A/N:
Thoughts
Kurai stood on the top of a high building in Tokyo, watching the city's lights.She didn't knew wether it was late night or early morning.Not like she cared anyway. She had no idea how much time she spent there.All she could remember was that she got there at sunset and just...stood there.The warm night was the only one keeping her company,as the lights of the cars kept on moving and moving on the streets and highways , slowly dissapearing somewhere beyond the high buildings.
She sighed.
She was supposed to do what now ? So many new feelings for her , so many things she had no idea she could find inside herself.The scariest thing of all was that she felt like she was just starting to know herself,to discover new ideas and emotions.It was not her fault damn it !
"Damn hormones...." She whispered sarcastically to herself.She laughed slowly.
The image of a beautiful brown pair of eyes gazing at her and cherry lips smiling at her struck her and made her feel butterflies inside.It was a pleasant feeling, a warmth filled her from within.All the times those eyes gazed at her filled with goodness and love....
Then she only wanted to fight and revenge her family. Now she found out it was much more to that.Now she found out there was so much more than gratitude that she felt for Alexiel.It was then when they both sit and talked , when Alexiel showed her hands,her warrior hands, when Kurai told her she will protect her for eternity. Indeed she will. She never gave up on her promise, even when Alexiel was chained she would sneak at night alone , dressed in her pajamas and sometimes she just stood there on the cold cement and watched her.
Watched how her hair fell on her face , watched her lips.She stood there waiting for her lips to move , to say something. She missed her voice so much, that voice that shouted words of encouragement for the rebel angels , that voice could be so tender sometimes.
Kurai was too little to realize when the motherly love she held for Alexiel became much more.Became love in that special way.
She fought it day and night , concentrating on anything else , fighting and shouting at everyone , telling herself that she loves Setsuna more.Didn't worked. She indeed loved Setsuna but tried to take her mind off him also.His love for Sara was beyond everything she could do,she did her best, didn't she ? But nothing worked, she saw Alexiel almost daily , wherever she went Alexiel was there.It hurted and made her feel good in the same time.She found herself so many times gazing at her , she found herself finding any reason to be close to her , to hold her hand , to feel her hair brushing her face.
She owed everything to Alexiel. She owed her life to Alexiel! She should be grateful for that and stop actually begging for more.But it was something she couldn't do.
A shadow crept somewhere behind her, she didn't noticed until a hand dropped on her shoulder and scared her.
"YOU........Oh...it was you......."
"Sorry if I scared you ! " She rised her hand off her shoulder laughing.
Don't do this to me...don't smile...
" What are you doing here at this time of the morning?"
Oh so it was morning afterall....
"Nothing...just thinking "
"About ? "
She asked sitting next to her.The wind blew and made her hair dance along with the wind,small curls tenderly whipping her face.
"Uh......Nothing important , really...." She replied not looking at her.
Alexiel closed her eyes and smiled.The hair was , once again playing on her face.
" I don't believe you."
"Huh?"
Alexiel whipped away with her hand some of her hair off her face and the moon lighted it ,making her face look like a pocelain doll's .She was perfect.
"Well let's see....you stod here all night long.It's almost morning you know,that means something bothers you, but I can't seem to find out what...."
As she finished the last words she turned her face at Kurai, and caught her gazing deeply at her. Even tough outside it was warm , a cold chill rushed on Kurai's spine.
" And don't you dare to tell me it's nothing because I know you ever since you were little, and I can tell when something's right or wrong with you."
Kurai smiled sadly.
"Nah....you know...teenage stuff.Nothing to worry about , really."
Silence.Only the noise of the city could be heard and the whispers of the wind.
Telling her is the stupidest idea I've ever had.......She shook her head.
" I should be going now, you said yourself I spent too much time here anyway" She said rising and starting to walk.
"Okay then....Good night Kurai , or what's left of it....." She giggled " Love you!" She turned to face the small demon gazing back at her.
" Good night Alexiel. Love you too." And she started walking, dissapearing in the shadows on the stairs.If only Alexiel knew she really meant those last three words...
As soon as Kurai left , Alexiel's smile vanished and her face turned into a complete sadness.She cared so much for the little demon,she was like a daughter she never had.It hurted her seeing that she got buried deeper and deeper in herself , not letting anyone , not even her , Alexiel ,get inside her soul , just a bit. Kurai has been so troubeled ever since she 'died' and even now when she came back to life.Maybe it was because of all that time she was 'dead' and away from her ....
She fought so hard to keep her promise.She always kept her promise no matter how hard it was. She fought to keep her safe.She struggeled so much that she completely forgot about herself,everything a girl her age should of been was lost somewhere inside.She got eaten up day by day by so many problems , by so many feelings that , sometimes she taught that her little demon became a machine. Tough she always was capable of keeping everything in order,she always made time to get up on her dragon to fly and help the others , to fly up in the sky to be where the heart of the one she loves called her.
It was so bad that he didn't returned love... Maybe hat would save Kurai from self destruction. Because , in her opinion hat was what Kurai was doing , she was destructing herself without even knowing it.But what could she do ? She was Organic Angel Alexiel and she couldn't do anything for one of the few people that cared for her truly.
Why is everything suddenly burning down to ashes?
