Ok you all know that every story I write is gonna be OOC so I'm not even gonna bother from now on. From here on, just assume every story I post is gonna be OOC; it saves me writing at the beginning of every story.

So, I know demons and the like exist, but I didn't know people like me existed. The whole 'full moon' crap got old quickly - of course the night I have to attend a large ball (that I really don't want to go to) would be a full moon.

For clarification: yes, I finally managed to become human (as human as I can get any more...) again, thanks to a few of Sebastian's connections, but now there is a terrible side effect.

Every full moon, I become a cat. Not a were-cat, or anything like that, of course. Just an ordinary cat.

The moon is already high in the sky, and I have already changed form, so now I sit on my fiancée's lap and scowl out the window in frustration. She is taking my place at the ball
tonight, which I think is the worst idea ever imagined, but I was overruled by both her parents and that god-forsaken (heh) demon.

The coach door is opened before I know it and I am gathered in Elizabeth's arms and carried out the carriage; I can smell alcohol from here. I see a grey flash, but before I can figure out what it was, we are inside the massive mansion and I am being fawned over by posh ladies with long blonde hair and glassy eyes and airy voices and long nails and-

"Your cat is so cute!" One of the women croons, stroking my fur with a pink-nailed hand.

"He's so fluffy!" Another breathes, petting my head with her black-gloved hand.

"Oh...but he is missing an eye?" Yet another lady approaches me and glides her (fucking clawed!) fingers over the silk eye patch in a way that made me want to do grotesque and harmful things to her, "The poor dear! I'm amazed that he looks so healthy and silky! You truly are a good pet owner, my Lady!" The last part is addressed to Elizabeth, who blushes modestly and says that she was embarrassed now, and that it was nothing, really, he's such an easy cat to look after, to be honest!~

You didn't even raise me... I glower at her, Stop acting like you own me. God...

"SO CUTE-!" the last lady - barely older than 15, I think - takes me from Elizabeth and clutches me close to her; I whine and the only thing stopping me from clawing her to pieces is propriety. And the fact that Sebastian is looming over me like a black cloud. I struggle and manage to break free and I bolt to the other side of the house - if those two want me they can find me! It's their fault this happened, so I'll be extra difficult just for them~.

I eventually make my way up to the last floor of this massive house and I sit in the furthest room away from the stairs, perched on the windowsill. Sebastian would kill me if he saw me on a place like this, but I honestly ran out of fucks to give years ago.

"I thought it was you~!" A voice comes from behind and I almost fall off the windowsill in shock, "You became a cat again...the rumours were true after all!~"

"What!?" I spit, glowering at the grinning former-Shinigami, "What rumours!?"

"You don't know!?" Undertaker takes a seat next to me, "Several people I'm acquainted with find it suspicious that a grey-blue cat with an eye patch on its eyes wanders around the place every month or so! Also, someone tipped me off." He squints at me, "Also...that person wonders about the, ahem, relationship between you and that demon-!~"

"What?" I scratch him, "The fuck did you just say!? And who would dare question something like that-!?"

"A certain red headed friend of yours-~"

"Fuck." I scratch Undertaker again – hard – and ignore his whimper of pain, "That little bitch; how could he!? And why does he care about my relationship with that bastard!?"

"Doesn't he have an everlasting unrequited love-thing with him!?~" Undertaker's grin widens, "Quite a few posh people question your relationship with him, actually. Mostly those acquaintances I mentioned previously, but anyway." He pauses thoughtfully, " I see why they do, to be honest!~ That tall person never leaves your side, and you seem to let him pet you without much of a struggle, and the way he looks at me sometimes is quite scary, especially when I have to give you your medicine~!"

I hiss at him.

"I should mention this as well. Your pretty little fiancée is questioning the relationship as well!~ She came to me all quiet-like and-"

"She what!?"

"- and asked my opinion on the relationship between you and Sebastian.~"

"Why would she-?" I shake my head, "I should know by now not to question her reasoning. I hope you answered decently..."

