It had been years since Roxas had gone back to his home town, Twilight Town. Going back to a place where there wasn't any good memories left. As much as the blonde felt sick going back there, he knew he had to. He had to do it for her. If it wasn't for this tragic misfortune, Roxas may had never decided to come back.
The boy's hands were tight on the steering wheel as his memories of his childhood flooded back like a titlewave completely ingulfing him in bitterness. The thought of his parent's praising his twin brother. Roxas always being the shadow of his brother, never being able to be a good enough son. Remembering the awkward years of high school, being teased for being "odd". Always just barely passing his classes. All the teen angst he wanted to leave all behind.
The whole reason why Roxas was going home started with that frantic phone call from his brother.
"R-Ro...xas... Umh..." The sounds of Sora's choking sobs were enough to make Roxas panic. "I don't know how to say this," The tightness in his chest twisted with anxiety. "There was an acciedent... X-Xion, is, umh," No. NO. This wasn't happening. "She's not gonna make it..."
Roxas's stomach swirled with nausea.
He pulled the car over, sitting in the car scilently. Staring up at the roof of the car, he desperately held his tears back. Trying to force all the thoughts of knowing Xion wouldn't be there to greet him. The guilt of not seeing her in 6years, the fact that she was the only thing keeping him tied to this town. She was the only friend he had kept from all the bullshit he had gone through. The aching in the boy's chest wouldn't stop. How could he face this town, knowing the one thing he cared about in that town is dead. All that talk about coming back to visit her after she kept whining about missing her bestfriend, how could he do this to her?
The sudden ringing of his cellphone broke Roxas from his trance. Hands fumbling to grab his phone from the passenger's seat he answered,
"Hey, Sora. Sorry Im running a bit late, I got a bit lost." Roxas made up a lame excuse. A soft spoken voice seemed to help Roxas calm down.
"It's okay, Riku was just worried was all." He heard Riku yell faintly in the background, "No I wasn't! He's lying." It only made Roxas chuckle. Riku and Sora had been bestfriends since childhood, the ended up dating the last year of highschool and they've been together ever since. He was surprised the two hadn't gotten married yet. "Well don't worry Riku, I'll be there soon." Roxas teased back weakly. It was odd how they tried desprately to act normal. It had only been two days since her passing. "Okay Rox. Be safe..." Sora's voice grew quiet as he choked out a last few words, "I love you." His twin quickly hung up. A sad smile grew on Roxas's lips as he put his down back down on the seat. He whispered gently to himself, "Love you too."
Roxas let out a loud sigh before driving off again. Finally heading into town. Thankfully he was just on the outskirts of Twilight Town. It would only be about half a hour to get to Sora's and Riku's place.
Finally getting there, Roxas pulled up to the driveway of a small two floor townhouse. Their house was attached to a few other small town houses, all having their own tiny drive ways. Every building looked the same, bleak, small and boring.
Roxas stepped out from his small red beater car and popped open the trunk, pulling his large duffle bag.
It was hard but he knew he needed a long time off work to recover from this loss. Lucky for him Sora offered him a free place to stay for a month while he was in town. At least he could save a couple bucks that way.
Ringing the door bell a sudden loud barking greeted him. "Shh! Stop barking!" He could hear Sora's voice muffle through the door.
As the door opened, a large golden retriever greeted Roxas. The dog leaped up, tail wagging and tounge hanging out of the side of it's mouth. "Pluto!" Roxas yelped happily as he leaned down to hug his big fluffy friend. Sora laughed, "Aw, look who's missed you."
Pluto was their childhood dog, Sora and Roxas got him when they were 12years old for their birthday. Pluto was getting pretty old and Roxas felt lucky to see the little guy after leaving town.
"Hey Sora. Sorry Im so late." Roxas gave the dog a few loving kisses and some good rubs before shooing the cute little guy back inside.
"Its fine, we got the guest room all set up for you. So if you're tired you can go take a nap and settle down." Sora tucked some loose hair from his face behind his ear as he awkwardly watched his tiwn step into the house. Roxas kicked off his shoes and tried his best not to fall over due to the dog running circles around him.
