We Title: Reunion

Name: Misha

E-mail:

Rating: R - NC-17 depending on the chapter.

Category: BtVS S2

Content: A/C romance, A/C angst, A/B angst (As Always)

Summary: Book One-Cordelia, instead of Buffy, meets up with Angel and both their lives are changed forever. Book Two-Six years later, both Cordelia and Angel return to Sunnydale, but things are not how they once were. Cryptic, yes, but necessary.

Spoilers: BtVS S2 up to I Only Have Eyes for You.

Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't claim them.

Distribution: Want some? Come get some…but hit me up beforehand.

Notes: Willow restored Angel's soul. Angel is wracked with guilt, Buffy's sad because her boyfriend was a psycho killer, she convinced the other's not to kill him, Cordelia's parent are MIA, and I think that's about it.

Thanks/Dedication: My readers/commenters. Thanks for the support and the e-mails.

Feedback: Hell yeah.

Book One

Chapter One

The soft yellow glow of the moon cast an eerie gleam over the hot Sunnydale evening. A warm breeze ruffled the leaves of tall, dark trees, creating a whistling that passed through the quiet cemetery.

Angel walked past tombstones, dragging his feet. His hands were shoved deep in his pockets and he hung his head as he walked slowly, allowing the hot wind to engulf his being. He kept his eyes on the ground, ears straining to pick up any sound that could come from a vampire or demon.

He continued to walk, his mind focusing on the past few months, even as he tried to push the thoughts away. Every day he was tortured with a new memory of Angelus' actions. He patrolled the cemetery, hoping to come across something to take his frustration and pain out on.

Fighting was Angel's clarity. As Angelus, the vampire thrived on the fight, murder and sex. As Angel, sex was now something beyond his reach. Murder was tied in with the fight, but not how it had been when he was Angelus. Now, fighting was Angel's escape. It helped him release the pain and guilt he couldn't escape on some other vampire thriving to be like his evil alter ego.

Angel's mind drifted to Angelus' deeds, his senses no longer alert. He distantly heard leaves ruffling, but wasn't sure if the noise was from the wind, or from someone or something else. Angel continued to walk, eyes on the ground, senses a blur, mind on Angelus' crimes, caught off guard when his body collided into a warm, smaller frame. The two stumbled away from each other, both ready for the fight.

"Angel."

"Buffy." The two spoke in unison. She hid the stake behind her back. He frowned. "You don't have to hide it Buffy."

"Sorry. With Angelus running around for the past few months, it kind of became habit."

"I know. You don't have to explain." He started to walk away, she walked with him.

"So, um, what have you been up to?" Angel smirked. They were never good with small talk.

"Not much. Trying to come to terms with everything." Buffy nodded as though she understood. The two continued to walk, neither sure what to say. "No new big bads to deal with?" He asked, his voice shocking her after the silence.

"Oh! Yeah!" She said, happy the conversation was brought to business, something that was easier for them to discuss. "Our school has a ghost."

"Huh?"

"Yeah. It's sad. This poor teacher was murdered by the psycho student she had an affair with, and then the guy killed himself in the music room. We're going to perform an exorcism tonight."

"Giles is going to perform an exorcism?"

"No. Um, he, he doesn't know about what we're doing or about the student-teacher affair theory. Willow's doing the exorcism. He, uh, he thinks the ghost is Jenny." Buffy didn't like bringing Jenny's name up in front of Angel.

"Oh." He said. A flood of new memories washed over him. "Um...tell, tell Willow to be careful."

"Are you okay?" He blinked. "Angel?"

"It's hard to deal with everything I did. Everyday I remember something new and the pain...it's just so hard." Buffy fidgeted. She didn't know what to say. She knew he felt guilty for everything Angelus did. She knew because she felt guilty too. It was her fault he turned into Angelus and though she didn't feel the guilt as strongly as Angel did, she still felt it. She reached out and grabbed his hand, looking to comfort both him and herself. He lightly held hers back.

"Angel, I know things have been tense between all of us since you got your soul back, but I promise you everyone's starting to trust you again and-" his snort of amusement stopped her mid-sentence.

"Buffy, I don't give a damn if your friends trust me or not." Her hand fell from his. The slayer was taken aback, as was Angel himself. He didn't expect to lash out at her like that. She blinked a few times then continued.