"Well, I said that I thought you two were fuck buddies but-~"

"What the fuck, bastard! That's hardly decent!" I scratch him again, but I don't deny it. Mainly because it's true and that I don't want to be caught lying by that sad excuse for a death god.

"Well, you're not denying it, so am I right!?" He sounds way too interested, "Are you fucking each other!? I mean, it would help settle 500 or so bets with other people if you answer this question-~"

"Excuse me!? You have bets on whether me and my demon butler are fucking each other!?"

"Oh yes! Although everyone I asked thinks he's, ah, taking advantage of you on a daily basis..."

"Why-!? Those people you know are fucking disgusting!"

"I know!~" He pets me, " I am determined to prove them wrong, however!~ So, tell me!~ Are you fucking each other?"

"There is no way I am answering that!" I snarl, turning away, burning with embarrassment under my fur, "But, I will tell you this - he is not 'taking advantage' of me! Those people you are associated with are sick fucks!" I sniff, "Seriously, the people you associate with-."

"Thank you!~" he pulls me into an embrace, which I wiggle out of easily, "I can prove them wrong now!~ I owe you, Earl~"

"Whatever," I roll my eyes in exasperation; can he go fuck himself already? "Can you fuck off now?"

He laughs at this, but then he stops laughing abruptly and suddenly says,

"Come with me."

I scoff, "As if-!"

"No, listen!~" I turn to him, deciding to humour him, "Look, I know you – you hate parties (if this can be called that...), so why don't you tag along?~"

I don't respond.

"I'm going to a party myself - it's much more suited to the younger generation. I want to take you, as payment for the service you granted me tonight.~"

I sigh. He really doesn't understand the situation I am in...

"I can't, even if I wanted to," I narrow my eyes, "Sebastian would probably lock me in my own estate if I ever left him, and if I left this place for something as strange as a party..." I shiver, "I don't want to think of the consequences that would bring about."

"Sebastian is tied up tonight, looking after your fiancée, right? Just like you told him to?"

"...I guess."

"So, while he is preoccupied, just slip out.~ Live a little!"

I feel a strange surge of rebellion and all of a sudden that party seems very appealing. I am kept by that damn demon's side all the fucking time and I find myself instantly caring less about how angry he'll get at me.

"...Fine." I am gathered in Undertaker's arms, and he jumps off the windowsill into the night. For a moment, I swear I can feel rage in the bond me and Sebastian share, but it is gone so quickly that I wonder if I just imagined it.

"What-?"

Undertaker has taken us to a small tavern in the more central part of town. There is a large amount of people in the building, and the place reeks of alcohol more than the previous place. I point this out to Undertaker, who merely laughs and sets me on a table and gives me a sweet-smelling plant.

"Eat it!~" he trills, "Go on!~"

That same rebellious surge goes through me and without a second thought I eat the plant and I suddenly feel...different. I suddenly want to play. As in, I want to leaps from the table and just run around and do whatever the fuck I want with no restrictions whatsoever-

"You like it? It's catnip!~" he gives me more and I just feel so different and it's so weird and I find myself nuzzling the grey-haired death god and purring insanely, while he laughs, and he pets my head and I don't even give any shits anymore. Not that I ever did in the first place, but that's beside the point. By now, a small crowd has gathered around the table and everyone is chatting and pointing at me. I smile inwardly.

I love being the centre of attention~.

"How is tonight turning out?~ Any better than it could have been?~"

I mumble a response and stretch out on the wooden table. "Mm..."

Something occurs to me all of a sudden, "...what's the time?"

"I don't know," he shrugs, and I frown at him.

"Well, we've been out for a while now; I know that – just look at the clock!"

He does so and informs me that the time is 4:30 in the morning. This information takes a few seconds to sink into my weary mind, but when it does, any weariness disappears and I feel quite scared all of a sudden. I get to my paws and press against the grey-haired Shinigami, ears flat against my head.

"What's wrong~?" Undertaker looks at me curiously.

"You know that ball I was supposed to be at? Yeah, that one!" I move away from him, "Well, it was supposed to end at 12 this morning – I was supposed to be home at least 4 hours ago! Ohmygod I'm in so much trouble oh my fuck-!"