It's been years since the two brothers actually saw one another in person. They were both so grown up now. Sora working at a daycare, going to night school to become a teacher. Roxas on the other hand moved all the way to Radiant Garden at 18 and worked his way up in a tech company.
The two brothers stared awkardly at each other. They could see dark circles around each other's eyes. The sorrow was quite obvious. But through the thickness of the atmosphere, Sora reached out for a tight hug. Cradling Roxas in his arms. They were both silent before Sora mumbled quietly, "I'm so sorry."
Roxas closed his eyes. Tears stinging his eyes as he forced them back. He wasn't ready to cry just yet. He just wanted this sick feeling inside him to go away.
"There's nothing nobody could of done." Roxas rubbed his twins back. Neither of them giving in to the tears they both knew they needed to shed.
The sound of Riku clearing his throat startled the two boys. "Come'on, Xion would want you two celebrating her life." Roxas glanced over at Riku. It had been years since he actually saw him! He was so different. Sort silver hair, with his bangs were pinned back (probably due to Sora telling him he needs to show off his 'handsome' face more often) , way taller then he was in highschool for sure and wow had been working out.
"You're right," Roxas sighed knowing that Xion wouldn't want them to be upset over her death. She'd want them to keep on living, to keep smiling and to cherish the time they had with her. "Sora, give us that award winning smile." Roxas teased his twin, giving the brunette's shoulder a light tap.
At first Sora's expression didnt change, he glanced between his lover and twin before giving a small twinge of a smile. "Im so thankful to have the two of you." Sora let out a weak chuckle.
"Here let me take your bag." Riku reached out and grabbed Roxas's duffle bag. "I'll show you too your room."
Roxas followed behind, heading up stairs to the second floor of the town house. Glancing around at the unfamiliar walls. Paints of beautiful unique places were hung up all over the walls, some photos of Riku and Sora making funny faces or being a lovey dovey couple. It was very, homey. It made Roxas feel more sick, it was getting harder to walk. His heart aching with guilt.
He'd missed alot of things going on in Sora's life. It wasn't like he didnt have him on facebook, or that they didnt call one another at least once a month. No. It was the fact that Roxas hadn't been here, in person, being apart of his family's life.
"Here you are." Riku placed the duffle bag on the double bed. The blanket had a simple stripe pattern. The walls were bare, besides the small tiny flat screen that hung up on the wall, across from the bed. There was a large mirror closet and a big wooden dresser next to the bed. There was a large window with a bench that seemed like a peaceful place to relax.
Roxas gave a small nod towards Riku, "Thanks. You know, for all this." It was awkward without Sora with them. It wasnt that they didnt like each other, it was more that Riku had been giving Roxas a hard time the last few years about getting in contact more with his brother.
Roxas rubbed the back of his neck, glancing around the room. Keep eye contact with Riku was too much pressure, Riku looked pretty angry. He had every right to be.
Riku huffed a sigh and brush passed Roxas. "You're welcome. Maybe this time around you'll actually give a proper goodbye before disappearing."
Sucking in a sharp breath, Roxas tried not say anything rude since he knew nothing good would come from it. "Sorry." His voice weakly replied. "I think Im gonna rest for a bit."
"Alright, I'll let Sora know." Riku headed down stairs, leaving Roxas on his own.
Roxas closed the door behind Riku, letting out a pent up sigh. It was nerve-wracking being back and Riku's slight aggression was not helping the situation.
The blonde shoved his duffle bag off the bed and undid his belt as he wiggled his way out of his jeans.
Slipping into the cold unfamiliar bed barried his face into the sheets. It smelled oddly of a sweet summer breeze. Something warm and familiar filled his memoried. A bright sunny day with a sweet salty treat. A craving of icecream he had long forgotten in his adult life, now he suddnely had this craving. The feeling of wanting to cry was over whelming but he didn't dare shed a tear.
As Roxas busied himself with his own thoughts he finally was drifting to sleep.