"I, I just want you to know I'm always here for you if you want to talk, okay?"

"Okay." He said, though he knew these were the type of things he could never discuss with her. Better to dismiss the conversation than draw himself into an argument he didn't have the energy to deal with.

"I also want you to know that..." she trailed off, waiting until he looked at her. "I still love you Angel." He tensed. "I never stopped." There was a long pause.

"I know," he spoke quietly.

"I want us to try to get back where we were." Angel continued to look at her, not sure what to say. There was no chance they'd get back to where they were.

"You should go. Willow's probably waiting." Several seconds of silence passed as he managed to stun her yet again.

"Yeah," she said, frowning. She went to place a kiss on his lips. He allowed it. "I love you Angel," she said, walking away.

"I love you too Buffy," he whispered as he watched her walk away. She smiled softly, disappearing. "But not like I used to."

The startled group retired to Buffy's living room. Xander, Giles, Willow and Cordelia sat around the room, while Buffy herself leaned up against the wall. Her mind was moving rapidly from the events experienced with James' spirit, to the way Angel reacted to her presence and the pain they were both suffering through.

"The good news is that none of you girls were shot." Giles said. Everyone nodded slowly in agreement. "We've established, based on all the parallels and Buffy's visions, that it's James' spirit."

"So what do we do about James?" Willow asked.

"He's obviously reliving the night of the Sadie Hawkins Dance when he killed Ms. Newman. It's common enough for a spirit to do this, to recreate a tragedy."

"Hey," Cordelia spoke. "If Sunnydale High School shuts down forever, do we automatically graduate?"

"But why?" Xander asked, ignoring Cordelia. She glared at him. "What does he want?" He reconsidered Cordelia's statement. "Actually, that's an interesting point."

"He's trying to...resolve whatever issues are keeping him in limbo." Giles said. "W-what exactly those are, I'm not-"

"He wants forgiveness." Buffy interrupted.

"Yes. I imagine he does. But when James possesses people, they act out exactly what happened that night. So, he's experiencing a form of purgatory instead. I mean, he's, he's doomed to, to kill his Ms. Newman over and over and over again, and...forgiveness is impossible."

"Good. He doesn't deserve it."

"To forgive is an act of compassion, Buffy. It's, it's not done because people deserve it. It's done because they need it."

"No. James destroyed the one person he loved the most in a moment of blind passion. That's not something you forgive. No matter why he did what he did, and no matter if he knows now that it was wrong and selfish and stupid, it is just something he's gonna have to live with."

"He can't live with it, Buff." Xander said. "He's dead." Buffy looked back at the group, not sure what to say. She wanted to get out of the room, away from the staring eyes.

"Okay. Over identify much?" Cordelia asked. "We get it. You turned your boyfriend into a homicidal evil version of his original self. You feel guilty. Blah, blah, blah. We know the story. But he's not evil anymore so deal with it and quit making something unrelated about you. If forgiveness gets this guy to quit possessing and killing more innocent people, I say we help give him what he wants." Now the group was staring at Cordelia, none of them pleased with her outburst, but all knowing she was right. "Pfft. Whatever." She said, not caring if the group was angry with her.

She stood and went to the kitchen, hands smoothing down her expensive denim skirt. She didn't know why she put up with the patrolling, the researching and the attacks from ghosts, vampires and demons. She should be out with her friends, planning for the Sadie Hawkins dance tomorrow, or at the Bronze.

"Right," she mumbled angrily. Those friends had been tossed out when she accepted Xander and his friends in all their loser glory, and that dance went flying out the window when the wasps surrounded the school. Cordelia looked around the kitchen, not even sure why she had chosen to come in here instead of just leave the Summers' home.

She buried her hands in her pockets, a bewildered look marring her pretty face as she pulled out a folded sheet of paper. She unfolded it, startled to realize it was a Class of '55 Sadie Hawkins Dance flyer. She put down the flyer and heard a faint male voice.

"I need you." Cordelia's brow kneaded together. She walked out the kitchen door.

Chapter Two

Wasps surrounded Sunnydale High, swallowing the school. The loud buzz of the wasps echoed through the quiet, chilly night. Cordelia stood in front of the school, clutching her light sweater tighter to her body.

