Disclaimer: I do not own Sirius or Harry. They belong to JK Rowling, as does the world of HP.
Characters: Sirius Black, Harry Potter
Pairings: One sided Sirius/Harry
Warnings: I guess barely there chan but only thoughts.
Summary: He knows he shouldn't be here, doing this. He knows he shouldn't be lusting over his godson. He knows his mind should not be conjuring tempting mental pictures. He knows his eyes shouldn't be following the line of Harry's body. Sirius knows all this.
Okay, don't know where this came from. I was just browsing FFN and this bunny popped into my mind.
xxxXxxx
Sirius likes to watch.
He is doing that now. His pale eyes are riveted on the body sprawled on the bed. Harry has kicked the blankets off, it being a hot night and sleeps in only his boxers. He is on his stomach, arms by his side. His face is turned towards Sirius, the lashes dark on his pale skin like his hair is dark on the whiteness of the pillow. For that is what Harry is. A creature of contradictions and contrasts.
His slow, rhythmic breathing is loud in Sirius's ears.
Every night his hands clench on the seat of the wooden chair - always wooden - while he resists the urge to move. To move across the room, just ten steps, he knows this, he's counted them, and touch. Touch the sleeping angel on the bed.
And then what?
Sirius ponders that through the hours, his mouth dry. Then what? What would he do? Rape him?
To do that would be the ultimate betrayal of trust. He knows Harry is a virgin from the stumbling conversations, the bright blush on his cheeks. How he ducks his head, embarrassed by the topic. How Sirius reaches out and ruffles his hair, all the while wishing to trail his hand down further...
But rape would be the only thing that would let Sirius make love to his godson. The thought both sickens and arouses him. A wave of nausea washes over him even as he feels the stirrings in his groin. The feelings are closely followed by guilt.
Yet they are not enough to make him stop this routine his life has fallen into. Play the part of loving, parental godfather during the day. Sleep until midnight. Sneak into Harry's room. Watch. Slink back to his room when light peeks through the blinds.
Sirius knows there is something wrong with him. He knows he shouldn't be here, doing this. He knows he shouldn't be lusting over his godson. He knows his mind should not be conjuring tempting mental pictures. He knows his eyes shouldn't be following the line of Harry's body. Sirius knows all this.
Yet it is not enough for him to stop.