Roxas had been at his twin's home for two days now. Rarely going out unless Sora dragged him out to get groceries or to walk Pluto. Sometimes Riku and Roxas would sit in the back yard together having a smoke. But it was pretty quiet between the three of them. Not discussing much, mostly a few questions from Sora trying to get his brother to open up for once, but never getting anything from him. It was a lot of small talk with Riku. The three of them seemed to be too distracted by the loss. It was hard to enjoy one another's company when a death of a friend was all hanging in their mines.
Roxas had been in the guest room all morning. It was sickening to be getting dressed for something he couldn't believe was even real. Her funeral was something Roxas could never prepare for. His hands were trembling as he desperately tried to tie his stupid black tie. What was so hard about this? Its not like he's never tied one of these stupid things before!
A soft knock on the door caused the blonde to jump, hairs on the back of his neck sticking up. "C-Come in." His voice was rattled as his thoughts were disturbed.
His brother was at the door. Sora slowly walked in. Seeing blonde in his blouse that was wrinkled and miss buttoned. His tie crooked and a mess. His blonde hair sticking in every direction. The blue eyes tired and strained from the sorrow dwelling inside. Sora sighed heavily as he approached his brother. His hands quickly unbottoning his shirt to fix it up for him. "Oh Roxas." Sora's eyes were red, it looked like he had been crying already this morning. "How do you dress yourself when you're alone at home?" Sora clicked his tongue as he began go undo Roxas tie now. Roxas stared at his brother's hands. The two boys had a hard time looking in one another's eyes. Both sore and red. The begs under them obvious to anyone, even a stranger.
"I've could of done it myself." Roxas mumbled but he was greatful for Sora helping him. He was a disaster. Sora laughed softly at his brother's remake. "Uhuh sure. Here let's fix your hair in the bathroom." Roxas nodded softly as he followed his twin into the main household bathroom. Sora's hair products covered the sink vanity, along with two brightly coloured tooth brushes in a cup and a hairbrush.
"Sit." Sora pointed at the toilet. Roxas sat on the closed lid as Sora grabbed the brush and started to comb our the knots in the blonde locks. Its reminded the two boys of when they were younger and Sora use to play and style Roxas's hair. "Remember when Xion got gum stuck in her long hair and you had to cut alot of her hair off?" Roxas began reminiscing about their passed away friend.
Sora snorted a laughing picturing their childhood. Three snotty kids having a gum chewing contest. "Yeah, and we told her mom that we were playing hair dresser instead." The two laugh quietly. "She seemed to really like short hair after that huh?" Roxas mumbled.
Sora grabbed some hair gel and slicked Roxas's hair back, trying to make him look more presentable.
"Yeah. She had short hair ever since. I almost forgot she had long hair before."
Riku stumbled in on the two twins sharing such a sweet and loving moment. A weak smile curled on the silver haired man's lips. He walked over to his boyfriend. "You two almost ready?" Sora looked up, Riku seemed to holding himself together a little it better then the two younger boys but Sora was no fool. Riku was just keeping his feelings bottled.
"Yeah, we're almost done." Sora leaned up to place a small peck on his boyfriend's lips.
Riku looked down at Roxas who was staring at the two.
"Kids shouldnt watch growns up kiss like that." Riku ruffled Roxas's hair, messing up what Sora had just done.
"Hey!" Sora howled, giving his boyfriend a good punch in the arm. "Get out of here!"
Roxas couldnt help but laugh at the two. There was something so calming about how the two poked fun of each other.
It reminded him of when they were kids. "Its fine Sora. I'll finishing getting ready. I'll meet you two in the car okay?"
The boys left to let Roxas finish getting ready. The blonde went back into his room. Roxas ran his fingers back through his hair, trying to mimick how Sora had done it. A few stray blonde hairs stuck in his face but it seemed to be good as he was going to get it. He through on his black jacket and buttoned it up. Staring at himself in the mirror he did so. A grimacing grown mocked him in his reflection. It was disgusting how he looked. All he wanted to do was to scream, throws things and cry. But having a hiss fit wouldnt do anyone any good.
