Author's Note: Hey guys, turns out I'm not dead. If you want a long, rambling story of what happened, check out my bio. But if not, know that life hasn't been kind to me lately. Anyway, this is probably not what anyone was expecting but I've fallen for R18. And they don't have near enough love. Just know right now that this isn't 1827, I'm not trying to trick anyone. I'm trying to get used to the new system but I know you can tag like 4 characters. This was just for humor sake, I'm trying to get back into writing. If you're waiting for one of my other stories and don't like R18 or 6927, then I wouldn't read this.
Pairings: Adult!Reborn x Hibari Kyoya (I've confused myself and spelled his name this way), Rokudo Mukuro x Sawada Tsunayoshi
Hibari awoke to a loud slam of the apartment door and sounds of quick stomping that was nearing Reborn's room. He groaned lowly, prying his tired eyes open and shifting in the strong arms locked around his waist. He heard the man behind him sigh before a sloppy kiss was pressed against his exposed nape then he was released from the warmth surrounding him. Hibari mourned the loss for a moment before the cause of their awakening burst through the bedroom door.
"Reborn - " The rant died on the boy's tongue as he looked at the two sleep ruffled males in surprise. "Oh I'm sorry, I didn't know Hibari-san was here..." He trailed off, looking altogether embarrassed and sheepish. At least he looked apologetic for disturbing their peaceful slumber.
Reborn finished sitting up, waving him off as he reached over and grabbed a cigarette, the light from the lighter briefly illuminating his face. Hibari glanced out the window to see the beginnings of sunshine peeking through. It was morning already? It felt like they'd just fallen asleep. He rubbed his eyes, moving his legs off his side of the bed while Reborn asked Tsuna what was wrong.
Forgetting the fact that he'd been embarrassed a moment ago, the brunet leapt into a full fledge rant about his boyfriend Mukuro. Apparently Tsuna caught Mukuro talking to a girl that he'd dated before and promised Tsuna he wouldn't talk to anymore. When the brunet confronted him about it, the blue haired male had denied it and accused Tsuna of flirting with Hibari of all people. Reborn frowned at that, as if he'd ever let that happen. He was well aware that Hibari and Tsuna had a brief history before Reborn had met him but they'd parted as good friends and Tsuna even introduced the two.
"He's so infuriating! I wish he would just admit what he did wrong and stop trying to turn the blame on me." Tsuna huffed angrily. As he spoke, Hibari had stood and headed into the bathroom to gather up his regular clothes Reborn had shed the night earlier. Thankfully when they were done with their activities, Hibari had quickly showered and dressed in some borrowed night clothes. Reborn had merely thrown on some night pants. Hibari re-emerged while Tsuna and Reborn talked, walking over to the night table to grab his phone. He had five missed calls, all from Mukuro. He sighed.
"He call you?" Reborn asked, catching the look on his lover's face. Hibari nodded tiredly, putting his phone in his pocket and grabbing his keys and wallet.
"He's probably at my apartment. I'll talk to him." He informed, walking over and kissing Reborn on the lips despite Tsuna being in the room. The brunet looked at their display of affection longingly and Reborn nearly rolled his eyes at his ex-student's romantic streak. He murmured a goodbye against Hibari's lips before the other left the room and apartment. He listened to his front door shut before he sighed and looked at his student.
"Really you two are more trouble than you're worth." He snorted, exhaling smoke from his lungs. Surprisingly he and Hibari's relationship had remained the steadiest despite everyone's predication of Tsuna and Mukuro's being the best. They hardly argued which was interesting considering both of their personalities but he supposed he had Hibari to thank for that. Over the course of the relationship the man had settled down and learned to work around Reborn when he was in a mood. Basically if either of them were grumpy they tended to avoid one another in fear of a fight. It was a system that worked quite well. Mukuro and Tsuna tended to face each other head on over every little thing which he and Hibari only did if their problem lied with one another, which was extremely rare.
Tsuna plopped heavily onto the bed, putting his face in his hands. "I'm trying but he can be so difficult sometimes I just don't know what to do anymore."
"Go to couple's counseling." He suggested jokingly, putting his cigarette out in the ashtray.
The brunet blinked before brightening. "That's brilliant! Why hadn't I thought of that before? Thanks Reborn!" He said in a rush, quickly standing and pulling out his phone.
Reborn blinked and watched him go. "I was kidding." He muttered before sighing and sinking back into bed, mourning the loss of warmth from Hibari. Really those two needed to fix their issues and leave them alone.
Hibari opened the door to his apartment, not surprised to find it unlocked. He should have never given his second spare key to Mukuro. He walked in, sighing and tossing his keys and wallet onto the kitchen counter carelessly before glancing into the living room. There sat Mukuro in front of his large TV, wrapped up in wads of blankets and a tub of ice cream in his lap as he watched The Notebook. Why Hibari even had that movie he didn't know but he had a sinking suspicion that it was because of the man currently making himself comfortable on his couch.
He put his arms on his hips and sighed, staring at the scene for a few moments before an idea struck him. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, quickly opening the camera and taking a quick picture at the scene. He grinned evilly before putting it away for future blackmail and walking over, plopping down next to the blue haired male. Mukuro glanced at him before shoving a large spoonful of ice cream in his mouth.