She walked up to the entrance and stood before the double doors. The swarm parted, letting her pass. The doors opened. She walked through them and the swarm closed the gap behind her.

Xander walked into the kitchen, searching for his girlfriend.

"Cordy?" he scanned the room. "Cordelia?" Xander's eyes fell upon the flyer lying on the island and he picked it up.

"Oh God!" he ran into the living room. "She's gone! She went back!"

The Scoobies stood in front of the school, looking at the swarm of wasps surrounding it.

"So what now?" Xander asked nervously.

"I don't get it. Is Cordelia trying to play the hero here, or something? She's just going to get herself hurt, or worse, killed." Xander fidgeted at Buffy's words.

"I believe she's under the spirit's thrall. He's, he's calling her," Giles said.

"But why?" Buffy didn't understand it. The ghost had been sending her visions since this all began. Granted, she didn't want to get shot, but that should be her in there, not Cordelia.

"James needs her to re-enact everything that happened on the night that he killed Ms. Newman. He wants to change things, make, make a happy ending."

"But it can't happen! It always ends the same, which means Cordelia just went in there to get shot, Giles!" Xander was panicking; the thought of Cordelia in an inevitably fatal situation was getting to him.

"The school's deserted. There's no way for James to play his part. There's no man inside for him to possess." Giles said, trying to comfort Xander.

"So she should be safe until we get her out."

"In theory, yeah." Willow said, then sent an apologetic frown Xander's way.

"But why her?" Buffy asked, frustrated her question had yet to be answered.

"I don't know Buffy. Maybe James felt some strange connection to Cordelia. I don't know why, but he must have if he drew her here. Stranger things have happened."

Cordelia walked idly through the school's halls. She stopped by the trophy case and turned around.

"Cordelia? What are you doing here?" Angel asked. He didn't really know why he was in the Sunnydale halls, but something had pulled him here and he followed his instincts. Why Cordelia was here though was beyond him. Maybe he was here to get her out. But she wasn't responding to his question. He suddenly felt very nervous. "Cordelia?"

"You're the only one," she whispered.

"What?"

"The only person I can talk to." Angel was baffled, but shook his confusion off. The sinking feeling in his gut was getting stronger.

"Cordelia, we need to get out of here. Now." Cordelia turned to face him.

"You can't make me disappear just because you say it's over." Angel ignored his bewilderment.

"Actually..." he said, approaching her, ready to grab the teenager by the arm and get them both the hell out of there. He could feel something within him rising to the surface and knew he couldn't control it. They needed to get out of there. "I can. In fact..." his hand wrapped around her arm. "I just want you to have some sort of normal life. We can never have that, don't you see?"

"I don't give a damn about a normal life! I'm going crazy not seeing you. I think about you every minute." Angel raised his hand to her cheek.

1955

Grace put her hand on James' cheek. He looked down sadly.

"I know." Grace Newman whispered. "But it's over. It has to be." She turned around and started to leave. James looks up again and starts to chase after her.

1998

Cordelia chased Angel.

"Come back here!" Cordelia yelled angrily. "We're not finished!" she grabbed his arm and made him face her. "You don't care anymore. Is that it?"

"It doesn't matter," Angel spoke, sobbing. "It doesn't matter what I feel."

"Then tell me you don't love me!"

1955

"Say it!" James screamed.

"Is that what you need to hear?" Grace asked. "Will that help? I don't."

1998

"I don't. Now let me go." Angel said, trying to leave.

"No!" Cordelia yelled. "A person doesn't just wake up and stop loving somebody!"

1955

Grace looks at James. He takes a step back, raises a revolver, pulls the hammer back and aims it at her.

1998

Angel looks at the gun and then at Cordelia, frightened.

"Love is forever," she said. "I'm not afraid to use it, I swear! If I can't be with you..."

"Oh, my God." Angel turns around and starts running out of the hall toward the balcony.

1955

Grace runs from the hall. James yells,

"Don't walk away from me..."

1998

"..bitch!" Cordelia yells. Angel runs out of the hall. She runs after him.

1955

James runs after Grace.

1998

Angel barged through the door out onto the balcony.