Roxas turned off the light as he decided he was ready to head out. He tried his best to mentally prepapre himself for one hell of a day. Knowing his childhood friend was going to be buried and he was going to be seeing some old faces he didnt want to see again.
Locking up the house Roxas hopped into the back seat of Riku's car. It was a much nicer car then Roxas's. It was blue and a newer model.
The car was silent no one seemed to talk the whole car ride to the grave yard. Roxas tried to occupy his mind with other thoughts. But the only thing he could think was missing her smile, her laugh, all the dumb things they got up to as kids and not to mention the heart breaking cries the night Roxas left town.
Guilt washed over the blonde, regretting every choice he had made.
When they had gotten to the church it seemed like a huge blur. Roxas couldnt seem to pay attention to people talking. He sat quietly and awkwardly next to his brother, who was sniffling tears.
Roxas noticed Xion's mother and father, they looked so much older since he last saw them. Her mother was sobbing into her husband's arm. The man was always stiff as a board and always seemed mad, it was the first time Roxas had seen his expression change. Xion's father had such a grim expression.
A twinge in his heart made Roxas to become ill. He just wanted to run out the door but he swallowed his guilt and sat silently.
When the ceremony started a few strangers hand spoken about Xion. They told a few stories or moments they had shared with her, nothing that could compare to the stories Roxas could tell. No. Nobody knew her as well as he did. Well maybe one other person.
Xion's parents didnt seem to feel emotionally stable enough to share their words but it was obvious they had loved her an awful lot.
Listening to the words of people speaking about her started to make Roxas feel ill again. The stirring of guilt and heart ache was a dangerous cocktail. Roxas didn't know if he could handle anymore of this.
Once the ceremony was over, Roxas ran off. Ignoring the desperate cry of his twin who was confused by the suddenness of the blonde taking off. "Where the hell is he going?" Riku grumbled and held Sora's hand tight. "He'll come back, just leave him be okay?" Riku gave Sora a quick kiss to his temple. Sora sniffled and nodded.
Roxas ran as hard as he could. The ablility to breath grew harder and harder. Sweat dripping from his face. He didn't stop till he felt his legs come weak.
He stopped for a moment to catch his breath. Ignoring the stares from people in town. They probably thought he was weird.
Roxas walked the rest of the way to the train station. His eyes growing heavy as the urge to cry was too much for the blonde to bare.
"Fuck." Roxas cursed under his breath as he stiffled back as best he could. There was barely anyone at the station, as per usual. He wondered if their secret place was still accessible.
Roxas walked towards the large station, heading to the back side of the building. An employees only sign hung above a large steel door and a small pad lock next to the door. Was the code still the same? He punched in the numbers, '3582'.
The small light on the pad lock lite up green. Ha! It worked!
Roxas opened up the large door and walked up the long swirling stair case. The memory of always complaining while walking up the never ending stairs stuck clearing in his mind, followed by Xion's chuckling. Another yank at his heart. Axel always would say a sarcastic comment about Roxas, and Xion would add something just so the two them could get a snippy remark out of Roxas. Recalling the salt sweet taste of their ice cream treats that they'd share on hot summer days. Roxas drooled as he missed that nestalgic taste.
Reaching the top of the staircase, Roxas pushed opened the heavy door. It creaked loudly. It seemed to be much more rusty since last time he was back here. It felt as if he was back in high school. Xion sitting at the edge of the clock tower waiting for him to join her. Her beautiful smile and her black hair blowing in the wind.
Roxas made his way over to the edge and swung his feet over. He stared off at the sky, admiring the roof tops of the builds and the tracks of the train. He reached his arm out, his hand cover the sun, it felt so close he could almost touch it. The sun was setting and the orange hued sky brought back the times that they'd stay up on that clock tower until it was pitch black, laughing about the dumbest things.
