Harry's phone was ringing. He put her on speaker.

'Ruth, finally. I've got Beth, Dmitri and Lucas in the hospital now, but they can't find Malorie or locate the bomb-'

'Harry. Malorie's here. She's here.' Harry's heart seemed to stop. Ruth's voice was smaller than he'd ever heard it; it wasn't the high speed mumble she gave when bursting into his office or even the soft, tender voice she'd used on those savoured occasions. It was small and something else.

'What is she doing? Where are you Ruth?' Ruth expected this, an onslaught of questions but Harry's voice was harsher than usual. She held the phone a bit further from her ear, but her grip on it didn't falter. Harry could hear here take shallow breathes before her next answer.

'There's no bomb. It was a, uh, false trail. I was the, I am the, I'm the target Harry, Malorie,' she could hear him shouting at Tariq to get a trace on her phone, she could hear his footsteps pacing and she held on to every sound. 'Harry!' She tried to get his attention. 'Malorie's dead. I killed her, I-I killed Malorie. There's no threat. It's over.'

There was a silence. Tariq was shouting about phone lines and coding. But Harry was listening to her breathing and she was trying not to stop.

'Why can't Tariq get a trace? Where are you?'

'Look, um, Harry, there's not much time.' Her eyes went to the timer chained to her leg, only four minutes. 'I wanted to' she closed her eyes tight and tried to get the words out , she breathed in hard through her teeth 'to say… to talk to you Harry, I wanted to talk to you.'

There was something terribly wrong. He let his training take over, he but away the part of him she wanted most in that moment and began to question her further.

'HARRY, for gods sake shut up. Malorie wanted me for what I did to her operation. I'm about an twenty minutes away from any sort of real help and there is bomb with me that the Malorie Fowles designed, I don't have time to be taught how to defuse it, there's no one else around – no one will get hurt, I have no time for escape routes or ideas.'

He didn't hear anything but the word bomb. 'Ruth, I can…' Tariq was shouting suggestions.

She took the phone away from her ear, she didn't want false hope or promises now. She tried to sound gentle when she spoke again. 'No, Harry. This time you can't. I didn't ring you to be saved , I didn't ring you as an MI5 officer. Harry, I'm ringing you..'

There was a pause and he realised.

'You don't say goodbye.'

'No. No, I wanted someone to talk to.' It was defeat he heard in her voice. He took her off speaker phone and moved away from Tariq who had slumped in his chair. He took the phone to his officer and sat facing the wall.

'How long?'

She looked at the timer. 2.56. 'Three minutes.' There was silence.

He sat trying to decide what to tell her, what to say, wasting his precious moments on thinking.

'Ruth, I… it's going to be. I'll make sure,'

'Yes, of course you will. You look after Fidget.' She laughed through her words in the familiar, sad way of her. 'And Harry, don't you dare let Malcolm turn up read a poem. You know I loathe Walt Witma-'

He thought he was going to be sick. He pressed a hand against the wall to steady himself. 'Please, Ruth.'

'Harry... It's alright.' This is all wrong, he thought, I should be comforting her. But this was her greatest comfort; the sound of him missing her. 'I'm alright. I'm not one for big speeches Harry… you know that,' she was looking at the timer now, pressing the phone so close to her. 'What did you say? Not emotionally forthright.' They were laughing. 'But I did need to tell you. I need you to know-' and for the first time her voice was breaking.

'I know Ruth. I know... You don't have to.'

'No. I do.' They stopped. He was waiting to hear the words he's always longed for, but now were so unwelcome. She was battling against fear, not of the ticking clock but her old fear. Her old school girl shame and English inability to express what she held dearest.

'I – I, Harry, Oh god. I've always… Bugger it.' and they were crying now 'Harry. I love you.' She whispered. Even in these last moments she was blushing.

'I didn't hear that.' She laughed, she knew he was lying; he just wanted to hear her say it again, but she didn't care because it was all she wanted to say now, in these moments.

Her voice was stronger now. 'I love you. Harry... I love you.'

They were closer now than they ever had been, her crouched in the darkened unfamiliar room and him now on against the wall of his office; his eyes closed, hers watching the seconds slip away.

'I love you.'

'I've always, I love you.'

'Ever since you were late,'

'I should never have said…'

'I love you'

They were both caught in it now. A relationship which had been built on breath, pauses and things unsaid was filling its last moments with a jumble of words and confessions.

'Harry.' She stopped them. '12 seconds.'

12. He was shaking but she was still.

11. 'Harry, thank you, for staying

10. with me. Thank you for…

9. I'm sorry.'

8. 'No. I love you.

7. I love you Ruth Evershed.'

6. Both hands held the phone to her ear. Her body was tense and small.

5. He didn't know what to say.

4. 'I love you Ruth'

3. His voice would be the last thing she heard. She was happy.

2. 'I love you' she breathed. She dropped the phone.

1.