"...Oh." Undertaker's mouth twists as he thinks, " ...Well, someone's in trouble now!~"

"Excuse me!" I glower at him, "It's your fault I'm here! As if he'll just be pissed at me!"

"Oh, yeah, I forgot. Wait," he pauses, "Can't he track you or something like that?"

"I don't know!" I snap, "He should be able to! Of course, his tracking skills are pathetic, but what can I expect from a pathetic excuse of a demon?"

"Well, can't you do some telepathic shit and mentally talk to him?"

"..Can I?" I actual have no idea if I can – this (motherfucking) Contract keeps us bound together for ages and shit like that, but I have no idea if we can communicate telepathically through it. Oh well, it's worth a try I guess.

I concentrate, and no less than five seconds later, I am graced with a discourteous response,

Where the fuck are you!?

'Excuse you!' I snap back, 'That's a bit rude-!'

Say nothing! What the everlasting fuck do you think you're doing!?

'Well-.'

I have been looking for you for fucking hours and only now do you talk to me! What's worse is that this is the only way I can find you – are you in a tavern!?

'Ah.' I pause awkwardly, 'I might be. What does it matter-?'

If you've been drugged I swear to fuck-!

'Wow can you not?' I would roll my eyes but he can't see the eye movement so there is no point, 'I'm tired and you're just making me feel worse! If you're gonna get here, hurry up so that-!' "Oh no you don't!" I pounce on Undertaker, who had been trying to sneak off, "If I'm gonna get in trouble, you're gonna take some of the blame!" '-just hurry up-!'

Everything goes black.

"Oh, yeah, I ran away.~"

My eyes open at this and only my small amount of self control is stopping me from clawing him to pieces. Well, that and the fact that I have become humane once again.

"You what!?" I shriek, "Are you asking for an early death!?"

"I don't feel like giving you up just yet!~" Undertaker grins and raises a hand – a familiar red thing appears in my vision and before I can move I am glomped and tackled to the ground.

"Ciel~~!" Grell croons, "I'm so glad you're here-!~"

"Get the fuck off!" I shove him off and glare at Undertaker, "Take me back right now-."

"Why? I wanna experiment on you-!"

"You already did like five months ago!" I snort, "Now I'm fucking telling you to-!"

"Oh, calm down!~" Grell pets my head condescendingly, "If you don't fight us, you'll get to go home so much quicker!~"

I have officially run out of any fucks to give. This is just too cliché. It's pissing me off how often this happens, and I decide to end this right now.

"Look, I'm sick of this shit! Stop fucking kidnapping me and all that! It's not funny and the originality of it all has long since departed!" I get up and push past the stunned Shinigami. Grell starts to say something, but I tune him out and stalk away, paying no attention to their protests.

'Get the fuck here.' I pause, and add, 'Please.'

The answer I get doesn't bear repeating.

I am sitting outside, on the grass. Actually, I'm sitting on a blanket on the grass, but details, details.

It's been at least a week since the day I snuck out to that party. I haven't seen any sign of Undertaker or Grell, so I'm assuming they took my rage seriously and decided to stop pestering me. That, or Sebastian found them and growled at them and scared them away. That's probably it, actually.

Speaking of being scared, I experienced true fear when I finally got back home. Sebastian ranted at me for a full hour (I timed him) and most of it consisted of him telling me no never do anything like that again, if I would be so kind!

So, basically, I'm not doing something like that ever again. After that rant, Sebastian was hovering over my shoulder for at least four hours (it's unnerving when someone is watching you write and read over your shoulder, just waiting to say something...) and just ugh. Nope. Never gonna do that again.

I sigh and play with some of the grass; I'm surprised I've been allowed out of the house; for a day I was confined to my room, and then I was only allowed to move between my room and the study, and – actually, to be honest, I snuck out but seeing as there are no pissed off demons in sight I feel as if it's OK for me to do this.

Actually, it's quite warm today, and maybe that's why he's let me out. I guess I should savour the days when I am not a four-legged creature from hell.