"Bet you don't know why the sun sets red." A voice from behind caught the blonde completely off guard. He wasn't expecting anyone to come up there. It wasn't like anyone besides Xion, him and Axel hung out up there. Turning his head, Roxas saw the redhead. His hair was shorter then Roxas had remembered it being and it was tied up in a nice ponytail. He wore an all black suit with a black tie to match. It had been along time since the two friends had seen each other, they hadnt spoken since Roxas ran off to the big city. He thought he'd get chewed out by Axel, but due to the circumstances Roxas would be left off the hook for sure.
"Red travels the fatherest, yeah yeah I know." Roxas weakily said as he quickly wiped his tears away. He didnt want to see Axel after all these years, looking completely despressed.
"Mind if I join you?" It seemed like Axel wasn't sure that Roxas wanted him around. Blonde didnt even know sure himself, however he nodded. The redhead made his way over, swinging his legs over the edge. His body was still lanky as ever and he still had that care free atmosphere.
"You didn't stick around for long." Axel commented, "I mean the funeral, not the- you know."
"Know what?" Roxas hissed back, "Leaving town? Making a better life for myself?" He refused to make eye contact with the older man. He glared off at the sun setting, not wanting to see what expression Axel's face was making.
Axel couldnt help but chuckle. Roxas still made those sassy remarks. "Still got that fire dont'cha?" The redhead huffed out a sigh. There was quite a long pause between them. Listening to the quiet town still lively though their childhood friend had just passed away. "Glad you came back, for her." Axel's voice sounded different from his usual grungy bad boy sounding voice. It was softer, quite and sad.
"Yeah." Roxas voice almost mimicked the same sound. "I had to, for her." Another long silence. The wind blew in their hair. It was getting colder the more the sun went down. It was nearly dark out.
The two boys wanted to cry, complete burst into tears but neither of them dared to. Not infront of one another. The awkward sniffling and sighs filled the silence.
"She missed you the most you know?" Axel let a weak chuckle escape his trembling lips, "She always took the chance to talk about that big shot Roxas, movin' to Raident Garden. Working in a high class business. Not having time for us small town folks."
The bitterness was obvious as Axel spoke. "She was proud of you too you know." Roxas choked up. "Always talking about your band, how you'd drive her around town or style her hair." The blonde looked over at his old friend. It was strange to be here with him at the moment but some how it was comforting. "She cared for you Axel. You were more her bestfriend then I could ever be." Roxas gently reached out and placed his hand onto Axel's hand. "You stayed. I didn't," Roxas couldnt hold back, the tears streamed down his face. There was no holding back now. "I left her. I left you. I ran away from everyone who cared and I was..." Roxas began to choke up, his voice shaking as he sobbed, "I was too late."
Axel felt his hand be grasped by the small cold hands of Roxas's. His fist curling tightly but quickly loosened as the blonde spoke. He began to cry himself, finally holding Roxas's hand back. "You couldn't of know this would happen." Axel pulled Roxas closer to him. The older man held Roxas tightly. Axel cried silently along with Roxas. Neither of them daring to speak another word.
They sat there until the shaking breathes of sobs became shivering breathes. The sun completely gone away and the glow of the moon lite up the night. Axel loosened his hold on Roxas. "We should head down from here before we turn into popsicles." Axel looked down at the blonde. His eyes red, damp and puffy. Axel was sure, his eyes looked the same. A light nod and Roxas pulled himself from Axel's arms. "Yeah."
The two childhood friends abandoned their hangout spot and walked down the creepy stair case. The clanking of their footsteps on the metal grate steps echoed down the steep hall. "Im really sorry." Roxas said, his voice seeming louder due to the echoing. "For what?" Axel stupidly asked. "For leaving. Not keeping in contact. Only speaking to Xion."
"Yeah well whats done is done. Nothing to be sorry about now. Your here, we're talking now. I think you're forgiven, since yea' know, she's gone." Axel had to cruely remind Roxas that he was only back in town because of Xion's death.
The rest of the way down was quiet. Axel held the door open for Roxas as the made their way back out to the real world. Into the town.