Hibari wrinkled his nose. If Mukuro didn't finish that then he was definitely throwing it out.
"I messed up." Mukuro informed after swallowing before immediately shoving another spoonful in his mouth. Hibari sighed and reached over to grab the remote, turning the volume down. He glanced back at his friend to see him eating spoonfuls at an alarming rate.
"You're going to get fat if this keeps happening." He informed bluntly, leaning back on his couch. He stared at the TV screen for a moment, watching as the man and woman kissed each other romantically in the rain. What a cliché. He and Reborn had made out in the rain before. It wasn't that interesting. He shook his head of the thought and turned back to the silent male only to find him staring into the tub of ice cream with wide eyes.
After a moment, he shoved the tub away. Hibari's eyes widened as he jumped forward to try and prevent the ice cream from getting all over his table and floor. He quickly picked it up, turning to yell at Mukuro. "Are you crazy?" He snapped, glaring at the man who had flopped over to his side and buried his head under the blankets.
"Oh God Tsuna doesn't want me because I'm fat!" He wailed before sobbing and shaking under the covers.
Dear God what the hell was wrong with the world? Had he done something to deserve this? He rubbed his forehead tiredly. He would have chose to stay in Reborn's bed over this any day. Crossing his arms he contemplated on what to do next as Mukuro continued to spout stupid nonsense. A quiet buzzing broke him from his thoughts and he looked down behind him to see Mukuro's phone light up on the table. He frowned and picked it up, seeing Tsuna's name (along with a stupid heart) flash across the screen.
Suddenly a hand snatched the phone from his grip and he stared at his empty hand before blinking and looking at Mukuro. The blue haired male bit his lip as he stared at the screen uncertainly. Hibari scowled in annoyance and snatched the phone back, quickly answering it before Mukuro could protest. "He's right here." He informed the brunet, shoving Mukuro's face away when he tried to grab the phone. "He was sitting on my couch and eating ice cream while watching The Notebook." He informed, frowning and immediately sitting on his friend when the other tried to lunge off the couch.
Mukuro grunted, trying to shove him off. "God you're heavy!" He wheezed, struggling beneath his weight. Hibari shoved his face into the cushions, continuing to listen to Tsuna talk.
"Reborn suggested that?" He asked after a moment, sounding uncertain. It wasn't like Reborn to suggest something like couple's counseling. The man had declared that such a thing was bull when they watched a movie one day. He believed that problems could be solved without bringing other people into it. But that was pretty much the opposite of what they were doing wasn't it?
Mukuro struggled with renewed vigor and Hibari realized that he probably couldn't breathe. He released the other's head and he gasped loudly. Hibari rolled his eyes. What a baby. "Well if it's what you want I'll make Mukuro agree." He drawled, glaring at the man when he went to protest. "Yeah I'll tell him." He paused. "Alright bye."
Mukuro scowled at him and crossed his arms with a pout but took his phone when Hibari handed it to him. "What did he say?" He asked after a moment. Did he forgive him? He hoped so. He hated fighting with the brunet but they seemed to be doing it more often the naught anymore.
"Well apparently he believes that you two would benefit from couple's counseling." The black haired male informed as he stood, grabbing the tub of ice cream and taking it into the kitchen. He set it on the counter, reminding himself not to forget about it later as he looked back at Mukuro.
The man stared at him with wide eyes as he followed him into the kitchen, blankets trailing behind him. He reminded Hibari of a walking cocoon. "Are you serious? That will never work! If we can't solve our problems how is someone else going to do it?!" He wailed, sitting down at the island and hitting his face against the counter surface, wincing as he did so.
Hibari rolled his eyes. "You're an idiot."
Really how did it come to this? Hibari wondered as he sat, covering his face with his hand as he sat next to an equally bewildered Reborn on the loveseat. Mukuro and Tsuna sat across from them, sitting on opposite ends of the couch stubbornly. The former had his arms crossed, staring at the wall with an unhappy pout on his face while the latter was shifting nervously, glancing around at the three of them.
"So let me get this straight." Reborn drawled, "Because you couldn't afford a real counselor, you decided that Hibari and I were the next best thing." Hibari released an exasperated sigh, turning his head to glance at the two on the couch, the current sources of his misery. Well at least Reborn was here to suffer with him and make the experience a little less terrible. If things got bad he could just stare at the older man. That always made him feel better.
Tsuna smiled nervously, rubbing his sweaty palms against his legs. "Ah yeah." He agreed weakly, frowning when Mukuro snorted. He looked at his lover, scowling a bit. "You certainly didn't contribute." He snapped at the other, mimicking his position and crossing his arms. "At least I'm trying to save our relationship. All you did was eat a tub of ice cream and watch The Notebook which, by the way, was a terrible movie."
Mukuro sputtered in shock, rounding on the brunet. "What? The Notebook is an amazing movie!" He retorted. Hibari wanted to bang his head against the wall. He wasn't even getting paid for this. Reborn merely opened his pack of cigarettes, looking inside and frowning in disappointment. He didn't have enough to get him through this ordeal. He should have bought more.
