Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter! I'm very, very poor...
The Broom Closet
Summary: Since the beginning of Hogwarts, the Broom Closet has served multiple people in having a night of privacy to themselves. The door of the room will not open unless the act of "doing it" has been performed...meaning intercourse of some kind must take place, or else the door will not open in the morning. Instead, the two occupants are locked inside until they spend one night in passion...however; the two newest residents are more than likely willing to waste away on opposite sides of the closet walls...
Prelude: Why are we here?
Being stuck in a closet was humiliating and all around it just sucked. Harry hated being in here, and if only it were him, it would be easier. Truth is, he was stuck in there with a Professor Severus Snape, who had been pulled in along with Harry, and the door closed behind them, leaving no way out. And it was dark...very dark, well, there was a little light coming from the crack in the door, and he stayed close to the light, while Snape sat back against the opposite edge.
"Remind me Mr. Potter, why we are stuck here again..." Snape said dangerously, although the boredom in his voice was apparent.
"Well, you were talking to Malfoy and me and then he pushed me into this closet which was open. I grabbed onto you for support and ended up dragging you into here as well," Harry said.
"Do you know which broom closet this is?" Snape asked.
"No sir," Harry said, "I don't."
"This is the one broom closet that everyone knows about for its allowance of a night of lustful passions..." Snape began.
"Oh, so this is where Hermione and Ron have been going for the past year..." Harry said thoughtfully, he had often ended up wondering where they had gone on odd nights during this past year, and well, now he finally knew.
"And the closet will remain closed until..." Snape began again.
"I thought it odd that they didn't return back to the common room some nights, I wondered where they could have gone," Harry interrupted.
"POTTER, ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING?" Snape yelled and then managed to quiet himself.
"I think so...to sum it up...Gee, we're stuck?" Harry asked humorously.
"Until..." Snape prompted.
"Are you serious? That's the only way to get out of here?" Harry asked.
"Mr. Potter, paying attention for once, that's a surprise..." Snape said with a sigh.
"Shut it," Harry said and stood up again, trying to open the door.
"It won't work," Snape said, "We aren't getting out any other way than the original purpose that this room was created for."
"I am not doing that!" Harry exclaimed as he sat down on the floor again, "At least it's clean in here..."
"That's the only thing you notice?" Snape asked, "Of course it's clean!" He said the last part sarcastically.
"We're never getting out of here...I'm gonna die of hunger!" Harry whined.
"Harry, is that you in there mate?" a voice asked, and Harry emitted a groan. Just what he needed, Ron...bloody hell...
"Harry, is that you in there mate?" Ron asked, "Finally found someone, eh?"
"Shut it Ron, I didn't find anyone," Harry said.
"That's a little disturbing then that you're in there by yourself," Ron said.
"Oh, and to think of all the times you were in here!" Harry exclaimed.
"I was with Hermione!" he exclaimed.
"Don't start with that! The images in my mind..." Harry groaned.
"Is Harry in there?" Hermione asked, coming up and hugging Ron's neck, "Who's he with?"
"Apparently no one Hermione," Ron said, starting to laugh.
"It's anyone but no one, and the situation isn't funny!" Harry said.
"I think it is!" Ron howled and laughed harder.
"Tell your little friends to bugger off," a harsher, deeper voice stated from the closet. Ron's laughing stopped laughing in about an instant.
"SNAPE?" Ron exclaimed.
"Professor?" Hermione asked, being a little bit more respectful.
"Yeah, like I said, the situation isn't funny," Harry said.
"I'll go get the headmaster...surely there must be some way to break the spells on this door..." Hermione said, "I mean...surely the closet could realize that..."
"It won't...we've tried," Harry said gravely.
"I'm still sure the headmaster..." Hermione began again.
"If you do than the whole school will know by tomorrow!" Snape said loud enough that Hermione hung her head and said nothing.
"So, you two have no way of getting out then?" Ron asked.
"Not unless we go at it the way you do with Hermione!" Harry shouted.
"That's a little crude," Ron said, "And I don't think...never mind."
"Well, then...you're stuck, officially. No one can go in or out...nothing can get in or out until..." Hermione said and bit a nail.
"We can't exactly help you then...but...I actually find this situation amusing!" Ron said, "You're stuck in there with your least favorite Professor and no way to get out... I pity you though as well..."
"I don't need YOUR PITY!" Harry exclaimed.
"Temper, temper..." Snape muttered and Ron began to laugh again.