"Should we split ways?" Axel asked as he looked over his shoulder. He was expecting to see a way smaller blonde boy and a black haired girl. But instead it was just the blonde and he had gotten quite a bit taller. He was almost as tall as Axel now. It was odd having Roxas back.
"I guess." What was this disappointing feeling Roxas had, he wanted to stay in Axel's presence for much longer. All night if he could. But he didnt want to make things awkward.
Axel gave Roxas a grin, "Whats with that look?" He chuckled at the blonde and wrapped his arm around his shoulder. "You can say you want to catch up with me, you know." Why was Axel acting like nothing has changed? Why be so kind when he should be yelling at Roxas? "Where are you staying?"
"Sora and Riku's place." Roxas spoke up, pushing Axel's arm off his shoulder. "I dont think having a guest over would be such a good idea right now."
Axel nodded only agreeing that heading to Sora's place wouldn't be good. Mostly since Riku never liked Axel to begin with. He couldnt seem to ever get Riku to like him. "Why dont you come over to mine then? Its not too far from here." Axel proposed.
Axel really seemed to be pushing it. He wanted Roxas to come over. Sure Roxas didnt want to part with him right now but he was still supicious of Axel yelling at him for ditching them. "I dont want to impose." Roxas politely said.
"Its fine, come'on Roxy. We can reminisce, celebrate Xion's memory together." Axel hooked his arm around Roxas's and dragged him along. Sighing and giving up, Roxas went along with his old friend. "My cars just in the parking lot."
The two hopped into a small red old sports car. It was in decent condition and Axel decorated it with fuzzy dice dangling from the mirror. Axel had a much better ride now then when they were in highschool.
The ride over to Axel's was pretty quiet. A few sniffles from Roxas every now and again filled the awkward void. But neither of them speaking.
They pulled up to a pretty large townhouse. Much bigger then his brother's place.
As the two stepped out of the car Axel fumbled with his keys abit and unlocked the door.
"So do you live alone?" Roxas asked as Axel let two of them in. Axel nodded as he flicked on the lights, "Yeah for the most part. Demyx pays rent and had all his crap here but he's usually at his boyfriend's place." Roxas made a small 'oh' sound as they kicked off their dress shoes. The redhead stuffed his keys in his jacket pocket and hung the jacket up lazily on the disaster of a coat rack he had.
Axel wondered into his home, making his way to the kitchen. The blonde slowly following behind. "Want a drink? Beer? Cooler?" Roxas rolled his eyes, in high school Roxas refused to drink beer so Axel would get him sweet coolers.
"Water is just fine." Axel laughed at Roxas sassy attitude. "Water it is." The redhead pulled a can of beer out for himself.
Roxas stared at the somewhat messy kitchen. Mail was stacked on the top of the fridge, photos and megnates decorated the side of the fridge. Dishes were stacked in the sink.
As Roxas's eyes wondered the kitchen, Axel poured the boy a glass of water.
"So Demyx has a boyfriend huh?" Roxas saw some photos of Axel and Demyx with some other people he didnt recognize stuck on the fridge.
"Mmmhm. Zexion. He moved to town a few years ago." Axel handed Roxas his glass. Roxas awkward took it and sipped at it. He was nervous. Palms sweating and toes curling.
"Come'on lets go sit down." Axel wondered into the living room. The home was way different then Sora's for sure. The furniture was all mismatching. The coach old and warn out. Two love seats that were plush but bright colours. There was no dinning area and a small coffee table that was banged up.
Roxas sat awkward in one of the love seats. His hand tightly holding his water. Axel took a swig of his beer as they sat in silence for a bit before Axel spoke up.
"That was Xion's spot. We went out shopping as she saw that dumb thing in the window. Made me buy it cause she said my couch was a dump."
Roxas snorted, "Well she wasnt wrong." Roxas rested his hand on the arm rest, racing his fingers against the fabric as he fantasized about what her reaction was seeing this bright green chair. How'd she'd sit here hanging out with Axel, laughing and watch TV or drinking a beer or even play video games.
