plastic guns against her button nose, "….then we'll play possum for mommy." The little girl laughed, thinking her father endlessly entertaining. "Now, "Bill stood up and turned around to survey the room, "...where in this mess, my dear, shall we start?"