"Stop it!" Cordelia comes out the door. "Stop it! Don't make me!" he stops next to the balcony railing.

"All right," Angel said breathing heavily, turning around. "Just..."

1955

Grace turns around to face James.

"You know you don't want to do this," Grace said. "Let's both...just calm down. Now give me the gun," she held out her hand.

"Don't," James said. "Don't do that, damn it!"

1998

"Don't talk to me like I'm some stupid..." Cordelia pulled the trigger and the gun goes off. Angel flinches from the wound.

Outside the school, the Scoobies hear the gunshot. Xander draws in a worried breath.

On the balcony, Angel's hand is clutched to his stomach. He pulls it away and sees the blood. His eyes meet Cordelia's. She stares back at him in open-mouthed shock at what she just did.

"James." Angel gasped.

1955

Grace goes into shock from the bullet wound and begins to fall backward. She tumbles over the balcony railing down to the base of the stairs below.

1998

Cordelia stares down at Angel in shock

1955

James sees Grace below, lying dead with her eyes closed. He slowly goes back into the hall.

1998

Angel lies prone at the base of the stairs below.

Cordelia slowly enters the music room.

Angel's eyes snap open. He props himself up on his elbows and looks up at the balcony.

In the music room, Cordelia walked to the record player at the back of the room. She turns it on and the record begins playing.

[I]My love must be a kind of blind love.[/I]

Cordelia looks over into the mirror, and James looks back at her. Her eyes are full of tears as she looks at him. He looks down at the gun in his hand.

[I]I can't see anyone but you.[/I]

Cordelia looks down at the gun, crying. She raises it slowly, but a hand takes it and pushes it back down. Cordelia turns around and finds herself face to face with Angel.

"Grace." Cordelia gasped.

"Don't do this."

"But-but I killed you."

"It was an accident. It wasn't your fault."

"It is my fault. How could I..."

"Shhh, I'm the one who should be sorry, James. You thought I stopped loving you. But I never did. I loved you with my last breath." A few sobs escaped Cordelia's lips. "Shhh...no more tears."

1955

Grace leans forward and kisses James.

1998

Angel leans forward and kisses Cordelia. Time progressed as the two held each other tight, their lips moving sweetly together.

Above Cordelia and Angel, in the ceiling, a bright light appears, and the spirits of Grace and James leave this world. As quickly as it appeared, the light is gone. Angel and Cordelia gently break off their kiss and open their eyes.

"Angel?" Cordelia questioned quietly. Angel snarled, his face changing. Cordelia let out a scream as the vampire grabbed her, pushing her up against the nearest wall. She braced herself for the attack and pain to come.

Cordelia's eyes shot open when Angel pressed his lips roughly to hers. Her hands on his shoulders, originally pushing, were now grasping onto him tightly, bringing him closer, giving herself to the feeling of his body surrounding her.

Angel's arm wrapped around Cordelia, picking her up, her legs wrapping around his body. He placed her on the standing piano, tearing her sweater from her body, tossing it to the floor. His hands traveled to her tank top and ripped.

"Angel! What are-" he covered her lips with his. A warning alarm went off in her mind, but was drowned out as Angel's lips descended, taking a newly uncovered breast into his mouth.

Cordelia's body was on fire. Her heart was beating rapidly from not much more than his lips. Angel was lost in the rhythm of her heart beat. His instincts were screaming for him to take what he wanted, and the rational side of his brain had long since shut off.

Angel's hands moved to Cordelia's hips, pushing her skirt up. Cordelia froze when she felt him rip her panties.

"Angel, wait, we have to stop," again he silenced her with a kiss, one hand moving between her thighs. She let out a soft moan of pleasure, hands moving to his shirt, ripping it open. Her hands moved over his cool skin, igniting a fire, pulling his body up against hers.

A groan of protest left Cordelia's lips as Angel's fingers left her. He grabbed her hips and knelt just where he wanted to be. Cordelia's eyes widened and her heart skipped as she caught a glimpse of Angel's erection before he entered her in one thrust, pushing past her inner barrier, elicting a cry of pain from the now stiff teenager in his arms.

Angel's mind had stopped forming coherent thoughts. Something deep inside him stirred and he couldn't control it if he wanted to.