As if sensing his thoughts, Hibari sighed and reached into his pocket, pulling out a brand new pack and handing it to his lover. He didn't know why he'd gotten him another pack, he certainly didn't encourage his bad habit. But he knew that to keep Reborn from murdering everyone in the room, himself included, he was going to need all the cigarettes he could get. Reborn thanked him and plucked the pack from his fingers before he could change his mind and take them back.
Their exchange went unnoticed to the two on the couch, who were still arguing about the movie.
"It's boring. A whole three hours of two people getting together and breaking up! And the ending isn't even good! They're all old and she completely forgot him!" Tsuna was yelling, making exaggerated gestures with his hand as he angled his body toward Mukuro.
Mukuro looked as if Tsuna had just insulted his mother. "For your information, it's two hours of a couple's beautiful love story."
The brunet gave him a deadpan look. "It's boring. She sleeps with him while she's engaged to another man for crying out loud!"
And on it went, Tsuna insulting Mukuro's favorite movie while the other defended it. Reborn quickly lit a cigarette, leaning back into the couch and watching the two with a bored look on his face. Hibari rested his head in his hand as he stared at them. He could feel a headache approaching fast.
"Spiderman had a better love story than that movie." Tsuna snapped, glaring at his lover. Really how did one go from The Notebook to Spiderman? Hibari would never know how either of their minds worked. He briefly wondered how on Earth he and Tsuna even had a relationship. Sure it was brief but it had worked for a short amount of time.
"Oh please that upside down kiss was stupid. And Mary Jane is so annoying."
"The upside down kiss was better than just kissing in the rain!"
"At least The Notebook had Ryan Gosling in it." Hibari blinked. Where had that come from? That probably wasn't the best thing to say on Mukuro's part. That much was obvious when Tsuna had sputtered in anger and surprise, reaching over to smack the blue haired male across the face. Reborn raised an eyebrow, inhaling the noxious smoke from his cancer stick before exhaling. Rinse and repeat. He didn't need Aspirin, he had cigarettes. He couldn't say the same for his lover though. Hibari looked close to murdering someone.
"Don't you talk about another man to my face!" Tsuna shrieked.
Mukuro looked shocked, holding his stinging cheek tenderly before glaring at the brunet. "You're so jealous!" He snapped.
"Of course I'm jealous! You were talking to her, after you told me that you wouldn't, and then lied about it!" Ah so they were finally getting to the root of the problem were they? And he and Reborn hadn't even said a word. "And then you try to accuse me of flirting with Hibari, which Reborn would murder me if I ever did by the way."
Reborn grunted in agreement as he lit another cigarette.
"She was asking me how we were doing you idiot!" Mukuro defended immediately.
"Well why didn't you just say that instead of trying to turn things around on me!?"
"Because you wouldn't have believed me! And I saw you acting chummy with Kyoya, you were laughing and blushing!" The blue haired male shot back with a glare, pointing at Hibari, who blinked when his name was brought into the conversation. He saw Reborn turn his head to look at him and he frowned. Oh no no no, they were not going to get Reborn and he into an argument!
"When?" He snapped in irritation, trying to save his own skin. He could see Reborn's eyes narrowing as he extinguished his cigarette.
"Last week! You were both standing outside the bookstore and talking."
Both Hibari and Tsuna blinked before he groaned, smacking his face in annoyance. "He was talking about you, idiot." He felt his lover relax next to him and light another cigarette. Really the man was turning into a damn choo-choo train. "He wanted to know what kind of books you liked so I met up with him and showed him."
Mukuro frowned, still looking skeptical. "Then why were you blushing?" He questioned, staring into brown eyes seriously. Hibari was tempted to snatch a cigarette from Reborn for himself. Unfortunately for him the man would bite his hand off before he let him get anywhere near his pack of cancer sticks.
Tsuna blushed, staring down at his lap. "Because the books you like are embarrassing."
Reborn raised his eyebrows at that bit of information, glancing at Hibari. He merely shook his head. He wasn't about to get into what kinds of books Mukuro liked or how he even knew. That was a topic best left alone. For everyone's benefit.
The two on the couch were silent for a moment, drawing both Reborn and Hibari's attention back to them. They were facing each other, looking into each other's eyes intently as if having a conversation. Finally Mukuro sighed, slouching in defeat. "I'm sorry. I should have explained myself."
Tsuna's eyes softened and he reached forward to gently touch Mukuro's cheek that he'd slapped. The skin was an angry red. "Me too. I shouldn't have assumed things. And I shouldn't have hit you."
Hibari relaxed, standing and getting ready to leave the room. Reborn extinguished his cigarette, getting ready to follow his lead.
"But," The black haired male mentally groaned, closing his eyes in despair as Tsuna continued. "I won't apologize for insulting The Notebook." Defeated, Hibari flopped back down next to Reborn, who merely lit another cigarette.
A/N: Oh yes I went there. Don't expect this one to get too much attention, R18 isn't the most popular pairing out there after all. But for those few out there that read this: Woo!