The demigods discuss…THEIR PARENTS!
NICO- ooh, ooh, ooh! Let me go first! PLEEEEEAAAASE!
HADES- why, am I that bad?
NICO- oh, you're not just bad, you're TERRIBLE! *ignores Hades* OOH! OOH! PICK ME OR I WILL KILL YOU ALL WITH MY CHAUFFER. *death glare*
ME- erm, OK. Guys, due to certain issues, *edges away from Nico*, Nico will go first.
NICO- first of all, *plunks down huge briefcase on laptop*, I would like to talk about my dad's, ahem, SOCIAL SKILLS. *sniggers*
HADES- hey, I'm not the only one who's socially IMPAIRED. * glares at Nico*
*several minutes of father-son bonding/chairs flying*
ME- sorry, Nico, this is not a courtroom. *thinks for a second* Or WW III So, who's next?
NICO- hey! But I wasn't finish-
PERCY- finally! My turn!
ANNABETH- what do you have to say about Poseidon, hmmmmm?
PERCY- erm, uhhh, ummm… *scratches head in deep thought for about ten minutes* OH YEAH! I GOT IT! This one time, on father's day, I spent a few hours with Paul Blowfis and then I spent the remainder of the day with Poseidon, and we went to a beach in the Mediterranean, and, thankfully, I was alone with my Dad, and, while we were drinking bubble tea and eating nachos at this awesome beachside café, he told me to tell him one embarrassing thing about myself, so I perfectly described my first day at camp where I made the toilets explode all over Clarisse and I got claimed and etcetera, etcetera. So then I asked him to tell me something embarrassing about himself after he was finished snorting bubble tea up his nose. So then….
POSEIDON- don't. you. dare.
PERCY- LET ME FINISH!
PERCY- …. He told me that this one time in Vatican City, while he was on vacation with his pal, Delphis….
POSEIDON- NONONONONONONONONONONONONONO WHERE THE BLOODY HELL IS MY TRIDENT NO OFFENSE BROTHER HADES BUT WHERE IS MY FREAKIN' TRIDENT AMPHITRITE DID YOU TAKE IT OUT FOR POLISHING FOR WHICH I HAVE NO GODDAMN USE FOR DELPHIS GET ME MY BLOODY TRIDENT OR I WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER MARIO KART 7 VIDEO GAME CONTEST EVER AGAIN AND OH BY THE WAY BROTHER HADES YOU OWE ME 50 BUCKS BECAUSE I BEAT YOU IN THAT DUMB WAYS TO DIE GAMEATHON FAIR-AND-SQUARE! *deep breaths*
WHOLE WORLD- wow.
POSEIDON- oh yeah. Poseidon rules. *cheap swag dance*
PERCY- uhhh…Dad?
POSEIDON- *in the middle of cheap swag dance* ya?
PERCY- you just told them the dam secret.
*Poseidon freezes in the middle of his cheap swag dance*
POSEIDON- uhhh…ummm…errr…errmmm… *logs off*
PERCY- so there you have it, people! Poseidon, son of Kronos and Rhea, grandson of Mother Gaea, father of horses, sea salt nachos, and me, the Earthshaker, the Stormbringer, Supreme Ruler of the Waters, Sea, Beaches, Surfboards, among others, is addicted to Mario Kart! And for some reason, dumb ways to die also! *bows as if he has accomplished something great*
PIPER- soooooo….my turn?
ME- yup.
PIPER- OK. On my first day at CHB, when I got claimed by Aphrodite and I turned all hot and whatever-
JASON-*drools all over laptop while lavishing the memory*
WHOLE WORLD (MINUS APHRODITE) - *HEART ATTACK.*
PIPER- oooookkayyyyyy…so, anyway, I was wearing my favourite-est stuff in the whole wide world, and-*sniff*-I got *pause for emphasis* MUGGED! BY APHRODITE! FOR A BATHROBE WITHOUT SLEEVES! WAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
ME-mmmmmmhhhhhmmmm, mugged by your own mom, yes, these are just a few of *cough* APHRODITE'S ACTS OF MENACE. NOW, NOT EVEN HER CHILDREN ARE SAFE.
APHRODITE-*logs on after applying heavy makeup* who are we all talking about now, dearies?
WHOLE WORLD- *shuffles away from Aphrodite*
ME- does anyone have a delete history button?
APHRODITE- but, anyway, I don't have time for these petty things. I have better and more important things to do.
WHOLE WORLD- such as…?*shudder*
APHRODITE- apply more makeup, of course. Toodleoo! *logs off*
WHOLE WORLD- PHEW! *chicken dance*
NEXT WEEK!- DISSCUSSION ABOUT WHETHER HERMES SHOULD GO TO JAIL OR NOT, BEING THE GOD OF THEIVES AND WHATNOT.