"You two seem to make a funny couple," Ron said.
"NOT FUNNY!" Harry yelled.
"RONALD WEASLY 50 POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR!" Snape yelled as loud as he could.
"Worth it, it was totally worth it!" Ron said and led Hermione away from the closet. Hermione, however, went back to the door to give warning.
"We promise not to tell yet...but people who use this thing regularly..." Hermione began.
"Like you two?" Harry puffed out.
"Well, yes... They're going to wonder who's in the closet and why they can't get in..." Hermione said, "If you two don't get out of there, that is..."
"I am not going to do anything!" Harry said.
"I'm sorry Harry, I'll do some research if I can, but I can almost swear that it's the only way out..." Hermione said.
"Before we completely leave you, how'd you get in there?" Ron asked.
"I was pushed and I grabbed...Professor Snape for support," Harry said slowly, almost reluctantly.
"Well Harry, I do pity you..." Hermione said.
"I already said I don't need pity," Harry said.
"You should be hungry; I'll try and find a way to get some sort of food into there," Hermione said, "Remember you didn't eat much at dinner tonight."
"..." Harry didn't reply to that.
"I'm going to the library now, I'll try and help!" Hermione said, "I'm sure Ron can help to if I force him."
"Don't need to force me. If we can get him out by any other means, let's do it!" Ron said and dragged Hermione off again.
"We'll see you later Harry, please don't do anything foolish!" she said as she let Ron drag her off. It was a polite way to say you better not bang the professor unless you were desperate.
"What the hell?" Snape asked, "Did those two basically ignore me?"
"I don't think they needed to know your position on it seeing as how you already deducted points from Ron," Harry said, "Hermione's bright...she can do something...can't she?"
"This room has been enchanted this way since the founder's time...I won't pass hope," Snape said dejectedly. Harry sighed again and pressed his head to the closet door. He definitely didn't want to be here.
TBC
A/N: Like it? Hate it? I just had this idea in my head and I can't get it out so I'm writing it. It'll get better or worse depending on my mood, but this chapter was just a lighter because I'm posting two versions of this, one on FFN and another, the dirtier version on AFFN, so bear with me on updates and the like. Please don't flame me, but honest non-flaming feedback is appreciated...! Tell me if you want me to update!
The Broom Closet
Summary: Since the beginning of Hogwarts, the Broom Closet has served multiple people in having a night of privacy to themselves. The door of the room will not open unless the act of "doing it" has been performed...meaning intercourse of some kind must take place, or else the door will not open in the morning. Instead, the two occupants are locked inside until they spend one night in passion...however; the two newest residents are more than likely willing to waste away on opposite sides of the closet walls...
Prelude: Why are we here?
Being stuck in a closet was humiliating and all around it just sucked. Harry hated being in here, and if only it were him, it would be easier. Truth is, he was stuck in there with a Professor Severus Snape, who had been pulled in along with Harry, and the door closed behind them, leaving no way out. And it was dark...very dark, well, there was a little light coming from the crack in the door, and he stayed close to the light, while Snape sat back against the opposite edge.
"Remind me Mr. Potter, why we are stuck here again..." Snape said dangerously, although the boredom in his voice was apparent.
"Well, you were talking to Malfoy and me and then he pushed me into this closet which was open. I grabbed onto you for support and ended up dragging you into here as well," Harry said.
"Do you know which broom closet this is?" Snape asked.
"No sir," Harry said, "I don't."
"This is the one broom closet that everyone knows about for its allowance of a night of lustful passions..." Snape began.
"Oh, so this is where Hermione and Ron have been going for the past year..." Harry said thoughtfully, he had often ended up wondering where they had gone on odd nights during this past year, and well, now he finally knew.
"And the closet will remain closed until..." Snape began again.
"I thought it odd that they didn't return back to the common room some nights, I wondered where they could have gone," Harry interrupted.
"POTTER, ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING?" Snape yelled and then managed to quiet himself.
"I think so...to sum it up...Gee, we're stuck?" Harry asked humorously.
"Until..." Snape prompted.
"Are you serious? That's the only way to get out of here?" Harry asked.
"Mr. Potter, paying attention for once, that's a surprise..." Snape said with a sigh.
"Shut it," Harry said and stood up again, trying to open the door.
"It won't work," Snape said, "We aren't getting out any other way than the original purpose that this room was created for."
"I am not doing that!" Harry exclaimed as he sat down on the floor again, "At least it's clean in here..."