"Hey! I happen to like this couch. You two were always pickin' fights with me." Axel bitterly muttered as he sipped at his beer.
"Yeah but Xion always won, even if she fought against me." Roxas stated.
Axel laughed, "Its cause she was so stuborn. She never gave up." He glanced over at Roxas who seemed to be alot less upset then before. It seemed liked he was enjoying remembering all the good memories and yapping about her.
"You know Xion kept me up to date in all the Twilight town news. For the most part." Roxas mentioned. "Telling me when you had a good gig, how excited you'd get about it. Or when Naime and her finally started dating."
"Yeah too bad they broke up." Axel said, "They were really happy together. Though I think Naime was still crushing on you." The redhead pointed out.
There was an awkward silence again. The two drinking quitely as the conversation went a bit sour. At least thats how Roxas felt.
Axel cleared his throat as he tried to break the awkward tension. "So umh, Im going to Xion's apartment tomorrow. Her parents left me in charge of packing up her things. Her mom hasn't even gone to her place." Axel mumbled griefly. "Probably to scared of having a melt down." He glanced towards Roxas. "Wanna come help? I was there yesterday Theres some things you might want to take a look at."
Roxas was confused but nodded. "Yeah. It might give me some closure." He felt the urge to cry again.
"It'll be good for you to see how happy she was." Axel commented as he could see the guilty expression Roxas was wearing. He was still an open book.
Roxas placed his cup on the coffee table and stood up. "I think Im gonna go home. I dont want to be worrying Sora." His voice was weak but he knew Sora would be freaking out if he didn't come home.
"Here let me give you a ride home." Axel offered. Roxas only shook his head. "You already had a drink I'd rather you not." Axel only rolled his eyes but he didnt pressure Roxas into anything that would make him uncomfortable. "At least let me call you a taxi." Axel offered instead.
Roxas only shook his head. "I'll just walk there. It's just a twenty minute walk."
And with that Roxas tried making his way out. While he started to slip on his shoes Axel went through his coat closet and pulled out a leather jacket. He threw it at Roxas, who let out an annoyed grunt.
"Put it on, its cold. You were shaking like a leaf earlier." Axel mumbled as Roxas stared at him shyly. "Umh, you sure?" Roxas questioned.
"Yeah just bring it with you tomorrow. I'll come pick you up around ten-thirty." Axel smiled and patted Roxas's head.
"Okay, thanks." Roxas slipped on the jacket, it was two sizes too big but still looked quite good on him. "See you tomorrow then."
Axel waved Roxas off as he wondered the dark night streets.
It was only a twenty minute walk from Axel's place back to his brother's.
As he made his way down the sidewalk he stared up at the stars wondering if Xion was amongst them, twinkling in the night sky. "I miss you." The blonde muttered out to himself as he sniffled back a tear. As awkward and hard it was to face everyone he left behind, Roxas wish he had been home sooner. But he was wrapped up in his own little world, forgetting what was important to him. Who was important to him. He needed to change, he wanted to change. Roxas decided that he'd move back to his home town, not just for Xion but for everyone.
Roxas made it back to his tiwn's place. He walked up the driveway, lifted up the flower pot by the door and grabbed the spare key to let himself in. Surprisingly the living room light was still on. Sora and pluto came rushing to the door. Sora in complete tears. "Roxas! Oh thank god." His brunette twin threw himself at the blonde. Pluto leaping around them. Pouncing up to try get into the hug.
"S-Sora, why are you so upset?" Roxas hugged his brother back as his twin tightly gripped him.
A sniffling mumble came from Sora. "You were gone so long.. a-and I wasn't sure... I didn't want you... I mean..." Sora was a crying mess, his words becoming nonsense.
"Im sorry." Roxas voice was just a whisper. "I didn't want to worry you." He was finding his own tears dripping from his cheeks. When did he start crying? "I was with Axel. We...we went to his place and remanisted about Xion."
Sora rubbed his damp face with his hands, try to dry up his tears. "I see..." Sora mumbled again. Leaning away from his twin. "There's pizza in the fridge if you're hungry."