Kurai stood on the top of a high building in Tokyo, watching the city's lights.She didn't knew wether it was late night or early morning.Not like she cared anyway. She had no idea how much time she spent there.All she could remember was that she got there at sunset and just...stood there.The warm night was the only one keeping her company,as the lights of the cars kept on moving and moving on the streets and highways , slowly dissapearing somewhere beyond the high buildings.
She sighed.
She was supposed to do what now ? So many new feelings for her , so many things she had no idea she could find inside herself.The scariest thing of all was that she felt like she was just starting to know herself,to discover new ideas and emotions.It was not her fault damn it !
"Damn hormones...." She whispered sarcastically to herself.She laughed slowly.
The image of a beautiful brown pair of eyes gazing at her and cherry lips smiling at her struck her and made her feel butterflies inside.It was a pleasant feeling, a warmth filled her from within.All the times those eyes gazed at her filled with goodness and love....
Then she only wanted to fight and revenge her family. Now she found out it was much more to that.Now she found out there was so much more than gratitude that she felt for Alexiel.It was then when they both sit and talked , when Alexiel showed her hands,her warrior hands, when Kurai told her she will protect her for eternity. Indeed she will. She never gave up on her promise, even when Alexiel was chained she would sneak at night alone , dressed in her pajamas and sometimes she just stood there on the cold cement and watched her.
Watched how her hair fell on her face , watched her lips.She stood there waiting for her lips to move , to say something. She missed her voice so much, that voice that shouted words of encouragement for the rebel angels , that voice could be so tender sometimes.
Kurai was too little to realize when the motherly love she held for Alexiel became much more.Became love in that special way.
She fought it day and night , concentrating on anything else , fighting and shouting at everyone , telling herself that she loves Setsuna more.Didn't worked. She indeed loved Setsuna but tried to take her mind off him also.His love for Sara was beyond everything she could do,she did her best, didn't she ? But nothing worked, she saw Alexiel almost daily , wherever she went Alexiel was there.It hurted and made her feel good in the same time.She found herself so many times gazing at her , she found herself finding any reason to be close to her , to hold her hand , to feel her hair brushing her face.
She owed everything to Alexiel. She owed her life to Alexiel! She should be grateful for that and stop actually begging for more.But it was something she couldn't do.
A shadow crept somewhere behind her, she didn't noticed until a hand dropped on her shoulder and scared her.
"YOU........Oh...it was you......."
"Sorry if I scared you ! " She rised her hand off her shoulder laughing.
Don't do this to me...don't smile...
" What are you doing here at this time of the morning?"
Oh so it was morning afterall....
"Nothing...just thinking "
"About ? "
She asked sitting next to her.The wind blew and made her hair dance along with the wind,small curls tenderly whipping her face.
"Uh......Nothing important , really...." She replied not looking at her.
Alexiel closed her eyes and smiled.The hair was , once again playing on her face.
" I don't believe you."
"Huh?"
Alexiel whipped away with her hand some of her hair off her face and the moon lighted it ,making her face look like a pocelain doll's .She was perfect.
"Well let's see....you stod here all night long.It's almost morning you know,that means something bothers you, but I can't seem to find out what...."
As she finished the last words she turned her face at Kurai, and caught her gazing deeply at her. Even tough outside it was warm , a cold chill rushed on Kurai's spine.
" And don't you dare to tell me it's nothing because I know you ever since you were little, and I can tell when something's right or wrong with you."
Kurai smiled sadly.
"Nah....you know...teenage stuff.Nothing to worry about , really."
Silence.Only the noise of the city could be heard and the whispers of the wind.
Telling her is the stupidest idea I've ever had.......She shook her head.
" I should be going now, you said yourself I spent too much time here anyway" She said rising and starting to walk.
"Okay then....Good night Kurai , or what's left of it....." She giggled " Love you!" She turned to face the small demon gazing back at her.
" Good night Alexiel. Love you too." And she started walking, dissapearing in the shadows on the stairs.If only Alexiel knew she really meant those last three words...
As soon as Kurai left , Alexiel's smile vanished and her face turned into a complete sadness.She cared so much for the little demon,she was like a daughter she never had.It hurted her seeing that she got buried deeper and deeper in herself , not letting anyone , not even her , Alexiel ,get inside her soul , just a bit. Kurai has been so troubeled ever since she 'died' and even now when she came back to life.Maybe it was because of all that time she was 'dead' and away from her ....
She fought so hard to keep her promise.She always kept her promise no matter how hard it was. She fought to keep her safe.She struggeled so much that she completely forgot about herself,everything a girl her age should of been was lost somewhere inside.She got eaten up day by day by so many problems , by so many feelings that , sometimes she taught that her little demon became a machine. Tough she always was capable of keeping everything in order,she always made time to get up on her dragon to fly and help the others , to fly up in the sky to be where the heart of the one she loves called her.
It was so bad that he didn't returned love... Maybe hat would save Kurai from self destruction. Because , in her opinion hat was what Kurai was doing , she was destructing herself without even knowing it.But what could she do ? She was Organic Angel Alexiel and she couldn't do anything for one of the few people that cared for her truly.
Why is everything suddenly burning down to ashes?