"That's the only thing you notice?" Snape asked, "Of course it's clean!" He said the last part sarcastically.
"We're never getting out of here...I'm gonna die of hunger!" Harry whined.
"Harry, is that you in there mate?" a voice asked, and Harry emitted a groan. Just what he needed, Ron...bloody hell...
"Harry, is that you in there mate?" Ron asked, "Finally found someone, eh?"
"Shut it Ron, I didn't find anyone," Harry said.
"That's a little disturbing then that you're in there by yourself," Ron said.
"Oh, and to think of all the times you were in here!" Harry exclaimed.
"I was with Hermione!" he exclaimed.
"Don't start with that! The images in my mind..." Harry groaned.
"Is Harry in there?" Hermione asked, coming up and hugging Ron's neck, "Who's he with?"
"Apparently no one Hermione," Ron said, starting to laugh.
"It's anyone but no one, and the situation isn't funny!" Harry said.
"I think it is!" Ron howled and laughed harder.
"Tell your little friends to bugger off," a harsher, deeper voice stated from the closet. Ron's laughing stopped laughing in about an instant.
"SNAPE?" Ron exclaimed.
"Professor?" Hermione asked, being a little bit more respectful.
"Yeah, like I said, the situation isn't funny," Harry said.
"I'll go get the headmaster...surely there must be some way to break the spells on this door..." Hermione said, "I mean...surely the closet could realize that..."
"It won't...we've tried," Harry said gravely.
"I'm still sure the headmaster..." Hermione began again.
"If you do than the whole school will know by tomorrow!" Snape said loud enough that Hermione hung her head and said nothing.
"So, you two have no way of getting out then?" Ron asked.
"Not unless we go at it the way you do with Hermione!" Harry shouted.
"That's a little crude," Ron said, "And I don't think...never mind."
"Well, then...you're stuck, officially. No one can go in or out...nothing can get in or out until..." Hermione said and bit a nail.
"We can't exactly help you then...but...I actually find this situation amusing!" Ron said, "You're stuck in there with your least favorite Professor and no way to get out... I pity you though as well..."
"I don't need YOUR PITY!" Harry exclaimed.
"Temper, temper..." Snape muttered and Ron began to laugh again.
"You two seem to make a funny couple," Ron said.
"NOT FUNNY!" Harry yelled.
"RONALD WEASLY 50 POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR!" Snape yelled as loud as he could.
"Worth it, it was totally worth it!" Ron said and led Hermione away from the closet. Hermione, however, went back to the door to give warning.
"We promise not to tell yet...but people who use this thing regularly..." Hermione began.
"Like you two?" Harry puffed out.
"Well, yes... They're going to wonder who's in the closet and why they can't get in..." Hermione said, "If you two don't get out of there, that is..."
"I am not going to do anything!" Harry said.
"I'm sorry Harry, I'll do some research if I can, but I can almost swear that it's the only way out..." Hermione said.
"Before we completely leave you, how'd you get in there?" Ron asked.
"I was pushed and I grabbed...Professor Snape for support," Harry said slowly, almost reluctantly.
"Well Harry, I do pity you..." Hermione said.
"I already said I don't need pity," Harry said.
"You should be hungry; I'll try and find a way to get some sort of food into there," Hermione said, "Remember you didn't eat much at dinner tonight."
"..." Harry didn't reply to that.
"I'm going to the library now, I'll try and help!" Hermione said, "I'm sure Ron can help to if I force him."
"Don't need to force me. If we can get him out by any other means, let's do it!" Ron said and dragged Hermione off again.
"We'll see you later Harry, please don't do anything foolish!" she said as she let Ron drag her off. It was a polite way to say you better not bang the professor unless you were desperate.
"What the hell?" Snape asked, "Did those two basically ignore me?"
"I don't think they needed to know your position on it seeing as how you already deducted points from Ron," Harry said, "Hermione's bright...she can do something...can't she?"
"This room has been enchanted this way since the founder's time...I won't pass hope," Snape said dejectedly. Harry sighed again and pressed his head to the closet door. He definitely didn't want to be here.
TBC
A/N: Like it? Hate it? I just had this idea in my head and I can't get it out so I'm writing it. It'll get better or worse depending on my mood, but this chapter was just a lighter because I'm posting two versions of this, one on FFN and another, the dirtier version on AFFN, so bear with me on updates and the like. Please don't flame me, but honest non-flaming feedback is appreciated...! Tell me if you want me to update!