Disclaimer: I own nothing except my own crazy ideas.

Pairings: None so far. Not winchest, or at least not yet.

Characters: Sam and Dean

Warnings: cussing, talk of private places,unbetaed

Summary: A very cruel and …creative witch casts a spell on Dean, and "He" has no idea how to reverse it and is going through something only women know the pain of.

Author's note: I swear I don't hate men, I just saw a prompt and got this idea in my head and.. This just had to be written.

Dean felt like he was going to cry. Or maybe laugh hysterically, he wasn't sure which, maybe both. It had been almost three weeks and nothing. This was so completely and utterly wrong, and he couldn't find anything to reverse it.

How did that damn witch come up with something like this anyway? Did she spend every waking hour trying to come up with ways to torment men? What the hell did he do that was so bad as to merit this? …Well, other than the obvious.

Three weeks ago Sam and Dean had been investigating the town of Haskell, Texas, where a string of murders, all men, had taken place. So far, one guy drowned in his bathroom sink while brushing his teeth, another keeled over coughing up his lungs at his job at Wington pharmaceuticals while chatting up Jamie, one of his co-workers, and others. As far as Dean could tell, they were all real douche bags and players, they definitely got a lot of tail.

Jamie was very helpful with the gory details about Chuck's (lung guy's) death. So helpful Dean made sure to get the brunette's number in case she remembered anything else.

The brother's talked to the victim's co-workers, neighbors, friends and family and finally catch the sent of a witch named Astrid.

Dean took a deep breath, willing the memories to leave. Despite what she did he was still a man, he had to remember that. He was just missing- no, don't go there. He let out the air through clenched teeth as he drove into the parking lot of the hotel-of-the-week. After he parked and cut of the engine, he didn't move, just listened to the sounds of the cooling engine. He banged his head against the seat once, twice, and one more time, closing his eyes. He forced himself to calm down before heading to their room.

Sam looked up as Dean walked in, quietly seething. That wasn't good.

"Nothing at the library?" Sam asked, though he already knew the answer.

"No," Dean all but snapped at him. "Nothing, and nothing of Astrid either. Where can she be hiding Sam?" He held out his arms in frustration and started pacing. Again. Sam knew why he was so frustrated, knew he had good reason for it, but it was getting tired watching this.

After the initial shock of what happened to his brother, it was pretty damn hilarious. He was a freaking girl. Dean had teased Sam so much about being a girl, and now Dean was the girl. Of course, he still looked and acted like his brother, except for one little detail.

He teased him, a lot, at first but now Sam was trying to help. And Dean's attitude was getting on Sam's nerves more than usual. The fun was over, this was serious, and needed to end.

Sam shrugged his shoulders and sighed. "We'll find her Dean."

Dean stopped wearing down the carpet and put his hand to his forehead, closing his eyes a moment before looking back to Sam.

"Anything at the university?" He asked, daring to be hopeful.

Sam shook his head. He had gone to a women's university in search for answers but still nothing. "we could call Bo-"

"No!" Dean yelled. Sam watched as Dean regained his composure before sitting down on the bed beside him.

"No, let's not call Bobby, he doesn't need to- need to know any of this."

Sam nodded. "Okay, I understand."

Dean let himself fall back on the bed, his legs hanging off.

Sam picked up the book beside him that he had been looking through when Dean walked in the door, and walked to the desk with a quick glance to his brother's crotch he hoped had gone unnoticed.

His eyes scanned the pages yet again and his fingers turned them, but his mind was elsewhere. There was nothing in this book either, he was just trying to find something to do.

His mind wandered back to when they found Astrid the first time. They had found out that she was the one killing men who were cheating on their wives or girlfriends, or were just giant douche bags. She hated men. They didn't know why, maybe some poor schmuck had been cheating on her. They didn't know or really care. All that mattered was that she was killing people and it was their job to stop her.

Dean was acting as the distraction while Sam sneaked around, trying to get at her from behind. Dean had called her out, and Sam could see her getting pissed as hell. But as long as Dean kept her talking, they had her, he just needed to get a little closer. He couldn't hear exactly what Dean said, but from Dean's tone, he was being his usual cocky self.

Sam stopped just outside Astrid's living room, where they were and pulled his gun out, which was when everything went wrong.

Whatever Dean said, it made Astrid laugh with distain and she had said Dean needed to learn what it was like to be woman. Spoke quick harsh words in latin and threw something red at Dean.

Sam managed to get a shot off but missed his target who was already moving, trying to escape. He He stepped forward to pursue but then He saw Dean double over in pain, Witch or Dean? Wasn't a choice. Astrid flew out the door as Sam rushed to Dean's side.

"Dean!" He yelled as he took hold of his older brother, trying to keep him from falling over. He looked for injuries but couldn't see any damage but that didn't stop Dean from crying out in pain.

As he lay on the bed, trying not to remember, he couldn't help but remember.

Doubling over in pain, Sam rushing to his side. "What's wrong Dean? What did she do?"

Dean couldn't answer, all he knew was that his groin was on fire and that this was definitely worse than getting kicked in the balls. He fell to his knees and Sam let him slide gently to the floor and ran out the door, probably looking for the fucking witch. His eyesight grew red then black. He didn't hear Sam come back as he fell into darkness and blacked out.

"Dean, Dean! Come on, wake up man!" Sam had dragged Dean over to the couch to lean against and he slowly opened his eyes. There was still a throbbing pain in his groin, but it was bearable now, and felt different somehow.

They left Astrid's home and changed hotels to make sure the b-witch wouldn't find them before Dean let himself rest. Sam was a pain the whole time, constantly asking if he was ok, giving him the puppy eyes and worrying over him.

"Sam, I'm ok!" He shouted finally. "I'm fine. Whatever she did packed a punch but I'm fine, ok."

"Alright," Sam said reluctantly, not believing him, but letting the topic rest for now.

Dean muttered under his breath and stalked off to the bathroom to pee. It didn't hurt anymore, at least.

He unzipped his pants and looked down. It took a moment for his throat to catch up with his brain and he screamed.

Sam nearly fell off his chair when he heard Dean scream and ran to the door. As his hand brushed against the door knob he heard a click as his brother locked the door.

"Dean? You ok? Let me in!"

"NO!" Dean yelled "Oh my fucking god! Where-… I am going to KILL HER!"

Sam was puzzled but didn't let his brother's words faze him. "Dean, let me in or I'll kick down the door."

"Don't you fucking dare!" Dean yelled back, panic in his voice. Sam could hear Dean mutter in high-pitched panicked tones, but couldn't make out the words.

Sam went to his bag and quickly shuffled through it until he found his lock-picks. He went back to the bathroom and put them in the lock. On the other side of the door, the mumbling ceased and Sam could hear Dean throw himself against the door.

"Your not coming in Sam!"

Sam sighed in frustration and calmed himself.

"Fine, just- are you okay, Dean?"

Silence for a moment before a half whispered "No," Sam could barely hear.

"What's wrong?"

Nothing.

"Dean, what's wrong?"

"I can't- It's not… She took it away Sam! She took it away!"

He didn't speak for a moment. "Took what away, Dean?"

"She said… said I needed to see what it was like to be… it's gone and now.. Now I have a fucking vagina!"

Sam had no fucking clue what to say to that.

Author's note: Hehehe, ah, that was fun, but it isn't over yet. Please please comment, criticism is welcome, and so are suggestions, though no guarantee on those. I have a vague idea where this is going, and I should warn you Dean is about to get his first visit from mother nature, and won't be happy about it either.

Oh, and I am looking for a beta, if anyone is interested please let me know.