Roxas nodded and slipped off his shoes. He felt cozy and safe in Axel's jacket. He didnt bother taking it off.
He wondered into the kitchen and grabbed some cold pizza from the fridge. Pluto following behind, tail wagging.
"Who's jacket are you wearing." Sora asked as he tried to keep tabs with his twin. It was easy for Roxas to keep quiet and not talk, just completely shut down. But Sora didnt want that to happen, he was worried about his twin. Not to mention that Roxas easily ignored his problems.
"Axel's." Roxas's voice was muffled by the cold pizza he was stuffing in his face. He hadn't eaten all day, he was starting to feel sick.
A few sniffles came from Sora as he was calming down. "I see. You know Axel really missed you." Sora leaned against the kitchen counter as he stared at the blonde.
"Yeah?" Roxas glanced over at Sora.
Sora nodded, "Axel use to hang out alot with Riku, Kairi and I while you were gone. " He smiled weakly towards his twin. "He would always nag us if you talked to any us."
Roxas only chuckled. Axel must of been really missing Roxas if he had been spending so much time with his brother. Not that they all didnt hang out when they were younger but because Axel never really hung out with them unless Roxas was there.
Sora smiled gently and curled his arms against his chest. "Did you wanna have a monster movie marathon tomorrow? I'll grab snacks in the morning and we can watch something scary?"
Roxas caught by surprise. Sora disliked monster movies cause they were so corny but Roxas loved them. He usually watched them with Xion and Axel.
"How about the day after? Axel and I are gonna be packing up Xion's apartment tomorrow."
Sora frowned, Roxas and Axel cleaning Xion's apartment? Are they really emotionally ready for that? "Do you think thats a good idea Roxas?"
"Yeah. Its fine. Besides I wanna see how she was living. I missed out that part of her life." Roxas shrugged off his brother's depressing expression. He sighed. "Im tired so Im going to bed. Come'on Pluto." Roxas turned off to head to bed.
Sora chanting a small 'goodnight' as his twin walked up the stairs with the dog following suit.
There was loud snoring coming from Sora's room. Riku must be asleep already.
Roxas made it to his room and closed the door half way and flopped on the bed. Pluto leaped up and curled up next to Roxas. The sound of the dog's breathing helped the blonde relax.
"Fuck." Roxas grumbled into the blankets. His eyes sore from all the crying. He was so sick of this feeling. So exhausted from fighting off the tears. The guilt of never being there for her when she needed him. For ditching her. Why was Roxas such a mess?
Roxas lazily unzipped Axel's leather jacket and tossed it on the floor. He tucked off his clothes and stared at the ceiling for a moment before climbing off to get into his fleece pajama pants.
"You think she knew I loved her?" Roxas mumbled to his dog. Who only yawned in response. The blonde smiled and shook his head before crawling into bed. "She must of known right?"
Pluto crawled up onto Roxas chest and laid with him. The sound of the dog's heart beat let still room become much more lively.
Fighting off the tears was more phyiscally draining then he could possibly imagine. Tears running down his cheek as he tried his best not to let go of his emotions but the quivering of his lips and the pent up sadness was finally catching up.
Roxas quickly grabbed an extra pillow that was laying next to him and quickly covered his face to muffle back his sobs. He couldnt bare it anymore. His breathing became rapid and it was hard to get any oxygen in from all the heaving. The blonde was a mess. His eyes clamped shut hoping that they'd stop flowing but he couldnt. He did his best to try to breath properly through his heaving sobs but it was unexpectedly difficult.
The boy spend hours crying. Pluto whimpered and cuddled his owner more and more, shuffling to give Roxas a few kisses.
Roxas ruffled the top of the dog's head. "I'm sorry boy." He sniffled as he felt his heart calm down,though the tears didnt stop flowing. "Im alright now. I promise."
Roxas ran his hand down Pluto's back, soothingly petting his dog. Pluto was always so comforting.
It wasn't long after that Roxas fell asleep with just a few tears left to barely shed.