"Angel, Angel please, we can't. We need to...stop...Angel, Angel...ahhh..." a small whimper escaped her lips as the discomfort passed, replaced by a new feeling of pleasure. The volume of the warning signal in her mind was lessening. She felt him withdraw and plunge in again and again, steadily building up a rhythm.

Despite her protests, she could feel Angel inside her, stretching her. She felt her arousal start to build as he steadily pumped inside her. She closed her eyes.

"Look at me," he growled. She opened her eyes and faced him, unable to hide the lust reflecting in her hazel orbs. He smirked and she saw the same thing in his amber gaze, smirking for a second too, until she felt her body start to tighten.

This was crazy. Him, her, they didn't do this, they shouldn't be doing this. Yet, here they both were. He kept thrusting, faster and faster. She felt her pleasure building up, felt herself getting close.

Angel growled, his fangs piercing her neck as he plunged hard and deep, letting go inside her. Cordelia let out a cry of pain as he bit. Then the pain dulled, replaced by a pleasure that made her gasp as her orgasm began to build.

The feeling ended too quickly though. He thrust three or four times, slowing down and finally stopping.

For a moment he was frozen, still lodged inside her. He pulled out and climbed off of her, chest rising and falling with unneeded air.

Cordelia didn't want to look at him. He left her body and she immediately closed her legs, sitting up straight, pulling her skirt down, eyes cast downward.

Angel's mind was slowing down. Everything since he met up with Cordelia was a blur. He looked at the young woman. She refused to meet his gaze. He took in a deep breath, pulling and zipping up his pants.

Cordelia finally looked at Angel, and wished she hadn't. He looked back at her, guilt, regret and confusion in his dark eyes. She lowered her head. She felt cheap, used and angry. She needed to get away from him.

"Cordelia, I'm sorry, I don't know what-"

"Angel, please don't," she said, voice cracking. She didn't want to hear his apologies or excuses. She wanted him as far away from her as possible.

"Here, let me help-" he tried to grab her hand and help her down. She pushed him away and hopped off herself, stumbling on unsteady legs. He caught her before she fell and again she pushed away from him, staggering backwards against the wall. "Cordelia."

"Angel, just, go." Angel was taken aback.

"Cordelia."

"Angel, please, just go."

"But..."

"Go! I don't want to see you, I don't want to talk to you or hear your excuses or your apologies; I just want you to leave me alone. Now please, go," she begged, her eyes pleading with him to just do as she asked. Angel didn't want to leave her, but she didn't want him here. He nodded, picked up his shirt and left.

Cordelia watched him go, his head hung, shoulders slumped. She took in a few deep breaths, trying to hold back the tears. She grabbed her sweater and pulled it on, bringing her knees up to her chest and hugging them to her body. She rocked back and forth slowly, willing herself not to cry.

"Cordelia! Cordy!" Cordelia's head turned and she saw Xander run in, the rest of the Scoobies behind him. "Oh thank God, Cordelia, you're alive," he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her. She closed her eyes, still fighting the tears.

"Are you all right Cordy?" Willow asked, concerned. Everyone stared at her, waiting for her answer. She saw the look in Giles face, full of curiosity. She could see the questions burning in his eyes, waiting for the knowledge she would provide him with. She turned away from him. Xander was hugging her, but she could barely feel his touch.

"Cordy? Are you okay?" She looked into his eyes. She took in a shaky breath, choking on it. The tears fell down her face as she finally began to cry, pulling herself out of Xander's embrace. Xander knelt before her, sending a concerned look to his friends. He saw the same look mirrored on their faces as Cordelia continued to cry.

Angel walked into his dark room, his handsome face already set in brood mode. He felt somewhat dizzy. Tonight's events were coming back to him, replaying in his mind. His demon had taken control and Cordelia had been in its path.

Angel wasn't sure how he had lost control. It didn't matter now though, it had happened. He took in a deep breath, forehead leaning against his bedroom wall. He shoved his hands in his pant pockets, stunned to feel unfamiliar fabric against his fingertips. [I]Silk[/I]. Angel laid down, sinking into his bed as he pulled out the torn thong he had ripped off Cordelia's body.

He laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling, letting the darkness and remorse consume him.